"Why Chinese Mothers Are Superior"...... excuse me while I puke

[Mao]

          Interesting mini-discussion
 
   
           "Children who are coerced by parents end up "introjecting" their values – mechanically adopting them without understanding, out of fear and obedience, making them like hypnotised subjects who feel they have no volition."

http://www.guardian.co.uk/commentisfree/2011/jan/16/amy-chua-strict-chinese-parenting

I don't know about the validity of that viewpoint, but holy shit her daughters are smokin'. (inb4 ban)

One thing I do agree with is being firm and give the kids some pressure in their up-bringing. Whilst it is not always desirable to force your kids into doing everything you say, forcing them to do some things they don't like can teach self discipline, which I see as an attribute often lacking in the majority of the Western society that focuses so much more on freedom (and impulses).

[MuggedByReality]

  Mmmm. I'd want to impart to my unborn children that, if they are not doing as well as they'd like, in any area, it's up to them to take responsibility for bettering themselves.

[Bonifacio]

          Interesting mini-discussion
 
   
           "Children who are coerced by parents end up "introjecting" their values – mechanically adopting them without understanding, out of fear and obedience, making them like hypnotised subjects who feel they have no volition."

http://www.guardian.co.uk/commentisfree/2011/jan/16/amy-chua-strict-chinese-parenting

I don't know about the validity of that viewpoint, but holy shit her daughters are smokin'. (inb4 ban)

One thing I do agree with is being firm and give the kids some pressure in their up-bringing. Whilst it is not always desirable to force your kids into doing everything you say, forcing them to do some things they don't like can teach self discipline, which I see as an attribute often lacking in the majority of the Western society that focuses so much more on freedom (and impulses).

To be honest, I would respect Asians (not all obviously) in general a whole bunch more if 9.9/10 at my school didn't just look at education as a pathway to a high-paying job. It makes me think all this hard work and discipline is purely monetarily motivated.

[Cianyx]

if 9.9/10 at my school didn't just look at education as a pathway to a high-paying job.

Judging by the mechanics of the education system, it would not be an inadequate assumption at all.

[Bonifacio]

What has the education system got to do with it?

Asians that I know are generally are pushed super hard so that they can get high paying jobs. A quote from the head student of my school, "Why would I waste my time learning something not on the syllabus? Dad doesn't check what I'm learning just my grades...Medicine doesn't make much money apparently, I prefer Pharmacy."

[Cianyx]

The first section of your quote directly supports my statement. Also, your head student, who I'm assuming is Asian, doesn't sound like he's 'pushed super hard' into a 'high paying job'. He appears to be doing it voluntarily.

[uhmmaybe]

I don't like the parenting methods of some asians but I do understand that in their eyes they're doing the best for their kids and that they don't "know" any other way of parenting. But I did find it weird that the writer of the article raised her kids the way she did cus I've always assumed that first generation children of migrants in western countries would adopt a more lenient parenting style.

"By contrast, the Chinese believe that the best way to protect their children is by preparing them for the future, letting them see what they're capable of, and arming them with skills, work habits and inner confidence that no one can ever take away."

Her defense sounds really embellished cus it seems those children are just brought up to earn loads of money.

[ninwa]

Her defense sounds really embellished cus it seems those children are just brought up to earn loads of money.

She's a law professor at a top university, I bet she's awesome at "embellishing" (euphemism for spouting complete bullshit to support an untenable stance)

[Eriny]

I don't think it's all that reprehensible for money to be a major motivator. I take it that these parents are first or second generation migrants and still realise what poverty in China means (i.e. it's fairly devastating), they may still be anxious about that? Even if not, having different kinds of goals in life to others isn't necessarily a bad thing.

[david10d]

http://www.theage.com.au/entertainment/books/mommy-dearest--the-debate-over-hardline-parenting-20110129-1a90z.html

Interesting opinions from Chinese Australian parents.

[LOVEPHYSICS]

How can you guys say such horrible things about my aunt?

[Oakleaf]

As someone raised by a set of Chinese parents, this really is unusual(? I can't find the right word).

I've never had any kind of experience like this.

I play music because I want to. I play piano, because it's fun and sounds nice. I play flute because I thought it looked cool.
I want to become a biomedical engineer. My parents don't care what I do, as long as I earn enough to live.
I've done school musicals, I learn martial arts and I enjoy surfing.
I do well at school, but not because my parents want me to, but because my friends expect me to. And I hate disappointing myself when I know I can do better.

I've never been told off for my grades.

I've scanned through some of the links posted, and while intriguing, I felt disconcerted by how Asian parents were being portrayed. I guess I'm lucky.

Sorry for ranting, this just got a strong response from me emotionally.

[Eriny]

Well, its definitely true that the tiger mum thing is clearly a generalisation, not everyone will have the same experience.