English Language essay submission and marking

[ECheong]

On the topic of Standard English, could someone look at mine? I've done lots of criticising; now it's your turn to return the favour
Yes, it's a bit too long. I'm still working on that bit. And yes I'm aware that I could have put in ethnolects, but I decided not to for this essay, otherwise it would have become even longer

I'll take my best shot at it . Though, admittedly, this is a pretty daunting task bearing in mind all the excellent feedback you've given on this thread LOL


The question to ask is: ‘Why not use Standard English all the time?”
   Standard English (SE), as a codified and standardised variant of English, is the language of education and most formal affairs. Its usefulness stems from its clarity and connotations of overt prestige. However, SE’s standardised nature forbids the expression of any form of identity, such as group identities within friends, national identities or even individual identities. Therefore, although SE has its uses and is important to society, its sphere of application is nevertheless limited.
   SE allows messages to be communicated clearly to a wide audience. As it is the language of education, SE is the dialect of English understood by the largest proportion of English speakers, regardless of their country, cultural background or regional dialect. Therefore, SE is very effective in texts with an informative function, such as newspapers, corporate brochures and non-fiction books. Also, due to its widely known status, SE is inclusive, as opposed to regional dialects and slangThis link might have worked better if it was broken into two, see below. This is exemplified in the Immigration Department’s new guide for employers to reduce the amount of Australian slang in the workplace. According to the guide, common Australian expressions like “this machine is cactus”, “just bring a plate” and even the diminutive “arvo” are easily misunderstood by those of ethnic origin, even though they are readily understood by Australians and create rapport amongst Australians that understand these expressions due to their connotations of Australian cultureThis is a fairly heavy sentence. In contrast, SE, as the language of English education, does not present these issues and is a much more viable and inclusive means of communication in the workplace. Similarly, SE was used by Julia Gillard in her Motion of Condolence speech given in 2011. Due to the national audience, SE was necessary to ensure that all English speakers, regardless of their ethnicity and cultural background, would understand the speech. This universal comprehension meant that messages like “we offer those loved ones our deepest sympathies” and “it’s with very great sorrow that I offer words of condolence to Australians” reached the audience exactly as intended, and indicates the importance of SE when communicating to wide audiences.Strongly presented argument, at times a little more of an explicit link between your idea and the example might have served to increase coherence within the paragraph. The link you did provide, "due to its widely known status..." just needed a small phrase linking that to its inclusiveness. Perhaps, separating out the contrasting "regional dialects and slang" will allow you to elaborate further on how it's more inclusive.
   Equally, SE creates overt prestige through the user’s demonstration of education in the English language. As SE represents educationbit of a tenuous link here (as it stands) does education necessarily mean formality and authority?, its usage marks formality and authority, which is another reason why SE is used in government documents, newspapers and court documents as well as in formal settings in general. Therefore, one criterion the BBC mentioned this year to spot a scam is the lack of SE, demonstrating SE’s connotations of professionalism. Another example is Julia Gillard’s misogyny speech, given last year against Tony Abbott. Usage of SE in this instance reflected the formal parliamentary setting and Gillard’s status at the time as Prime Minister. Syntactically, complex sentences like “I was very offended on the behalf of the women in Australia when…the Leader of the Opposition said…” and parallelism evident by the repetition of utterances beginning with “I was offended” reinforce authority and formality, while constant lexical reference to the “Leader of the Opposition” highlights the social status of the man she was attacking, which reflects her own social status. When Gillard attacked Tony Abbott, her SE insults, like referring to Abbott as “hypocritical” and as a person “light on accepting responsibility”, or as a person who “needs a mirror” to “see what misogyny in Australia looks like”expression a bit odd here, typo? Also, perhaps a point to note is that SE is the language of institution, if Julia Gillard had presented her speech with non-standard features everywhere then would it have held as much weight within the 'institution' of government?. Although the dysphemistic connotations of her speech are apparent, the usage of SE nevertheless upholds the formality of the occasion and maintains the speech’s appropriateness. SE’s connotations of formality thus explain Burridge’s comment that “Standard English is perceived to be intrinsically superior to other varieties”.
   However, non-Standard English varieties are much more useful in social situations than SE Might need a bit more specificity here, perhaps bring in social intimacy or identity here?. The other side of Burridge’s comment is that “examples are easy to find where nonstandard dialects appear to do things better”. As mentioned above, SE reinforces authority and social distance, which is undesirable in social contexts. Non-Standard English, therefore, is capable of reducing social distance and creating rapport between interlocutors, something unachievable by SE. Swearing is an example of this. As mentioned by author Kate Holden, using the f-word is “the quickest way to relax an audience”. It creates covert prestige amongst a group by subverting societal norms to not swear, and thus strengthens group identity. Therefore, the f-word has acquired various semantic properties. It can denote indifference (f that), act as an intensifier (f-ing awesome), act as a dysphemistic insult (f-ing stupid or f you) and can even denote coitus, which was its original tabooed meaning, and all of these demonstrate the growing acceptance of this word. This was shown by Kevin Rudd’s leaked online video in 2012 about the “f-ing language”, in reference to learning a difficult Chinese speech, and how it did not alienate him from the public; rather, people praised Rudd for being human and Australian. Similarly, slang can, according to Burridge, “serve the dual purpose of solidarity and secrecy”. As a group-specific informal variety of English, slang can cement group identity and exclude unwanted people. In Australian hospitals, for instance, hospital staff have been known to use the initialism “FLK” (funny looking kid), the adjective “cactus” (dead) and the dysphemistic “crumbles” (old and frail patients on the verge of death). Through such dehumanising language, the hospital staff members allow themselves to better deal with the reality of their job, identify caring for such patients as routine, identify shared interests and thus create group identity, while simultaneously creating a code incomprehensible to others, objectives not achievable through SE. Therefore, the effectiveness of non-Standard English in reducing social distance demonstrates the shortcomings of SE and why it should not be used all the time.
   Furthermore, non-Standard English varieties have greater linguistic freedom to create meaning. SE’s standardised nature means its vocabulary takes a much longer time to expand. In contrast, non-Standard neologisms may be coined at any time to express certain meanings more concisely than would have been possible in SE. This is the basis for many morphological word formation processes. Blends, like “chillax”, a blend of chill and relax meaning to calm down; and “vomatose”, a blend of vomit and comatose to denote something disgusting; and compounds, like “tree hugger” for extreme environmentalists; and “couch potato”, denoting a physically lazy person, combine semantic properties from the words used in their formation to concisely communicate specific meanings that SE lacks words for. These creative word formation processes also reflect the changes made to society and these are often sped up through the speed of online communication. Some neologisms reflect the advent of technology, like “memes”, referring to mimicked themes denoted by humorous pictures and words or the blend “geobragging”, constantly bragging about a person’s geographical location to gain attention. Others reflect important events in society, such as “twerking”, to denote Miley Cyrus’s performance habit of a protruding bottom and the compound “mummy porn”, which came to popularity following the publication of the novel “Fifty Shades of Grey”. Still other neologisms are formed mainly for humorous purposes, like the blend “bozone”, a blend of “bogus” and “ozone” referring to a substance surrounding stupid people that obstructs intelligence and “typochondriac”, a blend of “hypochondriac” and “type” to denote a fear of proofreading. Here, the humour derives from the blending of ozone, which is chemical jargon, and stupidity, which is ostensibly the polar opposite of the connotations of jargon, and from the phonological, semantic and morphological similarities between “hypochondriac” and “typochondriac”, and such humorous language play is not as feasible with SE. Therefore, non-Standard English has a much wider palette of linguistic resources at its disposal and is hence more versatile than SE.
   SE is the main tool of communication in society due to its clarity, formality and overt prestige. It is the language of choice for the government, media and business for these reasons. However, SE’s standardised nature and its formality may be obstacles in effective and enjoyable social communication. Therefore, SE is a useful tool of communication in general, but it is just one linguistic tool out of many.

