ATAR Notes: Forum
VCE Stuff => VCE English Studies => VCE Subjects + Help => VCE English Work Submission and Marking => Topic started by: leona0123 on February 16, 2011, 05:12:50 pm
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This is the first cartoon analysis I have ever done, so I wasn't sure what to write and it might be a bit under detailed. Also, could someone please take a look at my Week 1 February essay as I have received no feedback on it so far. Thanks!
In the first cartoon, Mark Knight is making a statement about the ineffectiveness of the Myki system and the apparent ignorance of the government towards this issue. The image shows Terry Mulder, the Minister for Public Transport and Roads, inspecting an out of service Myki machine at a city train station. The fact that the machine is broken is emphasised by the hundreds of ounorganised wires seen spilling out of it, and also the inclusion of the text ‘Out of Service’ on the machine’s screen. Mulder is shown wearing a suit and dress shoes, making him appear out of place in the position he is shown in. The comment in Mulder’s speech bubble has a tone of realisation, and it appears that this is his first actual experience with the Myki system in its intended environment. These two factors highlight that the government really has no first-hand knowledge of the system it has put in place and the issues that it is creating for commuters.
In the second cartoon, Knight is addressing the issue of corrupt authority figures, in this case ticket inspectors. The image is of a train station platform, one commuter and two ticket inspectors. Knight shows the ticket inspectors as huge, surly-looking men dressed in long, black coats with threatening facial expressions. They appear intimidating and frightening compared to the thin, frail-looking commuter depicted on the left. This puts the viewer in a position to see the commuter as being victimised, and therefore Knight’s point of view becomes apparent. The sign on the wall is slightly humorous but also straight-forward in conveying its intended message: that there is no effort being made by the government to ensure that ticket inspectors do not abuse their power, and that they will listen to complaints but not necessarily do anything about them. This makes it seem as though commuters are on their own when it comes to dealing with any issues that may arise, which is further emphasised by the lack of other people at the train station in the image.
Knight’s third cartoon deals with the issue of the Labor Government’s National Broadband Network plans, something that he is clearly opposed to. The image shows Prime Minister Julia Gillard addressing the media, while a young boy dressed in St. Kilda merchandise is sitting at a computer with a shocked expression on his face. Prime Minister Gillard’s features have largely been exaggerated as a way of ridiculing her personally as well as her government’s plans. The tone of the speech bubble is sarcastic, highlighting Knight’s belief that the NBN serves no useful purpose and also making the viewer question the credibility of Prime Minister Gillard’s reasoning. The fairly humorous image of the boy on the left is an illustration of the text in the speech bubble, serving to mock the Prime Minister further. The smaller caption in the right hand corner ridicules the government’s decision-making, and implies that the NBN has more negative aspects than positive aspects.
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In the first cartoon, Mark Knight is making a statement about the ineffectiveness of the Myki system and the apparent ignorance of the government towards this issue. The image shows Terry Mulder, the Minister for Public Transport and Roads, inspecting an out of service Myki machine at a city train station. The fact that the machine is broken is emphasised by the hundreds of ounorganisedYou mean disorganized? wires seen spilling out of itwordy, You could seperate these two ideas, as the out of service could symbolize something else?and also the inclusion of the text ‘Out of Service’ on the machine’s screen. Mulder is shown wearing a suit and dress shoes, making him appear out of place in the position he is shown in How does it position the reader then?. The comment in Mulder’s speech bubble has a tone of realisation, and it appears that this is his first actual experience with the Myki system in its intended environment intended environment? Ambivalent about this, could be subjective. These two factors highlight that the government really has no first-hand knowledge of the system it has put in place and the issues that it is creating for commuters Good!.
In the second cartoon, Knight is addressing the issue of corrupt authority figures, in this case ticket inspectors. The image is of a train station platform, one commuter and two ticket inspectors. Knight shows the ticket inspectors as huge, surly-looking men dressed in long, black coats with threatening facial expressions. They appear intimidating and frightening compared to the thin, frail-looking commuter depicted on the left. This puts the viewer in a position to see the commuter as being victimised, and therefore Knight’s point of view becomes apparent . The sign on the wall is slightly humorous but also straight-forward in conveying its intended message: that there is no effort being made by the government to ensure that ticket inspectors do not abuse their power, and that they will listen to complaints but not necessarily do anything about them. This makes it seem as though commuters are on their own when it comes to dealing with any issues that may arise, which is further emphasised by the lack of other people lack of people* at the train station in the image.
Knight’s third cartoon deals with the issue of the Labor Government’s National Broadband Network plans, something that he is clearly opposed to. The image shows Prime Minister Julia Gillard addressing the media, while a young boy dressed in St. Kilda merchandise is sitting at a computer with a shocked expression on his face. Prime Minister Gillard’s features have largely been exaggerated as a way of ridiculing her personally elaborate on personally abit, by explaining it, I don't really like it. Subjective though as well as her government’s plans. The tone of the speech bubble is sarcastic, highlighting Knight’s belief that the NBN serves no useful purpose and also making the viewer question the credibility of Prime Minister Gillard’s reasoning. The fairly humorous image of the boy on the left is an illustration of the text in the speech bubble, serving to mock the Prime Minister further Perhaps put some of the quotes, abit tad confusing, amidst all the explanation without evidence. The smaller caption in the right hand corner ridicules the government’s decision-making, and implies that the NBN has more negative aspects than positive aspects that it promotes.
Overall: Comment: These are the language analysis essays that I"m looking for. Its concise, the sentences are not wordy and its straight to the point. Just some minor issues, the word length was abit short, and I"m sure you were aware of it as well. I would like to see some more effect, on how it affects or positions the reader possibly and perhaps delve more into explaining, such as the contrasting figures of the two big men opposed to the thin scared/nervous guy. What does it attempt to convey etc? Overall, I thought this was a very good essay.
Mark: 7.8 (8+ if it was polished up a bit with the noted above)
As you can see, I didn't edit much or do much to it. I reckon, its just that good! Perhaps use different word variations, but its something that not so important as your writing appears fluent. But AIM FOR MORE fluency!
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I'm not sure if you're meant to (I did) but for cartoon analysis, I think you need to have the effect on the reader as well :S. Although you kind of do have the effect of the technique, you don't actually relate it to the reader?