atar-dating 'discussion'?!

[fuzzylogic]

Okay, so I couldn't think of a better title for this topic...but today I was at my dad's shop and two guys were waiting for haircuts and talking about girls and I totaaalllly wasn't eavesdropping but one goes verbatim "nah bro, I like her, but couldn't possibly ask her out, she got a higher atar than me.  not cool." 
 Left me awestruck and also reminded me of what my (curry) mother always says about a lot of men (while she was growing up) not wanting to marry a girl who's more qualified/had higher education/done better in uni than them....what do people think?   Just thought it might be an interesting topic for discussion...

[aes_999]

Most people don't really ask about ATAR scores
when they're in uni. 

But yeah, ur mum is spot on.
Guys can sometimes have a complex about
not wanting to marry someone who's more qualified
or has a higher education than them.
Makes them feel inferior in the household.
But that's just my opinion.

[ShortBlackChick]

LOL Anyone remember last time?

[fuzzylogic]

LOL Anyone remember last time?

what happened last time?

[Zafaraaaa]

OMG that is exactly what my mum says as well! LOL I think to some extent it may be true...I've seen some guys (like family friends) who get intimidated if their potential wife is like a doctor or something (while they're not) - sometimes to the extent of not even marrying them! :O So unfair, I know, but I think most guys (but not all) just want to feel more superior on academic terms, since they're (usually) the main earners of the household

[enwiabe]

LOL Anyone remember last time?

I'm handing out bans if the discussion heads that way again.

[EvangelionZeta]

I can imagine a lot of people having inferiority complex issues - I think gender shouldn't (and hopefully eventually won't) come into play though.  (:

Also, ignoring VCE, I  think it's probably healthier in a relationship if the couple isn't in direct competition with one another in an academic/professional sense.  I've heard of med couples where gradually, the boyfriend/girlfriend have developed a complex of needing to keep up with, or even beat the other person in the relationship. 

With VCE, I think the ATAR shouldn't really matter, although I can imagine it might hurt if you were doing all the same subjects and the other person was just better (gender aside).  nisha's right on the money.

[Special At Specialist]

I hear about heaps of people not wanting to marry people of a lower class/academic level than them, but I never hear about people not wanting to "move up" so to speak.

[fuzzylogic]

I can imagine a lot of people having inferiority complex issues - I think gender shouldn't (and hopefully eventually won't) come into play though.  (:

Also, ignoring VCE, I  think it's probably healthier in a relationship if the couple isn't in direct competition with one another in an academic/professional sense.  I've heard of med couples where gradually, the boyfriend/girlfriend have developed a complex of needing to keep up with, or even beat the other person in the relationship. 

With VCE, I think the ATAR shouldn't really matter, although I can imagine it might hurt if you were doing all the same subjects and the other person was just better (gender aside).  nisha's right on the money.

I wholly agree that gender shouldn't and hopefully won't come into play.  However, like zafaraaa I've seen too many guy family friends break up with fiancees/wives/girlfriends who have decided to pursue higher education etc, yet haven't seen many...or any girls feel 'inferior' when their partners have done the same.  Also, the other day my aunt told her daughter not to  bother doing a masters because it would 'hinder chances of getting a husband'.  :|
Of course, not saying that this is always the case, as I've also seen some very supportive and wholesome relationships.   
maybe it is the whole historically men have been breadwinners, or the ones who got educated and thus 'superior'...a notion that wouldn't exist in an ideal world lol...I guess it just worries me and my inner feminist when I hear people of our generation and our age making such comments.

[abd123]

This is more of an Arabian and Asian Culture, right? Womens won't have as much right as men do within the Arabian/Asian culture. For example in Saudi Arabia womens can't drive cars, only their husbands or partner or a male sibling could do the driving for them, its quite restrictive as oppose to the western culture. Females under those cultures are taught to be very submissive to their male counterparts and to not blow their ego's away.

As for a male worrying about their female counterparts being a lot more qualified than they are then there egos will be blown away and destroyed. We all know that men have bigger ego's than women's and the ego men have are very sensitive as oppose to their female counterparts, and your mum is right about 'men not being with a female partner that are a lot more qualified than they are'.

Don't worry about it to much , your living in a western society, so women in western cultures have way more rights than the womens that are in ethnic cultures or different backgrounds, and that are living outside of e.g. Aus, Nz, UK, USA and Canada-Western areas. You may have encountered with those 'guys whom wish to supress an independant womens life'-those guys are equivalent to being a complete jerk, but dont worry about it there will be great guys out there that wants to be with you, it wouldn't matter if there qualified as you or not thats only if they are truly in love with you

[EvangelionZeta]

I can imagine a lot of people having inferiority complex issues - I think gender shouldn't (and hopefully eventually won't) come into play though.  (:

Also, ignoring VCE, I  think it's probably healthier in a relationship if the couple isn't in direct competition with one another in an academic/professional sense.  I've heard of med couples where gradually, the boyfriend/girlfriend have developed a complex of needing to keep up with, or even beat the other person in the relationship. 