Overall, VERY well substantiated essay, your examples very strongly supported your arguments and by extension your contention. I would note however, at times the examples lacked a slight link between your 'idea' and your examples. Metalanguage criteria wise, good demonstration of understanding. In terms of ideas and structure, fairly well balanced and tightly structured; each argument was pertinent to your contention and was argued in a logical order. At times though the number of examples might potentially have detracted from the argument of the paragraph (your final paragraph is what brought this point up for me) you did offer analysis but some of the examples there were longing for some even deeper exploration, there were some very interesting examples such as "typochondriac" and "geobragging" where a deeper analysis into why they were humorous as well as why they were non-standard would have strengthened the paragraph even more.

All in all, well argued and evidenced essay. Expression occasionally gets a bit heavy but to be completely honest that's just nitpicking  

Edit: added just a comment in the latter half of the essay cause I was very tired the first time I went through it

[echeongrocks]

Hi you guys! ^_^ i'm new here
it would be fantastic if i could grab feedback on this essay

Language and identity are inextricably linked. How is this reflected in the current Australian context? Refer to at least two subsystems of language in your response.

There is a distinct marriage between language and identity. Whether it be on an individual, national or even global scale, language has shown to be one significant means of fostering identity, particularly in contemporary Australia. The iconic Australian variety of English (AE) stands confident and strong in reflecting the identity of its speakers. Moreover, the 21st century has seen AE expand to accommodate Australia’s increasingly multicultural nature, while also evolve to successfully distinguish itself from other varieties of English. Finally, while language effectively articulates national identity, Australia’s increasingly prominent position in the global arena is further evidenced in AE.

The Australian national identity is reflected in the iconic variety of Australian English. Despite the expansion of AE, the fundamental values of Australians are still largely pronounced. Examples that demonstrate this idea include the conversion ‘bludger’ (from ‘to bludge’), idiomatic phrases such as ‘fair go’ and non-politically correct language including ‘witch’ (Sydney Morning Herald, 2013, with regard to former prime minister Julia Gillard). More specifically, these language features represent the fundamental Australian values of being carefree, egalitarian, and anti-authoritarian. Additionally, on a phonological level, it is evidenced that AE and our unique identity are inextricably linked. In fact, AE phonology has undergone significant adaptation because a confident language necessitates a confident new national image in the 21st century. Australians no longer perceive their voice as an ‘offense to the mother tongue’ (Churchill), but rather the General Australia accent - spoken by 90% of Australians - is now renowned due to its subtle uniqueness. A prime example of this is the GPS recording of Australian actress/singer Karen Jacobsen whose voiceover was voted most popular among British and American consumers in 2010. Moreover, they described her voice as ‘fresh’ and ‘mellifluous’, which indicates that the national variety is distinguishable, even at times preferred, among others. This is very different from Australia’s insecure past image. This relinquishment of the Broad Australian accent or ‘Strine’ indicates a newfound assertiveness of the national identity and that we no longer have the overt need to distinguish ourselves. In this way, both the attitudes and new national image of Australians are manifested in AE.

