Language Analysis Help

[kavmeh]

Hi everyone
I really need help on how to start a body paragraph in language analysis in an interesting way
I always seem to start my first body paragraph like "(Author's name) uses an array of persuasive language techniques but to put focus on his contention he uses...."
But I know that the assessor don't want students to start their responses like that I have read other essays but I still don't understand how to start it in an interesting way and how to weave the techniques together because I just write about one technique  and in the next sentence start to talk about another technique.
I am currently doing 2012  vcaa exam "Reading: the future"
Thanks

[heids]

Well, this depends a lot on your overall approach to language analysis.  How do you group your analysis?  It sounds like you analyse chronologically (?) and therefore each paragraph doesn't have an overall argument or focus.

Instead of thinking of it like a collection of random disconnected techniques, it can be better to group it into overall 'approaches' or 'arguments' - e.g. 'the author tries to make himself look reliable' or 'the author tries to make the opposition look silly' or 'the author tries to make real books look cool/exciting/nostalgic' or w/e.

So then I'd start a paragraph something like 'The author ridicules [the opposition, government, the school system, etc], presenting them as careless and ineffective.'  Then I'd dive into the ways he does this (e.g. through a mocking tone and particular words/phrases, through an anecdote that makes them look ridiculous, through juxtaposing them with something else), then how these impact how the audience views the opposition, and then how this impacts their view of the overall issue or contention.

I really recommend reading this and maybe this.

Definitely, how you started doesn't seem great because it's vague and non-specific - your aim should be to find the overall ways the author is trying to persuade the audience, and then simply explain what the author's trying to do.  Stop thinking about 'techniques' and 'contention' and other big English-y words, just think about how the author's trying to manipulate us and make us think about things, and why they're doing that.

Here are some half-decent examples:
'Initially, the author sets herself up as both trustworthy and generous, suggesting that she has the reader's wishes at heart rather than selfish reasons.'
'Presenting children as innocent and vulnerable, the author arouses fear that they are in danger.'
'Through presenting mathematics as an intriguing challenge that encourages problem solving, the author suggests that it is vital in the development of children's minds.

If this doesn't make any sense, feel free to post a piece in the Eng Work Submission and Marking board - I promise we won't judge, but that'll give us a starting point in where you're at.

[kavmeh]

Thank you for helping bangali_lok.
I'll definitely read through the link you've recommended. I'll write a language analysis and post it up so you can suggest what I need to do for improvement.

[EKK]

hey
just wondering for LA what would make a piece stand out to an examiner as awesome?
as in what would be the difference between a 9 and a 10 or 8 and a 9
thanks