I'm not amazing at English but I decided to give this a critical read. This is the first time I’ve ever done this- hopefully you find it useful anyway!
Prompt: Owen's poetry presents an unfailing view of the soldiers as victims. Discuss.
Wilfred Owen's anthology 'The War Poems' demonstrates the traumatic experiences and conditions that soldiers had faced, at the Western Front. I would put in that’s its during World War One (1914-1917)…there shouldn’t be a comma before “at the western front”, it should just be ‘conditions that soldiers had faced at the Western Front.’ Owen argues that the horrendous experiences of the soldiers at war was quite contrary to the sanitised version of war where it was 'sweet and glorious to die for [one's] country’.You can mention that the government of the time was the main body that was really encouraging this idea! - you can look at the ideals of time, the whole British sense of a ‘fair fight’ and an adventure in war, as well as poets such as Miss Jessie Pope, who was the person Owen was referring to in ‘Dulce Et Decorum Est’ in the phrase “my friend, you would not tell with such high zest” Owen conveys the soldier's loss in their beliefs of war this is unclear-you can definitely add more, such as what beliefs they lost, and also their hope in life itself. Owen also outlines the devastating psychological impact that soldiers were experiencing, due to the carnage of war. I don’t know if you’ve realised that you’ve started every sentence (except the first sentence) with ‘Owen’. I think you can make it flow better if you say linking words like ‘additionally’ or ’furthermore’! Despite of all the trauma and hardships, Owen displays that there is a strong bond and a sense of compassion that soldiers show towards each other, which enables to believe enables who to believe? that even in times of grief, the victims of war would be willing to help each other recover. I really like this last idea that you’ve put in! Well done.
The introduction is pretty clear in the sense that I know what you’re going to be talking about in the rest of your essay, however as it is a text response essay you should definitely introduce HOW Owen presents these ideas through his poetry. That would be a sentence basically saying “Through the use of various poetic techniques, Wilfred Owen presents us an intimate view of the soldier’s rah rah rah rah”- Do you know what I mean?
It is Owen's ability to transport readers to the battlefield and submerge them into the true terror of the war, and challenge the social milieu of war being glorious, that clearly outlines that war rendered the soldiers as victims.Very very nice topic sentence. I had to look up what ‘milieu’ means, haha! I would try to find a different word for war though- you used it 3 times in one sentence. In 'The Sentry', the onomatopoeic expression of 'rain, guttering down' demands readers to hear the sound of rain and thunder, which may intimidate them, and give them a sense of what war was really like. Personally I would write this sentence like this…’hear the sound of rain and thunder, which may intimidate them, giving them a sense of what war was really like’The appeal to the sense of smell when the air was 'old and sour' paints an image of an old factory, which once again opposes the opinion of war being glorious. In 'Disabled', the man sitting in a 'wheeled chair' displays his dependence on wheels, and conveys that he can no longer use his own body to support himself. Sleep being personified as the 'mother' explains the young man's grim reality - that sleep takes care of him, and is his only escape from his 'disabled' life. Moreover, the use of 'dark' and 'grey' establish the dim and lifeless mood of this poem, and perhaps the soldier's life. The first stanza being contrasted with the second strongly shows that the soldier is a victim of war - the use of alliteration 'When glow lamps budded in the light blue tree' captures the 'gay' and colourfulness of the nature of his life. However, Owen conveys that he will 'never feel how slim girls' waists' are anymore, which signifies that he is denied the right of love, despite of his age, and what he has lost. Lastly, it is the depressing second stanza of 'S.I.W' which challenges the the you used ‘the’ twice!!! norm at the time, of it being sweet and glorious to die. The authorities finding the 'English ball' inside what seemed to be a wounded soldier in fact indicated that the soldier had shot himself, in order to escape from the egregious conditions of war. Okay. So that was a lot of evidence, which is good, but I feel like you haven’t really explained enough! I would put more linking sentences! Otherwise, really good, because you have a range of techniques from different poems. I think good words to use in this paragraph would be: undermining, question or dispute
Owen is in fact the most depressing Like, do you mean Owen himself is being depressing? Or his writing takes a depressed tone? when he reveals that not only had soldiers were victims of the disturbing war re: when he reveals that not only had soldiers been the true victims of the disturbing war, they also lost hope in the government (NOT THE WAR, because it was the government that encouraged them), but they lost their hope in war and also their religion, do you mean they lost faith in God himself? and more profoundly their belief in life itself. It is in the octet of 'Anthem for doomed youth' when Owen uses a combination of alliteration and onomatopoeia 'rapid rattle' that allow re: allows the reader to readers to hear the savage firing of guns, at their funeral 'bells'. I'm not sure what you mean by the last bit...Owen argues that the 'prayers and bells' that the Christian tradition had established would in fact be a 'mockery' to them, which signifies the loss of faith of the soldiers. It is the poem 'Futility' that conveys Owen's view that the nature of war is incompatible with religion. You can discuss Wilfred Owen’s religious background here- he worked in a church for a bit…
There’s a letter that he sent to his mother in May 1917, he said:
Greater love hath no man than this, that a man lay down his life- for a friend.
Is it spoken in English only and French?
I do not believe so.