Australia’s diverse cultural identity is also reflected in the national language. In particular, the influx of migrants to contemporary Australian society has changed the dynamics of our language. This diversity is represented in lexical additions to our vernacular, including the backronym slang slur ‘wog’ and the acronym ‘FOB’ (‘Fresh Off Boat’). These lexemes reflect, not only a multicultural identity, but also various attitudes that reside within it. In current Australian contexts, this pejorative lexis has undergone a process of reclamation. That is, marginalized locutors have expanded the usage of the terms such that they are not used to discriminate but rather create solidarity. For example, this is relevant to the phrase ‘wog pride’ used by those of Mediterranean descent or the sentence ‘Me and my FOBS will be there’ by first-generation migrants, especially of Asian heritage. Here, language is creating a common identity between individuals. Furthermore, there has been a movement away from using Indigenous Australian words, such as ‘hard yakka’ and ‘bung’. However, there are still regional lexemes such as ‘Wagga Wagga’ and ‘Uluru’. All of these changes are representative of Australians having a multicultural and more “global identity”, rather than just that of the ‘land down under’.

Our language is also an articulation of how globalisation has impacted the country. Notably, aspects of American English infiltrated contemporary Australian English as we begin to succumb to America’s cultural hegemony. Due to America’s political and media influences, common Americanisms in Australian English include lexemes such as ‘hey’ and ‘dude’, as well as syntactic nuances, such as replacing the adverbial ‘well’ with the adjective ‘good’ in ‘you did good [well]’ and ‘I did good on that test’. These differences illustrate Australia’s movement towards the ‘sun that is America’ and as such, the shift away from parochialism. Additionally, technological advancements, in particular the Internet with social media, have accelerated the effects of globalisation and as a result language change is noticeable much more quickly. ‘Netspeak’ as a dialectal manifestation of this language change reflects the identity of individuals, most often young people. This online vernacular includes morphological conventions such as acronyms like ‘STFU’ (‘shut the f*** up’) and contractions such as ‘tomo’ (for tomorrow). This online vernacular is mutually understood among users globally which indicates that we are beginning to relate and identify globally with people of mutual generation
more significantly than on a national level.

Concepts of language and identity are constantly in a state of flux. The Australian variety of English showcases our unique national identity and fundamental values. However, interconnectivity between countries and the move towards a global identity is also evidenced in our language. Moreover, the advent of e-communication and the Internet provoke predictions of the future of language, but also importantly how it will inevitably continue to reflect and facilitate identity. To this end, language and identity are indubitably intertwined. 

T:1h

[ECheong]

jesus christ julie LMFAO

[HossRyams]

jesus christ julie LMFAO

Yeah, "Julie"

[lzxnl]

I'll take my best shot at it . Though, admittedly, this is a pretty daunting task bearing in mind all the excellent feedback you've given on this thread LOL


