Corrupt a wish

[lm21074]

Except I wouldn't want to. I only want to eat when I am hungry, so if I'm not hungry I won't be inclined to eat.
____________

They respond and everyone else stops responding.

I wish all the Firefox plugins would be brought to Chrome

They are, but they will crash.

I wish all the Chrome plugins would be brought to Microsoft Edge.

[Poet]

Except I wouldn't want to. I only want to eat when I am hungry, so if I'm not hungry I won't be inclined to eat.
____________

They respond and everyone else stops responding.

I wish all the Firefox plugins would be brought to Chrome

But when you happen to be "inclined to eat", you would not be able to. Come on, Rui. You're beginning reminding me of my 30 year old bachelor co-worker. 
___________________________

They are, but they will crash.

I wish all the Chrome plugins would be brought to Microsoft Edge.

They are, but they are introduced with a premium monthly subscription at an exorbitant amount.

I wish I could sleep in tomorrow.

[JTrudeau]

They are, but they are introduced with a premium monthly subscription at an exorbitant amount.

I wish I could sleep in tomorrow.

You find a cockroach on your pillow when you eventually wake up.

I wish eraser shavings didn't exist.

[Poet]

You find a cockroach on your pillow when you eventually wake up.

I wish eraser shavings didn't exist.

Cool. Erasers don't happen to exist either.
(Hey, pro tip: try and find a kneadable eraser (in literally any little art shop) - they don't leave shavings but work just as well as a normal one!)

I wish I was a little kid again (no need to do year 12 until ages into the future, amirite?!?)

[RuiAce]

Your age goes down but you lose all memories except the bad ones.

I wish I understood stuff more

[sweetiepi]

Your age goes down but you lose all memories except the bad ones.

I wish I understood stuff more

Granted
But then you have to read books

I wish I could speak more languages

[Poet]

Granted
But then you have to read books

I wish I could speak more languages

Of course, but you would forget how to read and write in any language.

I wish I could get free music without doing something illegal.

[lm21074]

Of course, but you would forget how to read and write in any language.

I wish I could get free music without doing something illegal.

You can, but it's music you absolutely hate.

I wish I had a stronger work ethic.

[JTrudeau]

You can, but it's music you absolutely hate.

I wish I had a stronger work ethic.

You do, but only for jobs with no career progression.

I wish I had more pages in my bullet journal.

[lm21074]

You do, but only for jobs with no career progression.

I wish I had more pages in my bullet journal.

You do, but when you write on it, your writing instruments stab the paper because it is so thin. (Also, thanks for reminding me to start my May setup!)

I wish assignments were more spread out this semester.

[Poet]

You do, but when you write on it, your writing instruments stab the paper because it is so thin. (Also, thanks for reminding me to start my May setup!)

I wish assignments were more spread out this semester.

They are, but there's more of them.

I wish school scanners actually worked.

[JTrudeau]

They are, but there's more of them.

I wish school scanners actually worked.

They do, but it takes 24 hours to finish scanning one page.

I wish programming was easier.

[RuiAce]

They do, but it takes 24 hours to finish scanning one page.

I wish programming was easier.

The programming becomes easier but everything becomes NP hard.

I wish I could function without sleep or oxygen

[sweetiepi]

The programming becomes easier but everything becomes NP hard.

I wish I could function without sleep or oxygen

but sleep is good!
Granted- but then you realise that you need a strange elixir to keep you alive

I wish I wasn't so lazy

[S200]

Done!
But now you can't stop running around and Berating others for their laziness.

I wish I could hold up time.