With VCE, I think the ATAR shouldn't really matter, although I can imagine it might hurt if you were doing all the same subjects and the other person was just better (gender aside).  nisha's right on the money.

I wholly agree that gender shouldn't and hopefully won't come into play.  However, like zafaraaa I've seen too many guy family friends break up with fiancees/wives/girlfriends who have decided to pursue higher education etc, yet haven't seen many...or any girls feel 'inferior' when their partners have done the same.  Also, the other day my aunt told her daughter not to  bother doing a masters because it would 'hinder chances of getting a husband'.  :|
Of course, not saying that this is always the case, as I've also seen some very supportive and wholesome relationships.   
maybe it is the whole historically men have been breadwinners, or the ones who got educated and thus 'superior'...a notion that wouldn't exist in an ideal world lol...I guess it just worries me and my inner feminist when I hear people of our generation and our age making such comments.

Social progression darling, social progression.  We just need to keep the feminist movement alive, and relevant (and not overzealous and/or misinterpreted, urgh).

[fuzzylogic]

I can imagine a lot of people having inferiority complex issues - I think gender shouldn't (and hopefully eventually won't) come into play though.  (:

Also, ignoring VCE, I  think it's probably healthier in a relationship if the couple isn't in direct competition with one another in an academic/professional sense.  I've heard of med couples where gradually, the boyfriend/girlfriend have developed a complex of needing to keep up with, or even beat the other person in the relationship. 

With VCE, I think the ATAR shouldn't really matter, although I can imagine it might hurt if you were doing all the same subjects and the other person was just better (gender aside).  nisha's right on the money.

I wholly agree that gender shouldn't and hopefully won't come into play.  However, like zafaraaa I've seen too many guy family friends break up with fiancees/wives/girlfriends who have decided to pursue higher education etc, yet haven't seen many...or any girls feel 'inferior' when their partners have done the same.  Also, the other day my aunt told her daughter not to  bother doing a masters because it would 'hinder chances of getting a husband'.  :|
Of course, not saying that this is always the case, as I've also seen some very supportive and wholesome relationships.   
maybe it is the whole historically men have been breadwinners, or the ones who got educated and thus 'superior'...a notion that wouldn't exist in an ideal world lol...I guess it just worries me and my inner feminist when I hear people of our generation and our age making such comments.

Social progression darling, social progression.  We just need to keep the feminist movement alive, and relevant (and not overzealous and/or misinterpreted, urgh).

why is social progression so slow, darling, why so slow?   

[EvangelionZeta]

I can imagine a lot of people having inferiority complex issues - I think gender shouldn't (and hopefully eventually won't) come into play though.  (:

Also, ignoring VCE, I  think it's probably healthier in a relationship if the couple isn't in direct competition with one another in an academic/professional sense.  I've heard of med couples where gradually, the boyfriend/girlfriend have developed a complex of needing to keep up with, or even beat the other person in the relationship. 

With VCE, I think the ATAR shouldn't really matter, although I can imagine it might hurt if you were doing all the same subjects and the other person was just better (gender aside).  nisha's right on the money.

I wholly agree that gender shouldn't and hopefully won't come into play.  However, like zafaraaa I've seen too many guy family friends break up with fiancees/wives/girlfriends who have decided to pursue higher education etc, yet haven't seen many...or any girls feel 'inferior' when their partners have done the same.  Also, the other day my aunt told her daughter not to  bother doing a masters because it would 'hinder chances of getting a husband'.  :|
Of course, not saying that this is always the case, as I've also seen some very supportive and wholesome relationships.   
maybe it is the whole historically men have been breadwinners, or the ones who got educated and thus 'superior'...a notion that wouldn't exist in an ideal world lol...I guess it just worries me and my inner feminist when I hear people of our generation and our age making such comments.

Social progression darling, social progression.  We just need to keep the feminist movement alive, and relevant (and not overzealous and/or misinterpreted, urgh).

why is social progression so slow, darling, why so slow?   

Wait until we're the old generation.  (:

[pi]

Wait a minute, since when was EZ female?

Moderator action: removed real name, sorry for the inconvenience

[b^3]

Wait a minute, since was EZ female?

You're covers blown EZ!

EDIT: I don't seee why it should be a problem, we should be happy if our partner is successful, but then I suppose it does depend on the circumstances for some.

Moderator action: removed real name, sorry for the inconvenience