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March 29, 2024, 02:01:10 am

Author Topic: [English] "Don’t blame me, blame Julia Gillard" language analysis  (Read 6235 times)  Share 

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lexitu

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Re: January Week Three - The Ghost Inside's thread
« Reply #15 on: January 25, 2011, 04:44:00 pm »
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All essays are imperfect in their own way. I'm not saying it's going to cost you hugely, just that it "might be stretching it". Almost indisputably though it's not a correct thing to do for language analysis and the mistakes that you make accumulate so obviously it's better not to do it. It also doesn't contribute to making your analysis any longer because you're not adhering to the task. The substance of the piece isn't changed, or if anything it suffers.

leona0123

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Re: January Week Three - The Ghost Inside's thread
« Reply #16 on: January 25, 2011, 04:55:38 pm »
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Hey there,
Overall I would say this is a good effort at analysing Bolt's article. One thing that I would suggest is to talk about any appeals that the author makes in the article. Quickly reading through Bolt's piece, I can see that he has made several attacks on the Labor government and backed these up with anecdotal and statistical evidence. To me this seems like an attempt to appeal to the audience's sense of reason, as Bolt has made them (the audience) feel as though it would be irrational to disagree with him since there is so much evidence supporting his argument.
By describing the fatal incidents involving the boat people, Bolt also appeals to sympathy, sense of justice and social responsibility. The reader feels sorry for the refugees and feels as though justice needs to be served. They also feel the social responsibility to support Bolt's argument, as doing otherwise might make them seem partly responsible for, or as though they are in favour of, the deaths of the refugees.
Hopefully this makes sense! I'd give you a 6-7/10 overall. Well done :)
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EvangelionZeta

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Re: January Week Three - The Ghost Inside's thread
« Reply #17 on: January 25, 2011, 05:58:46 pm »
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Attached.
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EvangelionZeta

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Re: January Week Three - The Ghost Inside's thread
« Reply #18 on: January 25, 2011, 06:11:05 pm »
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Also I'd like to add that perhaps you could make the image analysis two paragraphs, since 340 words is a bit long.  My preferred format is to have one paragraph on the image by itself, and the other on the image in relation to the article.
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LOVEPHYSICS

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Re: January Week Three - The Ghost Inside's thread
« Reply #19 on: January 25, 2011, 07:32:51 pm »
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Well regarding the evaluating LA pieces issue, I have to agree with Lexitu. ^^ Our school certainly does not endorse it, and nor would I. I just don't think it's a risk worth taking in the exam.
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jaccerz

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Re: January Week Three - The Ghost Inside's thread
« Reply #20 on: January 26, 2011, 12:33:33 am »
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just thought i would add, I was told last year when i did it, that if the information gives you the date of the article, to include it in your first sentence. otherwise you lose marks for it.
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LOVEPHYSICS

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Re: January Week Three - The Ghost Inside's thread
« Reply #21 on: January 26, 2011, 06:46:46 pm »
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To lose a mark straight without the date, that is pretty tight in my opinion. It certainly wouldn't go down well with the examiners, but to say it would lose a mark on its own, I think that's pushing it. Really, I have been saying this time and time again. Examiners mark you by what you have done correctly, they don't specifically look for stuff to penalise you. In the end, just play by the game and try not to do something outrageous.
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