Thus you see how pure Christianity will not fit in with pure patriotism
Referencing Genesis 1, where God had created the world, the line 'was it for this there clay grew tall' questions the point of war, and the very purpose of life - if man is going to die, why create him in the first place? Though 'Futility' is structured as very tender and gentle, it still allows for the reader to pick up the underlying message, which is that there is absolutely no point in life, if it is all going to be wasted in the end - 'O what made fatuous sunbeams toil, To break earth's sleep at all?’ A very good line to use for this paragraph would be the first line of ‘Mental Cases’- ‘Who are these? Why sit they here in twilight?- these soldiers definitely lost their lives, although they are not yet dead.
It is Owen's disturbing depiction of the psychological damage that soldiers had experienced during war that unequivocally demonstrates that the soldiers are the victims of war. Very nicely written. In the unsettling poem 'Mental Cases', the statement of the soldiers 'rock[ing]' suggests that the soldier is still recovering from shell shock. Alluding to biblical imagery, the 'purgatorial shadows' signify that these soldiers are in between heaven and hell, waiting to die. The men 'witness[ing]' 'multitudinous murders' may perhaps explain why 'sunlight [seems] a blood smear' - they no longer see beauty within the world, but are instead reminded of their traumatic experiences that took place in the trenches. The disconcerting image that is painted within readers' heads when the soldiers 'pluck' at each other signifies that they are affected to such an extent that they fight each other, much like monkeys. It is perhaps the last line of Mental Cases, 'Pawing us who dealt them war and madness', that captures the underlying message of the poem - the authorities of war were responsible disruption of the soldiers' well being, and consequently 'gave [the soldiers] hell' (The Sentry). In addition, Owen displays that normal, fully functional soldiers are also very capable of being psychologically affected. In 'Dulce et decorum est', the soldier recalls 'In all my dreams, before my helpless sight; he plunges at me, guttering, choking, drowning,' which indicates that the soldier has nightmares about watching his fellow solider die. The couplet also paints a vividly disturbing picture of a man suffering excruciatingly and dying painfully. You can talk about the juxtaposition of the reality and the dream…In the first three stanzas, Owen spoke about it as though it was happening right at that moment…he finishes with “as under a green sea, I saw him drowning.” then goes right into “In all my dreams, before my helpless sight, // He plunges at me, guttering, choking, drowning”. It was almost as if Owen is not able to discern reality from his dreams anymore, because they’re both so horrific. That can definitely be a evidence of psychological damage.The fact that the poem is vividly recreated for the reader, not only with the visual imagery but the aural imagery (the assonance in ‘guttering, choking, drowning’) suggest that soldiers relive these horrors all the time- they literally cannot forget the experience. You can also speak about the fact that Mental Cases was based on the soldiers that Owen encountered during his stay at Craiglockhart. Also, another word for shell-shock is neurasthenia! I read it somewhere in my copy of 'War Poems'
Despite the fact that the soldiers' beliefs about almost everything had been lost, they continued to hold their compassion and comradery Re: camaraderie- I looked it up on the dictionary, apparently we’ve both been spelling it ‘wrong’ all these years and no one bothered to tell us, but it’s interchangeable- the preferred spelling is the latter for each other, for the purpose of helping each other recover from the war. In 'The Sentry', the soldier addresses his superior as 'Sir', which showed that loyalty is always present, even within the worst of times. The superior giving hope to the soldier by letting him know that if 'he could see the least blurred light', he was 'not blind', which further displayed the compassion and support that the soldiers fed each other with, as victims of war. In 'Dulce et decorum est', the soldier yelling 'Gas! Gas! Quick boys' shows the comradery and support that had failed to leave the soldiers, unlike everything else. Additionally, the very powerful line in 'Strange Meeting', 'I am the enemy you killed, my friend' predominantly suggests that it was completely possible for two enemies on the battlefield to show forgiveness for each other, despite who or what they are fighting for. Very nice, very concise and very informative. Honestly, I thought you would talk more about ‘Strange Meeting’ because the entire poem is literally about this idea of camaraderie! I like this paragraph very very much!
Ultimately, it is Owen's ability of enabling the readers to utilise their five senses, and his ability of painting vivid pictures in readers' heads which makes them read his poems at an uncomfortable distance. He predominantly accentuates the macabre re: macabre nature of war of war, and challenges the 'old lie' that it is 'sweet and glorious' to die for one's country. The disheartening poems such as 'Futility' and 'Anthem for doomed youth' which convey the loss of hope, faith, and more profoundly life itself, which truly and unfailingly render the soldiers as victims. It is also, the long term psychological damage that was caused by war exposes the true and unseen terror of war, and consequently the disturbing side effects that a soldier may have, that deem the soldiers as victims. While the soldiers are clearly the victims of war, their genuine compassion and support for one and other as they attempt to give each other 'hope' are what makes them one step closer to their recovery. Brief and sweet conclusion.
All in all, really good job on this piece! You have so many pieces of evidence, I am impressed. I would recommend that you work on key pieces of vocabulary and read up on the social and historical context in which Owen wrote his work in. That’s prevalent themes of the day- femininity VS masculinity, propaganda. Learn who Owen was, and how that affected his work. Look into his influences- the suffusion of Romantic flourishes from Keats and Shelley, and the dose of shocking realism and typified modernist writing from Siegfried Sassoon. You can definitely create a high-scoring essay. Again, hope this helps!