ATAR Notes: Forum
General Discussion => General Discussion Boards => Other General Discussion => Topic started by: Fluttershy on August 29, 2012, 11:08:21 am
-
So my grandparents are really keen on me doing medicine. I mean REALLY keen. They've been on to me about it for about 4-5 years now, and it's not showing any signs of stopping. Every time I met them in the 3-4 months before the UMAT, they pressured me to study more, to do more practice exams, and before the UMAT, they rang me 3 or 4 times to make sure I had all my stuff. Then, straight afterwards, my grandfather rang me to ask about how I went, and got mad when I didn't answer until about 20 minutes later because I was eating lunch. When I told him I probably didn't go so well he just ignored me and asked when I'd get my results.
Now he's already researching university options for med for me even though I've told him numerous times I'm not interested in it.
He also reckons I'm going to get a Premier's Award for English and has been bragging to all of his friends about me. He doesn't seem to understand that I don't want the attention, or that I'm not going to live up to his expectations. I just find it absolutely ridiculous how some parents or relatives, especially the Asian ones, are so hell-bent on their kids achieving these scores. ;)
So how far have you known parents or relatives to go in their quest to see other kids succeed to such an extent in their families? Just curious!
-
I told my parents it was their fault for raising me in a Western Country. Problem solved.
-
I HATE repetitiveness of any kind and if my grandparents/parents or whatever did that kind of crap for too long I would've cracked it and just told them to shove their ideas up their asses.
But then again I have a brother who would support me for a while after my family eventually throws me out on the street xD
-
My parents are very understanding they respect the choices that I make and don't force me into any career (the pressure that I face due to VCE is self imposed). But they do want me to choose a lucrative and comfortable career so that I may live an easy life, which usually involves going into tertiary studies..
-
My grandparents want me to become a dentist. I gave up on that idea (and told them too) because I just wasn't into it. This is when I was in year 10. Since then, they have wanted me to do it.
But in the end, I don't really care. Its my life, and I shall live however I want.
-
i've been grooming my parents for years telling them i'm just gonna be a bum and live on their couch for ever and ever. so when i tell them i'm keen on going to uni and getting a job they'll be pleasantly surprised !
-
My grandparent (only 1 grandmother left :( ) really wants me to do Medicine, but it's more to the point of comedy than seriousness. Like, she'll say "so you don't want to do medicine? Damn. So long as you're doing what makes you happy", but then the next time I see her the conversation will always come back to "so have you changed your mind and decided to do medicine yet?" lol.
-
My grandparent (only 1 grandmother left :( )
likewise.
-
*sigh*
you guys seem really lucky. Even my little brother's being hassled by my grandparents now about getting me to change my mind about doing medicine. Apparently a couple of weeks ago my grandfather cornered him when my parents went to visit their place (I was at Melbourne Uni Open Day) and interrogated him about whether he thought I would be a good doctor and whether I would be good at actuarial studies (which I want to do instead of med). I just feel that when other people are dragged into my affairs when they don't want to be involved, like my brother is at the moment, it's gone a bit far.
At least my mum's a lot more understanding, she actually encouraged me to look at other career choices because she knew I wouldn't be able to cope with the stress of being a doctor. :P
i've been grooming my parents for years telling them i'm just gonna be a bum and live on their couch for ever and ever. so when i tell them i'm keen on going to uni and getting a job they'll be pleasantly surprised !
SEEMS LIKE A PLAN
-
tbh i know people whose parents wanted them to be a doctor but they chose eng/comm, and i know people whose parents wanted them to be a doctor and they did it
usually, people arent happy with their choices if they dont like it and are forced into it, but everyone i know whose become a doctor, even though they didnt want, end up liking it, its one of those things you can really talk yourself into, helping people, good money, reputation, etc.
the people i know who ended up doing comm usually after graduation got a job, realised it was boring as fuq, were getting average pay, and wish they did med, some go back for MD's but most leave it too late and get stuck in a rut,
my suggestion? tell your grandpa you want to go to uom for more prestige and better employment prospects, but tell him how they only have post grad med, do commerce undergrad, fulfill premed requirements and make up your mind after your undergrad degree and see if actuarial studies is right for you
-
usually, people arent happy with their choices if they dont like it and are forced into it, but everyone i know whose become a doctor, even though they didnt want, end up liking it, its one of those things you can really talk yourself into, helping people, good money, reputation, etc.
I strongly disagree. Two cousins of mine were both pressured into doing Medicine by their parents. They didn't want to at the time, one wanted to do Law and the other a pure Maths degree. Both dislike their jobs, and from what I can tell it severely impacts on their enjoyment of life.
Don't expect that you can 'talk yourself into' a career. Sure, you might be able to, but if you can't, the better part of a decade of your life will be gone if you wait and see.
My advice is: do what you truly want to do.
-
usually, people arent happy with their choices if they dont like it and are forced into it, but everyone i know whose become a doctor, even though they didnt want, end up liking it, its one of those things you can really talk yourself into, helping people, good money, reputation, etc.
My advice is: do what you truly want to do.
I have a friend who has his parents pressuring him to a a dentist (he's curry too...), while his true passion (and you can bloody well see the talent he has) is in visual arts and design. He realised that he might not be able to generate a "decent" income by following his dream, and so eventually, now has given up. He's aiming for Dentistry and yet hasn't even done Chemistry or Maths Methods. His average for most his subjects (other than English) is a C+ to a B. Lets be serious, it is going to take him a long time to go with the path he has simultaneously chosen as well as pressured into. It honestly breaks my heart that this happens, and that he doesn't realise what he is doing. It's his own life he is playing with. Obviously, he should do something he enjoys, I mean you only live once. I don't mean to offend but:
Take control of your life
-
So are you a doctor yet?
-
So are you a doctor yet?
Me? No, I'm not into medicine.
-
haha, my aussie-grandma (only grandparent left) wanted me to choose arts to "explore the creative side of life" over commerce
im pretty sure my asian-grandma would've wanted me to do commerce or engineering, based on what most of my aunts/uncles do
I guess I just went both ways huh.
-
So are you a doctor yet?
Me? No, I'm not into medicine.
Talk to me when you doctor!!
-
Too much pressure is unhealthy.
Just let them know you are not interested in medicine, It's your life not theirs.
-
So are you a doctor yet?
Me? No, I'm not into medicine.
Haha no, I was just teasing the OP.
I think what you need to do is contemporise (had to create a word) your grandma. Show her the opportunities available in your fields of interest, and how these can even surpass medicine. Convince her that she should be proud of you excelling in something you love rather than doing 'OK' in medi.
-
So are you a doctor yet?
Me? No, I'm not into medicine.
Talk to me when you doctor!!
I think you mean, "when you are a doctor" :P
And no, I don't think that will happen.
-
In all seriousness, you have to select the profession that you want to do. Yeah med/dent is a stable/safe/accomplishing/brag worthy option, but I wouldn’t want to be stuck in a profession day in day out doing something I hated. Besides, I also wouldn’t want to hate my parents and grannies for the rest of my life for pressuring me into something I didn’t even want to do in the first place. So I guess my advice is ditch the family pride and make yourself happy. You only live once. YOLO (ew hate that word)
-
I mean you only live once.
sneaky yolo LOL
-
Why do people care what they're parents or grandparents think it's your life - seriously am I the only who has this philosophy?
I know you want to make them feel 'proud' and 'happy' but you're not living for them..