MHS Writing Topics + Essays + Advice XD

[pixelgraphicsful]

Hi!

I'm doing the the MHS selective exam next year and I want to start preparing now so I have a better chance of getting in.

The areas I wanted to focus on is writing so I've decided I would like to write an essay every day alternating from analytical to creative. Any suggestions for possible topics would be greatly appreciated.

I will post the essays I write here and any constructive criticism would be heavily appreciated.

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[ShikharDhawan]

Hi!

I'm doing the the MHS selective exam next year and I want to start preparing now so I have a better chance of getting in.

The areas I wanted to focus on is writing so I've decided I would like to write an essay every day alternating from analytical to creative. Any suggestions for possible topics would be greatly appreciated.

I will post the essays I write here and any constructive criticism would be heavily appreciated.

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when i get the exam i got the creative topic which (it was an image) was about a girl sitting in her room and looking out the window and the prompt was "What happens next?"
The analytical one was about "Should spectators be allowed in sporting matches despite the chaos they make?"
hope this helps
if you have any other questions "PM" me.

[pixelgraphicsful]

Hey!
Thanks so much for posting, I'll start writing the creative one now!
 

[pixelgraphicsful]

when i get the exam i got the creative topic which (it was an image) was about a girl sitting in her room and looking out the window and the prompt was "What happens next?"
The analytical one was about "Should spectators be allowed in sporting matches despite the chaos they make?"
hope this helps
if you have any other questions "PM" me.

wHEw!
I finally wrote the creative one, but it took me 17 minutes instead of 15 but here it is, with all the mistakes and muck-ups. XD

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Puffy white clouds amongst a dazzling blue sky created an inquisitive tone to the day. It was a beautiful day in Australia, I was at the perfect hour, the sun was roaring and the lush green grass covered the usually dull landscape.

"Leo!" a familiar voice called, I spun my head back to face my teacher, a quintessential grandma far past his prime.

"What did I just say?" he barked at me ferociously.

"Leo?" I stammered.

"No I was talking about how vibrant colours are crucial for a respectable painting." our 'teacher' shouted back. "What! Are you doing staring out into the window?" "How could nature be possibly more intriguing than beautiful artworks of schools?"

Scavenging my brain for a decent answer, nothing. I guess its time when sugar-coated lies won't get me anywhere. I will just have to appreciate the truth.

"Come here, sir I beg you to allow me to explain," I crossed my fingers.

"Look at the trees, do you see the venerable fellows? The stunning greenery that dominates this area has is in a colour that must reflect on your teachings sir. The birds, do you not see their playful fights and most of all the cute creature's chirp? I explained, more confidently.

"If this is not beauty, then I will never understand it." I added, expanding out my arms.

Our teacher took a deep breath and then finally, looked at me in the eyes and told me with a smile.

"I get it Leo, thanks for your enlightment," he told me joyfully.

That was a memory that I will keep with  me throughout my life.

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Wow, just realised how many mistakes I made after typing it. Well like again ;-) constructive criticism (or praise ) will be welcome.

[M_BONG]

Awesome piece! Really like it Obviously I'm not going to give a mark or anything, but I think that would score well because you have shown good vocabulary, grammar and (probably) answered the question/prompt.

Standard is not nice high for Selective Entrance piece by the way. Amazing if you wrote that in 17 mins and are in Year 8.

Good luck!

[pixelgraphicsful]

Hey guys, thanks for all your contributions and kind words. 

I finished one of your suggested essays and here it is 
Tell me how I went, I think it was ok, but I don't believe I addressed the issue directly though. Also I wrote this in like 17 minutes again and the timer rang when I just started my conclusion.

Also, if anybody is kind enough to tell me  Is the analytical essay like a discussion or is it just like the persuasive I decided to write. Really confused 

As always, constructive criticism (or just criticism  ) will be greatly appreciated.

Anywho, the topic was,
Should spectators be allowed in sporting events despite the chaos they make?

