Parent got diagnosed with terminal cancer - continue to YR 12 exams or quit?

[Furbob]

I have a good friend whose father was diagnosed with bowel cancer last year in year 12 and she did have a breakdown period where she was hiding in empty rooms  crying silently in a corner and not attending class for a while .... and it was very heartbreaking to see since I couldn't do much as a friend apart from offering a shoulder to cry on

however she did keep strong throughout year 12 and managed to get a 92.8 ATAR despite having SEAS support and all
Her dad was very proud of her for pulling through and having a daughter he could be proud of both academically and for her strong-will
(sadly he passed away a few months ago )

just a story I'd like to share - although since the news has broke so recently for you I can see that you might need some time like my friend did *hugs all round*

[StumbleBum]

i just basically told them my situation and asked where i can acess the application form. The guy i spoke to was like "yeah, look you can only apply through your school and only AFTER you sit your exams" and he's like that i'd find out if my application is approved a couple of weeks before i find out my atar score. so now its a matter of i have to sit my exams because i'm not even sure i'll get approved.

Wow, that is a terrible process IMO. They are basically forcing you to do the exams and study for them because they won't tell you if your approved beforehand. I can see where they are coming from that they would want to encourage everyone to still sit the exams, but in turn they are just putting unnecessary pressure on you in a time when you certainly don't need anything else to worry about.

[brenden]

If you want me to I'll call up VCAA tomorrow and push them. If ninwa says it's bullshit then that's bullshit enough to me. I have spares period 4 and 5 so I'll do a little bit of research myself and go in equipped.

[ninwa]

Do you want someone to call up for you? enwiabe is great at scaring people into acquiescing to his demands... :p

[betruetoyou22]

I have a good friend whose father was diagnosed with bowel cancer last year in year 12 and she did have a breakdown period where she was hiding in empty rooms  crying silently in a corner and not attending class for a while .... and it was very heartbreaking to see since I couldn't do much as a friend apart from offering a shoulder to cry on

however she did keep strong throughout year 12 and managed to get a 92.8 ATAR despite having SEAS support and all
Her dad was very proud of her for pulling through and having a daughter he could be proud of both academically and for her strong-will
(sadly he passed away a few months ago )

just a story I'd like to share - although since the news has broke so recently for you I can see that you might need some time like my friend did *hugs all round*

i can totally relate to her ;/ my breakdown period was for the past three weeks. there was one day where i literally didn't get out of bed. but i gues if your friend could do it then so could i

[betruetoyou22]

If you want me to I'll call up VCAA tomorrow and push them. If ninwa says it's bullshit then that's bullshit enough to me. I have spares period 4 and 5 so I'll do a little bit of research myself and go in equipped.

i called them up AGAIN lol and they put me through to the same moron that i spoke to yesterday. he changed his mind today and told me that i could apply through vcaa but that i could only do it after i sat the exams. So i guess i'm going to continue studying and i'm going to sit the exams. "courage is going on, even when you don't have the strength to"

i don't think i have any other option. he's like my only other option is resitting unit 4 next year! such a prick he was.

[betruetoyou22]

Do you want someone to call up for you? enwiabe is great at scaring people into acquiescing to his demands... :p

Loll ninwa! you da bomb. is there anything enwiabe can say that i haven't told them?? i feel like im in a court case it turns out i can apply through vcaa....but only after i sit the exams. Unless i repeat unit 4 next year?

[betruetoyou22]

i just basically told them my situation and asked where i can acess the application form. The guy i spoke to was like "yeah, look you can only apply through your school and only AFTER you sit your exams" and he's like that i'd find out if my application is approved a couple of weeks before i find out my atar score. so now its a matter of i have to sit my exams because i'm not even sure i'll get approved.

Wow, that is a terrible process IMO. They are basically forcing you to do the exams and study for them because they won't tell you if your approved beforehand. I can see where they are coming from that they would want to encourage everyone to still sit the exams, but in turn they are just putting unnecessary pressure on you in a time when you certainly don't need anything else to worry about.

tell me about it! now i'm forced to put my head back into the books and continue to my exams (even though i'm completely broken and depleted of strength) oh well -.- pain is cured through action no?

[Hodgeyhodgey]

Speaking from experience mate, it'll be best for you if you push on and continue with Year 12. It'd be hard to come this far and let it all go. There will definitely be some hard times ahead and times when you completely break but that's a given and putting off your graduation will not change that.

Be strong and you can do it.

[brenden]

If you want me to I'll call up VCAA tomorrow and push them. If ninwa says it's bullshit then that's bullshit enough to me. I have spares period 4 and 5 so I'll do a little bit of research myself and go in equipped.

i called them up AGAIN lol and they put me through to the same moron that i spoke to yesterday. he changed his mind today and told me that i could apply through vcaa but that i could only do it after i sat the exams. So i guess i'm going to continue studying and i'm going to sit the exams. "courage is going on, even when you don't have the strength to"

i don't think i have any other option. he's like my only other option is resitting unit 4 next year! such a prick he was.

The best definition of courage I ever heard. I'm glad you sorted that out - they won't reject your application, they'd have to be a bunch of stoned monkeys to make that mistake. He sounds like a real cockhead. I suppose it could be a good thing from one perspective - at least you have the freedom of not having to make a choice. Unless you wanted to resit in which case, power to you. I wish you all the best.

[ninwa]

Do you want someone to call up for you? enwiabe is great at scaring people into acquiescing to his demands... :p

Loll ninwa! you da bomb. is there anything enwiabe can say that i haven't told them?? i feel like im in a court case it turns out i can apply through vcaa....but only after i sit the exams. Unless i repeat unit 4 next year?

