Some general advice here for constructing contentions; <--start there, and then breaking down ideas will be a lot easier. Generally, you need to have a dominant argument across your essay, and then three to four (approx.) sub-arguments
that support your main point! It can take some practice, but it'll put you miles ahead of the rest of the state - you'd be surprised how few students end up managing to construct an effective essay like this.
You're already off to a good start with this intro, and the fact that you can look through feedback and come to conclusions about what you need to work on tells me you're pretty damn smart, so see how you go unpacking and questioning this prompt a bit, and you'll hopefully be able to plot out an essay structure from there.
In terms of actual planning (like, how you prepare your approach mentally or on paper), students tend to exist on a spectrum from:
|| don't plan at all and just jump into writing || --> || meh, I plan a little sometimes || --> || MUST PLAN EVERY SINGLE DETAIL OMG ||
I was always on the left hand side; my 'plans' would consist of the odd scribbled reminder to myself to mention certain evidence or use a certain word. But I had friends in Year 12 who would always spend the first five to ten minutes of writing time just drafting up an extensive plan because doing so meant they could churn out an essay in forty minutes or so. It really depends what kind of thinker/writer you are, and how efficient you can be.
If you're looking for a general overview of idea planning...
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Introduction: • (global sentence about the text)
• contention
• (sub-arguments)
Body Paragraph 1: • (general focus - 10 words or less)
• topic sentence
• major evidence
• (quotes)
• concluding sentence
x repeat for all body paragraphs
Conclusion: • (sub-arguments)
• reworded contention
• zooming-out sentences about characters --> themes --> views and values
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(stuff in brackets is optional)
Well, technically everything's optional... PLANNING is optional, and you should only be doing it if you think it's genuinely going to help you write better/faster. But the non-bracketed stuff is what I'd consider to be most important for most students.
Let us know if you have any questions