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If one was to walk into say, an australian football grand final today. You would find that it is littered with people cheering on for their preferred teams. It is a elatic and invigorating sight. Spectators in sporting events motivates the players, creates more controversy and attracts more attention to the city. Therefore, spectators should unambiguously be permitted in sporting events.

To start off, the excitement of the viewers will improve the performance of the players. Imagine thousands of people vouching for you, one would definitely be prone to play better as a whole. Having a more spectacular event will increase the amount of action on the court causing a more enjoyable experience for spectators.

In addition, letting fans watch the events will add to the popularity of the game. Having events where fans can see their idols in real life provides the fan with something amazing to look forward to. Having more devoted fans will provide the players with more money and fund the sporting companies.

Ultimately, permitting people to watch live events will heavily up the entertainment side of the city it is hosted in. Entertainment is a crucial part of a successful city in our modern society. A bigger population means a richer city that will increase the liveability of the particular place.

Prohibiting fans to spectate sporting events is a crazy idea that will decrease the performance of a sport, kill off funding for our beloved sporting organisations and lower the liveability of a city. Spectator should unequivocally be allowed to participate in sporting events.

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[ShikharDhawan]

In your analytical piece, you have done well, but remember to include at least one paragraph that is opposite to your desired opinion. For e.g. in this prompt is states that "

"Should spectators be allowed in sporting matches despite the chaos they make?"

which should suggest to you that the examiner is looks for your opinion as well as one paragraph which describes that why do spectators make chaos on sporting fields?
That's what i have learned.
Otherwise it was good and i tell you now you will have better chances than anyone to get into MHS if you continue to write essays like these and in the given 15 minutes. Don't freak out in the exam if you don't finish your essay just remember that over half of the 1000 people doing the exam will not finish their essays.

[pixelgraphicsful]

In your analytical piece, you have done well, but remember to include at least one paragraph that is opposite to your desired opinion. For e.g. in this prompt is states that "which should suggest to you that the examiner is looks for your opinion as well as one paragraph which describes that why do spectators make chaos on sporting fields?
That's what i have learned.
Otherwise it was good and i tell you now you will have better chances than anyone to get into MHS if you continue to write essays like these and in the given 15 minutes. Don't freak out in the exam if you don't finish your essay just remember that over half of the 1000 people doing the exam will not finish their essays.

Thanks so much for your feedback, I concur with your advice. B)
So, would I say like

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Spectators make the chaos and noise because they are trying to motivate the players into performing at their best.
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Or something like that??

Thanks!

[pixelgraphicsful]

Hey Guys! 

Finished my creative writing!
Time taken was about 16 minutes.
The prompt was taken from this site
http://www.slideshare.net/kevcummins/150-amazing-writing-prompts-pictures

My plot wasn't the best and I added the small twist at the end, but I don't know if it is appropriate or will be considered as a cliché. 
I'm not sure but I think I made a mistake with the tenses. Can anybody verify that???

Well Here it is, hope you like it, this is what I actually wrote in 16 mins without modifications, although it was really hard to resist changing some obvious errors. XD
And as always, helpful suggestions are always welcome 

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SNAP! A gigantic crocodile emerged from the murky water, making an attempt to chomp at my legs. RAWR! The magnificent beast striked again, barely missing my defenceless body. Shocked with fear and panic, I made a reach for something to throw.

Nothing, nothing, yes, an orange. I jumped up and just as the crocodile attacked again, hurled the orange with all my might. Plop! A remorseful splash could be heard from the lake. I had completely missed! Or rather the creature had dodged it swiftly. There was a deadly silence that polluted the atmosphere with a dreadful feeling. I sidled over to the back of my wooded boat and planned my next move.

My lungs were burning and my head was flying faster than I could ever imagine. BOOM! The crocodile sprang from the water with a newsworthy leap right onto my shabby boat. Screaming with terror. I made a hail marry dash at the creatures eyes punching the left eye with all my might. The first thing I felt was pain, pure agony. The sensation left pain that killed me more than my car accident.