The question to ask is: ‘Why not use Standard English all the time?”
   Standard English (SE), as a codified and standardised variant of English, is the language of education and most formal affairs. Its usefulness stems from its clarity and connotations of overt prestige. However, SE’s standardised nature forbids the expression of any form of identity, such as group identities within friends, national identities or even individual identities. Therefore, although SE has its uses and is important to society, its sphere of application is nevertheless limited.
   SE allows messages to be communicated clearly to a wide audience. As it is the language of education, SE is the dialect of English understood by the largest proportion of English speakers, regardless of their country, cultural background or regional dialect. Therefore, SE is very effective in texts with an informative function, such as newspapers, corporate brochures and non-fiction books. Also, due to its widely known status, SE is inclusive, as opposed to regional dialects and slangThis link might have worked better if it was broken into two, see below. This is exemplified in the Immigration Department’s new guide for employers to reduce the amount of Australian slang in the workplace. According to the guide, common Australian expressions like “this machine is cactus”, “just bring a plate” and even the diminutive “arvo” are easily misunderstood by those of ethnic origin, even though they are readily understood by Australians and create rapport amongst Australians that understand these expressions due to their connotations of Australian cultureThis is a fairly heavy sentence. In contrast, SE, as the language of English education, does not present these issues and is a much more viable and inclusive means of communication in the workplace. Similarly, SE was used by Julia Gillard in her Motion of Condolence speech given in 2011. Due to the national audience, SE was necessary to ensure that all English speakers, regardless of their ethnicity and cultural background, would understand the speech. This universal comprehension meant that messages like “we offer those loved ones our deepest sympathies” and “it’s with very great sorrow that I offer words of condolence to Australians” reached the audience exactly as intended, and indicates the importance of SE when communicating to wide audiences.Strongly presented argument, at times a little more of an explicit link between your idea and the example might have served to increase coherence within the paragraph. The link you did provide, "due to its widely known status..." just needed a small phrase linking that to its inclusiveness. Perhaps, separating out the contrasting "regional dialects and slang" will allow you to elaborate further on how it's more inclusive.
   Equally, SE creates overt prestige through the user’s demonstration of education in the English language. As SE represents educationbit of a tenuous link here (as it stands) does education necessarily mean formality and authority?, its usage marks formality and authority, which is another reason why SE is used in government documents, newspapers and court documents as well as in formal settings in general. Therefore, one criterion the BBC mentioned this year to spot a scam is the lack of SE, demonstrating SE’s connotations of professionalism. Another example is Julia Gillard’s misogyny speech, given last year against Tony Abbott. Usage of SE in this instance reflected the formal parliamentary setting and Gillard’s status at the time as Prime Minister. Syntactically, complex sentences like “I was very offended on the behalf of the women in Australia when…the Leader of the Opposition said…” and parallelism evident by the repetition of utterances beginning with “I was offended” reinforce authority and formality, while constant lexical reference to the “Leader of the Opposition” highlights the social status of the man she was attacking, which reflects her own social status. When Gillard attacked Tony Abbott, her SE insults, like referring to Abbott as “hypocritical” and as a person “light on accepting responsibility”, or as a person who “needs a mirror” to “see what misogyny in Australia looks like”expression a bit odd here, typo? Also, perhaps a point to note is that SE is the language of institution, if Julia Gillard had presented her speech with non-standard features everywhere then would it have held as much weight within the 'institution' of government?. Although the dysphemistic connotations of her speech are apparent, the usage of SE nevertheless upholds the formality of the occasion and maintains the speech’s appropriateness. SE’s connotations of formality thus explain Burridge’s comment that “Standard English is perceived to be intrinsically superior to other varieties”.
   However, non-Standard English varieties are much more useful in social situations than SE Might need a bit more specificity here, perhaps bring in social intimacy or identity here?. The other side of Burridge’s comment is that “examples are easy to find where nonstandard dialects appear to do things better”. As mentioned above, SE reinforces authority and social distance, which is undesirable in social contexts. Non-Standard English, therefore, is capable of reducing social distance and creating rapport between interlocutors, something unachievable by SE. Swearing is an example of this. As mentioned by author Kate Holden, using the f-word is “the quickest way to relax an audience”. It creates covert prestige amongst a group by subverting societal norms to not swear, and thus strengthens group identity. Therefore, the f-word has acquired various semantic properties. It can denote indifference (f that), act as an intensifier (f-ing awesome), act as a dysphemistic insult (f-ing stupid or f you) and can even denote coitus, which was its original tabooed meaning, and all of these demonstrate the growing acceptance of this word. This was shown by Kevin Rudd’s leaked online video in 2012 about the “f-ing language”, in reference to learning a difficult Chinese speech, and how it did not alienate him from the public; rather, people praised Rudd for being human and Australian. Similarly, slang can, according to Burridge, “serve the dual purpose of solidarity and secrecy”. As a group-specific informal variety of English, slang can cement group identity and exclude unwanted people. In Australian hospitals, for instance, hospital staff have been known to use the initialism “FLK” (funny looking kid), the adjective “cactus” (dead) and the dysphemistic “crumbles” (old and frail patients on the verge of death). Through such dehumanising language, the hospital staff members allow themselves to better deal with the reality of their job, identify caring for such patients as routine, identify shared interests and thus create group identity, while simultaneously creating a code incomprehensible to others, objectives not achievable through SE. Therefore, the effectiveness of non-Standard English in reducing social distance demonstrates the shortcomings of SE and why it should not be used all the time.
   Furthermore, non-Standard English varieties have greater linguistic freedom to create meaning. SE’s standardised nature means its vocabulary takes a much longer time to expand. In contrast, non-Standard neologisms may be coined at any time to express certain meanings more concisely than would have been possible in SE. This is the basis for many morphological word formation processes. Blends, like “chillax”, a blend of chill and relax meaning to calm down; and “vomatose”, a blend of vomit and comatose to denote something disgusting; and compounds, like “tree hugger” for extreme environmentalists; and “couch potato”, denoting a physically lazy person, combine semantic properties from the words used in their formation to concisely communicate specific meanings that SE lacks words for. These creative word formation processes also reflect the changes made to society and these are often sped up through the speed of online communication. Some neologisms reflect the advent of technology, like “memes”, referring to mimicked themes denoted by humorous pictures and words or the blend “geobragging”, constantly bragging about a person’s geographical location to gain attention. Others reflect important events in society, such as “twerking”, to denote Miley Cyrus’s performance habit of a protruding bottom and the compound “mummy porn”, which came to popularity following the publication of the novel “Fifty Shades of Grey”. Still other neologisms are formed mainly for humorous purposes, like the blend “bozone”, a blend of “bogus” and “ozone” referring to a substance surrounding stupid people that obstructs intelligence and “typochondriac”, a blend of “hypochondriac” and “type” to denote a fear of proofreading. Here, the humour derives from the blending of ozone, which is chemical jargon, and stupidity, which is ostensibly the polar opposite of the connotations of jargon, and from the phonological, semantic and morphological similarities between “hypochondriac” and “typochondriac”, and such humorous language play is not as feasible with SE. Therefore, non-Standard English has a much wider palette of linguistic resources at its disposal and is hence more versatile than SE.
   SE is the main tool of communication in society due to its clarity, formality and overt prestige. It is the language of choice for the government, media and business for these reasons. However, SE’s standardised nature and its formality may be obstacles in effective and enjoyable social communication. Therefore, SE is a useful tool of communication in general, but it is just one linguistic tool out of many.

Overall, VERY well substantiated essay, your examples very strongly supported your arguments and by extension your contention. I would note however, at times the examples lacked a slight link between your 'idea' and your examples. Metalanguage criteria wise, good demonstration of understanding. In terms of ideas and structure, fairly well balanced and tightly structured; each argument was pertinent to your contention and was argued in a logical order. At times though the number of examples might potentially have detracted from the argument of the paragraph (your final paragraph is what brought this point up for me) you did offer analysis but some of the examples there were longing for some even deeper exploration, there were some very interesting examples such as "typochondriac" and "geobragging" where a deeper analysis into why they were humorous as well as why they were non-standard would have strengthened the paragraph even more.

