im about to get into 2nd yr 2nd sem and im just fed up with doing assignments/prepping for exam doubting over whether I'm doing things right or not. Even though I can survive till now its due to hours and hours fed up of research online and asking people in yahoo answers or stack exchange about whether im correct or not with my method while i can use that time to catch up with lectures. My counselor said that a way start is to approach and introduce yourself to your neighbour at your first lecture. but all I see is they chatting with their inner circle and I got pressured already. anyone used to be at my position (no friends at all) and finally got few friends who can be their friend at uni where they can actually discuss subject stuff and serious with assignments and not about other stuff? What did you do? How did you know that that guy/girl you become friends with is serious with the subjects?
I'm not a social psychologist but this is what I know from my experience. I was pretty much an introvert until year 9. Never really had any real friends, nor did I ever try to make any. Kept everything to myself; woke up, went to school, came back, studied a bit and repeat. I was always too scared to talk to people, scared that I would awkward, afraid that I would do something that would make the other person uncomfortable or simply that the other person wouldn't like me. I spoke a lot at home but never really at school. My family and I then moved to Australia and that is when I made a commitment to myself that I'd start talking to people, try to make friends and participate more in class. My first school, in Australia, was BSC. At first the students looked aloof (not friendly and distant) but it was when I started talking to them I realized that it was all in my head. I made heaps of friends and even had few best mates that I am still in contact with despite changing schools this year (almost chat/talk to them on a regular basis). Luckily I got in a selective high school in Melbourne and made heaps of friends over there as well. I applied the same tactic; took initiative, I was friendly and open and when the time was right (knew them well enough), connected with them genuinely (talked to them everyday (whether over social media or in person), went out with them etc).
In conclusion, I suggest you consider the following:
1) You think they're aloof but in reality, it's all in your head.
2) Take the first initiative (some people may think you're the one trying to distance yourself and may not take the first step so you go ahead and take it)
3) Be friendly and open (and not distant)
4) Just be yourself. Don't make friends that ask you to change (some do).
I wish you best of luck and REMEMBER THAT FEAR, IT'S ALL IN YOUR HEAD.
P.S Here's a meme to make you laugh
Home
Help
Search
Login