I suddenly realised my hand was still engulfed in the creature's eyelid. Shrieking with fear. I removed my had slowly.

The scent of blood from both parties was inevitably apparent as I viewed the damage I had caused. The beast was paralysed. as still as a statue. The crocodile fell over melodramatically back into the water. PLOOSH! The sound produced was oddly resonating. I stood up and adopting a theatrical pose, bowed down to the sky.

"Tom!" a familiar voice shouted, "Stop playing games and finish your homework."

I sighed deeply as I took off my headset and came to my senses in the real world. Guess I'll have to leave hunting until next time.
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THANKS SO MUCH FOR READING

[COLORS]

Hey Guys! 

Finished my creative writing!
Time taken was about 16 minutes.
The prompt was taken from this site
http://www.slideshare.net/kevcummins/150-amazing-writing-prompts-pictures

My plot wasn't the best and I added the small twist at the end, but I don't know if it is appropriate or will be considered as a cliché. 
I'm not sure but I think I made a mistake with the tenses. Can anybody verify that???

Well Here it is, hope you like it, this is what I actually wrote in 16 mins without modifications, although it was really hard to resist changing some obvious errors. XD
And as always, helpful suggestions are always welcome 

---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
SNAP! A gigantic crocodile emerged from the murky water, making an attempt to chomp at my legs. RAWR! The magnificent beast striked again, barely missing my defenceless body. Shocked with fear and panic, I made a reach for something to throw.

Nothing, nothing, yes, an orange. I jumped up and just as the crocodile attacked again, hurled the orange with all my might. Plop! A remorseful splash could be heard from the lake. I had completely missed! Or rather the creature had dodged it swiftly. There was a deadly silence that polluted the atmosphere with a dreadful feeling. I sidled over to the back of my wooded boat and planned my next move.

My lungs were burning and my head was flying faster than I could ever imagine. BOOM! The crocodile sprang from the water with a newsworthy leap right onto my shabby boat. Screaming with terror. I made a hail marry dash at the creatures eyes punching the left eye with all my might. The first thing I felt was pain, pure agony. The sensation left pain that killed me more than my car accident.

I suddenly realised my hand was still engulfed in the creature's eyelid. Shrieking with fear. I removed my had slowly.

The scent of blood from both parties was inevitably apparent as I viewed the damage I had caused. The beast was paralysed. as still as a statue. The crocodile fell over melodramatically back into the water. PLOOSH! The sound produced was oddly resonating. I stood up and adopting a theatrical pose, bowed down to the sky.

"Tom!" a familiar voice shouted, "Stop playing games and finish your homework."

I sighed deeply as I took off my headset and came to my senses in the real world. Guess I'll have to leave hunting until next time.
---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

THANKS SO MUCH FOR READING

Wow. You're, like, 1000090290x better than I was with creative writing a year ago. Keep doing this everyday until your exams and you'll smash it!

You have some good vocab here. Just make sure you're using them in the appropriate context though. ["A remorseful splash".] "Remorseful" doesn't seem like the right word to use. What are you trying to describe?

Your description is super, super awesome. I could imagine it all in my head. Keep it up!

As for your ending, it's a bit anticlimactic. Really similar to the "it was all a dream" conclusion. You haven't explored the POV character's emotions much in that last paragraph, so maybe instead try describing how he felt when he won?

This is really good for a 15 minute essay! Don't worry if your mind blanks out while you write! It happens. Nothing wrong with your tense btw.

Just wondering, are you in year 7 or 8?

[pixelgraphicsful]

Wow. You're, like, 1000090290x better than I was with creative writing a year ago. Keep doing this everyday until your exams and you'll smash it!

You have some good vocab here. Just make sure you're using them in the appropriate context though. ["A remorseful splash".] "Remorseful" doesn't seem like the right word to use. What are you trying to describe?

Your description is super, super awesome. I could imagine it all in my head. Keep it up!