All in all, well argued and evidenced essay. Expression occasionally gets a bit heavy but to be completely honest that's just nitpicking  

Edit: added just a comment in the latter half of the essay cause I was very tired the first time I went through it

Thanks, I'll take those on board (: for an actual exam, I'll cut out lots of the examples out anyway as I can't afford such a long essay.
Point about specificity taken; I have a tendency to do that.

Hi you guys! ^_^ i'm new here
it would be fantastic if i could grab feedback on this essay

Language and identity are inextricably linked. How is this reflected in the current Australian context? Refer to at least two subsystems of language in your response.

There is a distinct marriage between language and identity. Whether it be on an individual, national or even global scale, language has shown to be one significant means of fostering identity, particularly in contemporary Australia. The iconic Australian variety of English (AE) stands confident and strong in reflecting the identity of its speakers. Moreover, the 21st century only 21st? has seen AE expand to accommodate Australia’s increasingly multicultural nature, while also evolve to successfully distinguish itself from other varieties of English. Finally, while language effectively articulates national identity, Australia’s increasingly prominent position in the global arena is further evidenced in AE. I don't think contentions are best begun with "finally"; makes it sound like part of a list as opposed to an important point in itself. Otherwise, good intro

The Australian national identity is reflected in the iconic variety of Australian English. Despite the expansion of AE, the fundamental values of Australians are still largely pronounced. Examples that demonstrate this idea include the conversion ‘bludger’ (from ‘to bludge’), idiomatic phrases such as ‘fair go’ and non-politically correct language including ‘witch’ (Sydney Morning Herald, 2013, with regard to former prime minister Julia Gillard). More specifically, these language features represent the fundamental Australian values of being carefree, egalitarian, and anti-authoritarian. be specific with each one; don't gloss over all of them like this at once Additionally, on a phonological level, it is evidenced that AE and our unique identity are inextricably linked. In fact, AE phonology has undergone significant adaptation because a confident language necessitates a confident new national image in the 21st century. Australians no longer perceive their voice as an ‘offense to the mother tongue’ (Churchill), but rather the General Australia accent - spoken by 90% of Australians - is now renowned due to its subtle uniqueness. A prime example of this is the GPS recording of Australian actress/singer Karen Jacobsen whose voiceover was voted most popular among British and American consumers in 2010. Moreover, they described her voice as ‘fresh’ and ‘mellifluous’, which indicates that the national variety is distinguishable, even at times preferred, among others. This is very different from Australia’s insecure past image what past image? Mention? . This relinquishment of the Broad Australian accent or ‘Strine’ indicates a newfound assertiveness of the national identity and that we no longer have the overt need to distinguish ourselves. This point needs developing; I'm not quite sure what you're trying to say here. In this way, both the attitudes and new national image of Australians are manifested in AE. Overall sound paragraph, but the last point slightly weakened it

Australia’s diverse cultural identity is also reflected in the national language are these examples part of the national language? wog and fob don't seem like it.... In particular, the influx of migrants to contemporary Australian society has changed the dynamics of our language. This diversity is represented in lexical additions to our vernacular, including the backronym slang slur ‘wog’ and the acronym ‘FOB’ (‘Fresh Off Boat’). These lexemes reflect, not only a multicultural identity, but also various attitudes that reside within it. In current Australian contexts, this pejorative lexis has undergone a process of reclamation. That is, marginalized locutors have expanded the usage of the terms such that they are not used to discriminate but rather create solidarity. For example, this is relevant to the phrase ‘wog pride’ used by those of Mediterranean descent or the sentence ‘Me and my FOBS will be there’ by first-generation migrants, especially of Asian heritage. Here, language is creating a common identity between individuals. Furthermore, there has been a movement away from using Indigenous Australian words, such as ‘hard yakka’ and ‘bung’. what's the point of this? However, there are still regional lexemes such as ‘Wagga Wagga’ and ‘Uluru’. All of these changes are representative of Australians having a multicultural and more “global identity”, rather than just that of the ‘land down under’. I don't quite like your last point; place names are quite hard to change and these were established earlier

Our language is also an articulation of how globalisation has impacted the country. Notably, aspects of American English infiltrated contemporary Australian English as we begin to succumb to America’s cultural hegemony be careful so that you don't contradict your first paragraph. Due to America’s political and media influences, common Americanisms in Australian English include lexemes such as ‘hey’ and ‘dude’, as well as syntactic nuances, such as replacing the adverbial ‘well’ with the adjective ‘good’ in ‘you did good [well]’ and ‘I did good on that test’ is this the best example there is? Media example?. These differences illustrate Australia’s movement towards the ‘sun that is America’ and as such, the shift away from parochialism. Additionally, technological advancements, in particular the Internet with social media, have accelerated the effects of globalisation and as a result language change is noticeable much more quickly. ‘Netspeak’ as a dialectal manifestation of this language change reflects the identity of individuals, most often young people. This online vernacular includes morphological conventions such as acronyms like ‘STFU’ (‘shut the f*** up’) and contractions such as ‘tomo’ (for tomorrow). This online vernacular is mutually understood among users globally which indicates that we are beginning to relate and identify globally with people of mutual generation if you mention online language, best not to just briefly mention it like this as online language is TOO diverse. Plus, I'd hardly say that older generations can't work out what STFU and tomo mean
more significantly than on a national level.