I was thinking along the lines of "I run a community of 40,000 students and I will go to the media with how badly you've treated this person" but on second thoughts threats probably aren't the best way of getting people on your side

Students should attend every examination session if at all possible and not miss an examination because they do not feel able to do their best.

The Special Provision procedures are designed to cover the case of a student who performs below expectations due to adverse circumstances.

If a student does not attend an examination session and their application for a Derived Examination Score is not approved they will not receive a score for that examination.

If you truly do not feel up to studying and attending your exams, then don't. You are not required to... you will only get a 0 if you don't receive a derived score but VCAA would have to be utter morons not to grant it.

If you decide to take that route I would suggest that you:
- see a doctor, tell them the situation and get them to write a medical note stating that in their professional opinion you are not fit to attend your exams. Or, ask for a referral to a psychiatrist who will write the note - but from experience a GP is generally happy to assess and attest to mental issues.
- I know this will be hard, but you need to ask for a medical history for your parent, which should have information as to their illness, the terminal diagnosis and the date of diagnosis. Or, a note from your parent's doctor - just make sure the note has the doctor's contact details on it and preferably an official hospital letterhead.

This is so you can have as much supporting documentation for your application as possible.

Unless i repeat unit 4 next year?

That's also an option -

Compassionate Late Withdrawal or Interrupted Studies

If an illness or personal circumstance has been so severe that a student has not been coping with the VCE demands, speak with the VCE Coordinator about Compassionate Late Withdrawal or Interrupted Studies status. The school will need supporting professional evidence if a student decides to pursue either of these options.

Maybe you should consider speaking to your VCE coordinator about this option? I have no idea what it means though...

[betruetoyou22]

Speaking from experience mate, it'll be best for you if you push on and continue with Year 12. It'd be hard to come this far and let it all go. There will definitely be some hard times ahead and times when you completely break but that's a given and putting off your graduation will not change that.

Be strong and you can do it.

You're 100 % right. i can do this!!!!!!!!!!

[s.ay]

You obviously have such amazing strength and courage, I have no doubt that whatever you choose to do, and whichever way you go about it, you will come out on top. Whilst I cannot begin to imagine how hard it must be at the moment, try to maintain a positive outlook. But remember: you are more than entitled to your feelings, and if you become overwhelmed over the next few weeks at any time, its perfectly okay and completely understandable. Everyone is here to help in whatever way possible, so never think that you are alone! Please take care

[betruetoyou22]

Do you want someone to call up for you? enwiabe is great at scaring people into acquiescing to his demands... :p

Loll ninwa! you da bomb. is there anything enwiabe can say that i haven't told them?? i feel like im in a court case it turns out i can apply through vcaa....but only after i sit the exams. Unless i repeat unit 4 next year?

I was thinking along the lines of "I run a community of 40,000 students and I will go to the media with how badly you've treated this person" but on second thoughts threats probably aren't the best way of getting people on your side

Students should attend every examination session if at all possible and not miss an examination because they do not feel able to do their best.

The Special Provision procedures are designed to cover the case of a student who performs below expectations due to adverse circumstances.

If a student does not attend an examination session and their application for a Derived Examination Score is not approved they will not receive a score for that examination.

If you truly do not feel up to studying and attending your exams, then don't. You are not required to... you will only get a 0 if you don't receive a derived score but VCAA would have to be utter morons not to grant it.

If you decide to take that route I would suggest that you:
- see a doctor, tell them the situation and get them to write a medical note stating that in their professional opinion you are not fit to attend your exams. Or, ask for a referral to a psychiatrist who will write the note - but from experience a GP is generally happy to assess and attest to mental issues.
- I know this will be hard, but you need to ask for a medical history for your parent, which should have information as to their illness, the terminal diagnosis and the date of diagnosis. Or, a note from your parent's doctor - just make sure the note has the doctor's contact details on it and preferably an official hospital letterhead.

This is so you can have as much supporting documentation for your application as possible.

Unless i repeat unit 4 next year?

That's also an option -

Compassionate Late Withdrawal or Interrupted Studies

If an illness or personal circumstance has been so severe that a student has not been coping with the VCE demands, speak with the VCE Coordinator about Compassionate Late Withdrawal or Interrupted Studies status. The school will need supporting professional evidence if a student decides to pursue either of these options.

Maybe you should consider speaking to your VCE coordinator about this option? I have no idea what it means though...

thank you so so so much for all your help!! i'm at a stage where i feel like i want to complete the exams regardless of how tired i feel. do you think its realistic of me to plan to attend most but not all of them so that the ones i do attend i'd be 100% devoted to them. like maths for example i've already done like 10 prac exams (20 if you count the fact that there's parts 1 & 2) and i want to do another 10 (aiming for s.s above 45) where as english i've only done 5 essays for text response and 2 for language analysis, so i feel like i wanna ditch it and perfect maths... its the only way i feel like i can catch up on what i've missed in the past three weeks but still leave enough room to spend time with dad. i want to give 100 % to certain subjects and then not attend or try as hard on others - do you think that would be a good plan??

[betruetoyou22]

You obviously have such amazing strength and courage, I have no doubt that whatever you choose to do, and whichever way you go about it, you will come out on top. Whilst I cannot begin to imagine how hard it must be at the moment, try to maintain a positive outlook. But remember: you are more than entitled to your feelings, and if you become overwhelmed over the next few weeks at any time, its perfectly okay and completely understandable. Everyone is here to help in whatever way possible, so never think that you are alone! Please take care

thank you so much. words like that give me soo much strength. <3