As for your ending, it's a bit anticlimactic. Really similar to the "it was all a dream" conclusion. You haven't explored the POV character's emotions much in that last paragraph, so maybe instead try describing how he felt when he won?

This is really good for a 15 minute essay! Don't worry if your mind blanks out while you write! It happens. Nothing wrong with your tense btw.

Just wondering, are you in year 7 or 8?

Hey! Thanks so much for your encouraging feedback XD
I totally understand what you mean by using the right adjectives, I was just very rushed at that moment and didn't want to pause to think. I'll definitely work on that

And btw, I'm in year 7 
If I was in year 8, I would be freaking out right now, cause the test would be like in 9 days 

[alchemy]

Very creative! Keep it up mate (y)

[pixelgraphicsful]

Here comes the bomb,
I cannot believe how much I failed today's persuasive piece. Groan.
Completely blanked out when I started the timer.
My ideas decided to take a holiday, had no good ideas except for the average student ones.
Probably shouldn't have wrote this at 9:30PM 

At this point, advice would be fantastic, but I understand if not everyone wants to be my temporary tutor. 

On a brighter note, I wrote this in 15 minutes so yay!
The topic was- Should school uniforms be compulsory?

Anyway, I hope you enjoy, I guess??
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Uniforms have been the tradition for countless schools. However, the occasional school, may foolishly allow casual clothing. School uniforms should definitely be compulsory because they create a better learning environment, reduces bullying and lowers the chance of a potentially dangerous practical joke. Therefore, I unambiguously believe that school uniforms should be made compulsory.

To start off, a school where students wear school uniform makes a more formal environment for students. Uniforms generate a feeling of formality, emphasising the point of school, to be educated. School uniforms will improve the students learning potential.

In addition, school uniforms will reduce stress on the students. Teenagers, especially girls, care a lot about how they look compared to others. Some parents might be richer than other students causing pressure on students to follow the expensive trends. Uniforms will effectively remove all possibilities of such peer pressure from surfacing.

Ultimately, school uniforms can be used for identification. In our society, some students take education for granted and may exploit free dress in possible pranks. If such an event occurs, it will prevent students from focusing on their school work. School uniforms will kill the possibility of dangerous pranks.

School uniforms should be compulsory because they create a better learning place, reduces stress on students and lowers the amount of pranks. School uniforms should undoubtedly not be allowed in schools.
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[Hannibal]

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Uniforms have been the tradition for countless schools. However, the occasional school, may foolishly allow casual clothing. School uniforms should definitely be compulsory because they create a better learning environment, reduces bullying and lowers the chance of a potentially dangerous practical joke. Therefore, I strongly unambiguously believe that school uniforms should be made compulsory.

To start off, a school where students wear school uniform makes creates a more formal environment to learn in for students. Uniforms generate a feeling of formality, emphasising the point objective of school, to become educated. School uniforms will improve the students learning potential.

In addition, school uniforms will reduce stress on the students. Teenagers, especially girls, care a lot about how they look compared to others. Some parents might be richer wealthierthan other students causing pressure on students to follow the expensive trends. Uniforms will effectively remove all possibilities of such peer pressure from surfacing.

Always use wealthier instead of richer

Ultimately, school uniforms can be used for identification. In our society, some students take education for granted and may exploit free dress in possible pranks. If such an event occurs, it will prevent students from focusing on their school work. School uniforms will kill the possibility of dangerous pranks.

School uniforms should be compulsory because they create a better learning place, reduces stress on students and lowers the amount of pranks. School uniforms should undoubtedly not (Maybe don't use a double negative)be allowed in schools.
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Hopefully that's alright. It's a really good essay and more than enough to get into MHS I reckon.

[pixelgraphicsful]

Hopefully that's alright. It's a really good essay and more than enough to get into MHS I reckon.

WOW....
I'm astounded into how much effort you've put into helping a stranger
Felicitations for invigorating my confidence and motivation
I've carefully looked through your corrections and taken some mental notes

Thanks for making the world a better place