Concepts of language and identity are constantly in a state of flux. The Australian variety of English showcases our unique national identity and fundamental values. However, interconnectivity between countries and the move towards a global identity sort of an oxymoron; a "global identity" as in one shared by the world? Huh!? is also evidenced in our language. Moreover, the advent of e-communication and the Internet provoke predictions of the future of language you didn't mention this in your main body, but also importantly how it will inevitably continue to reflect and facilitate identity. To this end, language and identity are indubitably intertwined. 

T:1h

Overall, your examples are sound and your commentary is generally ok, with good use of metalanguage. However, you tend to tack on undeveloped arguments to the ends of your paragraphs which doesn't help them; it weakens your paragraphs. Either develop them, or omit them.
Sometimes, your points aren't too clear as well, but those are small issues. Occasionally you could do with better and more revealing examples xP

[echeongrocks]

Thanks pal! Great advice, i'll definitely take on board

[Piglet101]

Any feedback is appreciated
Thanks in advance!

Insight 2013 - Question 10
Discuss the role of covert linguistic practices in establishing group solidarity. Refer to two or more subsystem in your response.

Covert linguistic practices serve the purpose of establishing group solidarity and meeting positive face needs. In contemporary Australia, the use of covertly prestigious language shifts according to the context and intentions of the speaker. For instance, during family or ethnic meetings, individuals are more inclined to demonstrate covert language as it meets the culture and tradition of those around them. Likewise, Australian English is covertly prestigious among Australians as it embraces Australian culture and conveys national pride. This is reinforced by the negative attitudes towards the increase in Americanisation of Australian Lingo.  Furthermore, Australian adolescents rely on non-standard Australian English (AE) to obtain covert prestige among their peers and to construct their identity as the “youth of Australia”. This is demonstrated through lexicology, morphology and phonology.

Australians have the tendency to change their language under ethnic and family situations, in order to accommodate to the context and values of others. For example , Lebanese speakers commonly employ vocatives such as “brother” and “sister” to show respect, meet positive face needs and ultimately to reduce the social distance between interlocutors. Code switching is another device employed by Australians in order to enhance effective communication and to signify membership in an ethnic community. The knowledge of sharing a common language and culture not only strengthens the relationship between participants but also reinforces one’s cultural identity. On the other hand, during family contexts, members may use inferences and several lexemes such as “Toby” in reference to the family cat to again aid in effective communication, but also to increase group solidarity between family members. Since such inferences can only be understood by those with the family, the language employed has an inclusionary effect. Therefore, the shift in language to better suit family and cultural events, all so helps to strengthen the relationship and meet positive face needs of the participants.

Australian lingo not only reinforces our Australian identity but also brings the people of Australia closer as nation. The creeping influence of American culture in Australia’s vernacular has been a building issue in today’s society. For example, the cherished Australian vocative “mate” has been observed to be dominated by the American vocative “buddy”. The American influence in this case has be frowned upon by the general public as it is believed to have changed Australia’s image of being relaxed and down to earth. Conversely, when the Australian expressions “no worries” and “fair enough” are employed, it not only conveys Australia’s egalitarian and friendly nature but all so reinforces the membership to the Australian community.  Likewise, the difference between the standard, “I’m having a barbeque at my house this afternoon” compared to the Australian slang version “I’m havin’ a barbie at my house this arvo” is a perfect portrayal of Australia’s warm and welcoming nature. It sounds more inviting and intimate; thereby it closes social distance and creates covert prestige. In addition, the popularised Australianised lexeme “brah” is a construction of the American slang term “bro” where the diphthong /oʊ/ is reduced to the weaker monophthong /a/. This phonological reduction again reflects the informal, casual nature of Australians which is favoured among the public as it is supports national pride and identity. Thus the covert Australian lingo is practiced in today’s society as it establishes group solidarity and reinforces one’s Australian identity.

The identity of Australian teenagers is affiliated with non-standard Australian English, which helps to establish group solidarity between members of the same generation.  Adolescents are renowned for their rebellious and wild personalities. This is reflected through the inclusive and exclusive nature of the language, as supported by Philippa Law’s claim that “Teenagers have a particular desire to keep in with their peers and keep secrets from others that’s why teenage slang changes so quickly and why parents and mainstream media are always one step behind.” This exclusionary effect is further supported by abbreviations such as “POS”, which stands for “Parents Over the Shoulder”. This is employed commonly by teens to create a warning or to secretly signify to others the current situation. Teens all so create non-standard neologisms such as the blended items “Mascary” (someone who wears a scary amount of mascara) and “intexicated” (a state of distraction cause by texting), which reinforces social identity and maintain the spontaneous and ‘fresh’ impression that teenspeak carries.  Covert linguistic practices evident in teenspeak help to identify members who do not belong, and primarily establish in group solidarity between those who do.

During certain contexts, such as with family or cultural communities, language changes from overt AE to a more covertly prestigious form in order to establish group solidarity and reinforce the relationship between interlocutors. Furthermore, the use of Australian lingo in contemporary Australia meets the positive face needs of the public and reflects one’s Australian identity. This helps to close social distance and thereby meet positive needs.  This is all so demonstrated in teenspeak where covert linguistic practices are heavily relied on to maintain the identity as Australian adolescents. It serves the purpose to both include and exclude others in one’s social group and ultimately non-standard AE is employed among teens to develop and build group solidarity.

