Cashless transactions are becoming extremely popular, due to their ease
this sentence strikes me as a little clumsy, and as such, Hailey
fairly sure you should be using 'Astaire' from the start?’s local grocery store recently made that change. Hailey Astaire, the store’s manager, publishes an advertorial to inform customers of the change. In a friendly and optimistic tone, Astaire contends that cashless transactions are very efficient, and will assist customers greatly in their shopping experience. She intends
good to sway local customers into realising that cashless is the best solution for shopping, and to see that all the stores intentions are in the best interest of the customers. Resident Samuel Morricone responds to the advertorial, critically, asserting that going fully cashless benefits the store more than the customers. He wants residents to condemn Astaire’s idea, ultimately hoping that the grocery store will rethink going cashless. Visual images accompany the respective articles.
your whole introduction feels a little choppy, try changing the sentence structures/lengthsAstaire consistently argues that the new change of cashless transactions has been made for the convenience of customers. By beginning her piece by addressing her ‘valued customers,’ readers are immediately able to see that all the stores
grammar - remember the apostrophe actions are in the best interest of them
maybe change to 'the customers'?. This, coupled with the statement ‘we always put our customers first,’ underlines the stores
again, apostrophe values and honoured relationship with the customers. This removes
be careful how you express this the divide between the two groups, allowing a sense of camaraderie and trust to be built between Astaire and buyers. By expressing that they ‘abolished plastic carry bags….long before the big stores,’ the author indirectly undermines their competitors
...and also builds themselves up. Thus, readers are able to realise that the store is much more advanced than the others. As removing plastic bags was the correct action to take to reduce environmental wastage, readers are likely to believe that going cashless too benefits the wider society, making them more inclined to support the decision. Astaire outlines that customers won’t ‘need to go rummaging through their bags for coins.’ As such, the author is appealing to a sense of practicality
good. Readers are positioned to reflect on the instances that they were in a similar position, and the inconvenience that needing to pay with cash brought. Therefore, they compelled
grammar to support the idea, as it overrides the personal difficulties customers may have faced whilst shopping. By stating that ‘I’m in our store every day,’ Astaire establishes her commitment to the store, but it also demonstrates that she first-handily
is this a word? sees the difficulties of a cash transaction. It also highlights her argument – that she is initiating the change as she personally wants to create ease for her ‘valued customers.’ The image supports this sentiment, as it depicts a smiley
hmmm, not sure about the wisdom of using 'smiley' store owner with a customer. The handshake symbolises the stores connection with shoppers, and their desire to always fulfil their needs. The smiling faces of the humans
word choice? accentuates the homey feeling of the store, allowing customers to visually see how valued they truly are.
Astaire shifts to a more practical tone
nice to proclaim the necessity of cashless transactions in a modern world. By suggesting that ‘Australians have embraced the digital economy,’ the author subtly praises the values of the wider public, encouraging her customers to do the same.
[Sorry - ran out of time here 
] The author contrasts the modern world with an older time, in which ‘70% of household spending was in cash.’ This is designed to sway readers into realising that the world has modernised, and they too must follow the trends. This positions them to support the cashless transactions, as the grocery store is assisting them to reflect modern, convenient, and technologically advanced values. The author further attracts customers by revealing her awareness for safety. As their area had ‘recent pickpocketing,’ and ‘paying electronically is safer,’ customers are enticed and almost forced to support cashless payments. Astaire sets up the customers to feel bad and uncaring if they don’t support such a safe solution to the burglary. In citing Phillip Lowe’s opinion, that ‘cash was set to become a rarity,’ readers are positioned to see that soon, all stores will become cashless. The use of the credible source also demonstrates that higher authorities and experienced money personal are encouraging the shift, and isn’t just an incentive of the store.
Morricone utilises a condemnatory and disappointed tone to outline his disagreement towards cashless transactions. He illustrates his right to speak for the shop as ‘that is where [he] shops.’ By questioning ‘who is she kidding?’ Morricone reflects his dissatisfaction for Astaire’s idea, prompting readers to form a sceptical view of the store owner. Morricone speaks on behalf of customers by claiming that ‘many of us [aren’t] ready.’ As a result, residents are guided into understanding that the grocery is rushing into solutions. Morricone uses anecdotal evidence as his aged mother ‘relies on cash.’ The builds a connection between the author and readers that may be in a similar position, making Astaire’s intentions seem inconsiderate. The author appeals to a sense of community spirit as he expresses that the store believes people like his mother ‘don’t matter,’ downgrading the stores intentions. Morricone inclusively believes ‘we are a better community than that.’ This is designed to startle residents into realising that the towns intimate relationships and values will break in the introduction of cashless transactions. As such, shoppers are prompted to demand a better solution from Astaire, in fear of losing their sense of community. The added visual illustrates a cashless transaction machine. The words ‘errors, out of service,’ amplifies the inconsistencies and implications of such a process. By engaging in this visual, shoppers are prompted to understand that the introduction of cashless shopping is not as smooth of a process that Astaire makes it out to be. This influences them to tread carefully around their introduction.
Astaire concludes her piece by offering a temporary alternative to cashless shopping for those ready yet. This allows readers to see her as reasonable and understanding. In an attempt to weaken their opponents. Astaire expresses that ‘less customer centred shops,’ will take cash. Therefore, the customers are led to feel a sense of pride for grocery store, as they shopping at a place that truly strives on pleasing customers. As a result, they are much more inclined to support cashless transactions, to make their store even better. Morricone ends his accusatory piece by lamenting that it is only ‘the store,’ that benefits from going cashless. As this was backed up with ‘research,’ shoppers are made transparent of the true intentions of the store. As this selfish behaviour does not characterise the towns values, readers are compelled to disagree, an almost feel used by the store, for their economic benefits. Additionally, as the store publishes a paid advertisement, readers are further likely to see that the store is desperate for income and attention.
Conclusively, Astaire utilises her inspiring pieced to signal the benefits and efficiencies of a cashless transaction. She remains determines to please her customers, and gain support for the store’s new initiative. Dissimilarly, Morricone denigrates the idea, realising that it is purely the store that gains from going cashless, and hopes that Astaire will rethink her idea.
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