[lzxnl]

Any feedback is appreciated
Thanks in advance!

Insight 2013 - Question 10
Discuss the role of covert linguistic practices in establishing group solidarity. Refer to two or more subsystem in your response.

Covert linguistic practices serve the purpose of establishing group solidarity and meeting positive face needs. In contemporary Australia, the use of covertly prestigious language shifts according to the context and intentions of the speaker. For instance, during family or ethnic meetings, individuals are more inclined to demonstrate covert language I don't feel comfortable with this phrasing as it meets the culture and tradition of those around them. Likewise, Australian English is covertly prestigious among Australians as it embraces Australian culture and conveys national pride. This is reinforced by the negative attitudes towards the increase in Americanisation of Australian Lingo.  Furthermore, Australian adolescents rely on non-standard Australian English (AE) to obtain covert prestige among their peers and to construct their identity as the “youth of Australia”. This is demonstrated through lexicology, morphology and phonology. contention?

Australians have the tendency to change their language under ethnic and family situations, in order to accommodate to the context and values of others weak topic sentence; not too linked to topic. For example , Lebanese speakers commonly employ vocatives such as “brother” and “sister” to show respect, meet positive face needs and ultimately to reduce the social distance between interlocutors. one example skimmed over like this isn't particularly strong Code switching is another device employed by Australians in order to enhance effective communication and to signify membership in an ethnic community. The knowledge of sharing a common language and culture not only strengthens the relationship between participants but also reinforces one’s cultural identity need examples here. On the other hand, during family contexts, members may use inferences and several lexemes such as “Toby” in reference to the family cat to again aid in effective communication, but also to increase group solidarity between family members most pertinent example you can come up with?. Since such inferences can only be understood by those with the family, the language employed has an inclusionary inclusive? effect. Therefore, the shift in language to better suit family and cultural events, all so helps to strengthen the relationship and meet positive face needs of the participants. I'm not too sure about the examples of this essay

Australian lingo not only reinforces our Australian identity but also brings the people of Australia closer as nation. The creeping influence of American culture in Australia’s vernacular has been a building issue in today’s society a bit of a large jump from your topic sentence. For example, the cherished Australian vocative “mate” has been observed to be dominated by the American vocative “buddy”. The American influence in this case has be frowned upon by the general public as it is believed to have changed Australia’s image of being relaxed and down to earth diluting the identity?. Conversely, when the Australian expressions “no worries” and “fair enough” are employed, it not only conveys Australia’s egalitarian and friendly nature but all so reinforces the membership to the Australian community.  Likewise, the difference between the standard, “I’m having a barbeque at my house this afternoon” compared to the Australian slang version “I’m havin’ a barbie at my house this arvo” metalanguage! is a perfect portrayal of Australia’s warm and welcoming nature. It sounds more inviting and intimate; thereby it closes social distance and creates covert prestige. In addition, the popularised Australianised lexeme “brah” is a construction of the American slang term “bro” where the diphthong /oʊ/ is reduced to the weaker monophthong /a/. This phonological reduction again reflects the informal, casual nature of Australians which is favoured among the public as it is supports national pride and identity. Thus the covert Australian lingo is practiced in today’s society as it establishes group solidarity and reinforces one’s Australian identity. I think it would have been stronger to focus on one subsystem here

The identity of Australian teenagers is affiliated with non-standard Australian English, which helps to establish group solidarity between members of the same generation.  Adolescents are renowned for their rebellious and wild personalities. This is reflected through the inclusive and exclusive nature of the language, as supported by Philippa Law’s claim that “Teenagers have a particular desire to keep in with their peers and keep secrets from others that’s why teenage slang changes so quickly and why parents and mainstream media are always one step behind.” This exclusionary effect is further supported by abbreviations such as “POS”, which stands for “Parents Over the Shoulder”. This is employed commonly by teens to create a warning or to secretly signify to others the current situation to exclude?. Teens all so create non-standard neologisms such as the blended items “Mascary” (someone who wears a scary amount of mascara) and “intexicated” (a state of distraction cause by texting), which reinforces social identity and maintain the spontaneous and ‘fresh’ please keep this formal impression that teenspeak carries.  Covert linguistic practices evident in teenspeak help to identify members who do not belong, and primarily establish in group solidarity between those who do. topic sentence sounds funny now. Topic sentence too broad; you only seem to cover a small portion of non-Standard English

During certain contexts, such as with family or cultural communities, language changes from overt AE to a more covertly prestigious form in order to establish group solidarity and reinforce the relationship between interlocutors. Furthermore, the use of Australian lingo in contemporary Australia meets the positive face needs of the public and reflects one’s Australian identity. This helps to close social distance and thereby meet positive needs does using Australian language meet positive face needs at all? I don't see how; if it does, at least explain it.  This is all so spelling? demonstrated in teenspeak where covert linguistic practices are heavily relied on to maintain the identity as Australian adolescents. It serves the purpose to both include and exclude others in one’s social group and ultimately non-standard AE is employed among teens to develop and build group solidarity. concluding sentence?

You have some ok ideas here, but I feel you jump around a bit too much. You need depth over breadth; that will get you more marks. Also, some of your examples really aren't the best, nor do they prove your point well. Try and pick some examples from the media.
Also, your essay appears to lack important components, like concluding sentences to the introduction and the conclusion. Be mindful.

Otherwise, a fair effort!

[Piglet101]

Thank you so much for your feedback!
I'll try focus on all those areas for my next essay. Hopefully I improve before the exam! 

[jenny_kim]

Hi all,
I'm new here, was just wondering if one of you could give me feedback on my essay?

Be as critical as you want!!!! i need it.
cheers.

Discuss some of the driving forces that lead to language change in the Australian context. Refer to at least two subsystems in your response. (VCAA 2010)

Australian English, like any other variety, has undergone change in the past, and continues to change today. This change is driven by several factors. Evidenced through the past reform of Australian English, as well as the demographic growth and expansion of the nation’s population, the changing nature of language mirrors the internal factors that change within society. Moreover, other external factors continue to develop Australian society, thus coercing the language to reflect its multifaceted and fluxing nature.

The development of an Australian identity, independent of Britain, has altered Australian language, especially in the 20th century. The desire for Australia to create an identity separate from its ‘mother nation,’ Britain, can be exemplified through the changing attitudes towards Received Pronunciation which was once overt prestige, and any stray away from standard English was “not Australian English, it was bad English” (Donald Horne). Newsreaders, as well as elitists throughout the earlier stages of the 20th century within Australia used RP, which manifested itself into the cultivated accent, until approximately the Second World War. Diphthongisation of vowels, characteristic of RP, was perceived to be associated with British Imperialism along with its notions of linguistic correctness and social hierarchy (which was recognised within the UK.) Robert J Menzies (1939), former Prime Minister of Australia’s declaration of World War One was addressed through the cultivated Australian accent. Menzies opened with “Fellow Australians …Great Britain has declared war against her (Germany), and that as a result, Australia is also at war.” Phonetically, Robert Menzies displays a linkage between UK English and Australian English through his cultivated accent but also semantically addresses the national status of Australia – governmentally married to UK and yet to become independently self-governing. Consequently, the linkage can be seen through language. The Broad Australian accent, which was also prevalent at the time, was ridiculed by its nasal twang and deduced by prescriptivists as non-standard. Though, the growing national attitude to become independent of Britain empowered the desire for Australia to also establish an independent language. As a result, RP, diminished rapidly within the later stages of the 20th century, leaving the general accent to prevail. This can be seen through the existing accents of newsreaders such as Jennie Brockie (SBS Insight TV show host) and actress Nicole Kidman who speak with the general accent. Thus, the reform of government demonstrates a past driving force of language change within the Australian context, as seen through the phonetic digression away from RP and the cultivated accent.

Demographic changes in Australian society have changed Australian English, in particular by broadening the lexical scope. The influx of immigrants after the First World War also invited waves of lexical items. These have now become well established within the nation’s rich lexical repertoire, and are recognised by most Australians. The Italian dish, ‘Parmagianna’ has been hypocoristically altered, as seen by slogans such as “Try the best Parmie in Melbourne” (Palmerston Hotel, South Melbourne, 2013) or to the alternative “Parma” to showcase the wide acceptance of foreign nouns which have now been adopted into the vocabulary of many Australians. This can also be seen through the colloquial noun, “spag-bol” shortened from the Italian dish “spaghetti Bolognese,” or the more recently acquired “k-bbq,” acronym standing for “Korean Barbecue.” In spite of this, the cultural exposure that continues to proliferate the Australian lexicon has also fostered negative language change, giving rise to racist slang. Recent encounter of a French tourist racially tyrannised by Sydney locals on a public bus spotlighted new racial slang as exemplified through the acronym “S.O.D” (speak English or die motherfucker). Similarly, such racist slang can also be seen through dismissive labels such as “curry-muncher,” “chink,” ”gook,” “abo,” “wog,” “whites” and “poms,” just to name a few. Indeed, as Australian culture has and continues to be diversified, the language changes relatively, broadening the lexical scope in negative and positive ways. 

External cultural influences have also left their mark on Australian English, notably in the form of Americanisms and ethnolects. With the assistance of technology, the Internet in particular, AE has managed to adopt colloquialism as well as spellings from varieties such as American English. For instance, the Standard American English spelled suffix “-ize” is becoming widely adopted by Australians despite the standard Australian spelling “-ise.” The influence of Americanisms can also be seen through the phonetic pronunciation and spelling of “ass,” contrasting to the Australian pronunciation and spelling  “arse.” It seems that older generations of Australian prefer the pronunciation and spelling ‘arse’ whereas younger generations employ the spelling and pronunciation “ass,” and there are also those who spell the lexeme as ‘ass’ but however pronounce it as ‘arse.’  This disparity between generational pronunciation and spelling displays the different influences that have shaped the language of the generation. The Internet, and technology in general have managed to engage interlocutors who speak varieties that stem from the polycentric core of English, as seen through the influences of Americanisms on AE. Moreover, multicultural status of Australia has created a ‘melting pot’ of ethnicities as well as languages. “Konglish,” a colloquial term coined for Korean-Australian English spoken by first generation immigrants, exemplifies the growth of AE. Konglish was formed much in the same way a pidgin is constructed through the mergence of two creoles – in order to create a linguistic platform for interlocutors to convey information as well as build solidarity. Nouns such as “television” are colloquially palatalised to “tell-li-bi” and “remote control” is substituted by “ri-mo-kon” to mimic the staccato rhythm that is characteristic of Korean. An ethnolect, like jargon, allows for interlocutors to speak more concisely and effectively, as well as building language communities. And Konglish is just one ethnolect that has arisen subsequent to the driving force of multiculturalism within the Australian context, and spotlights AE’s ongoing ability to foster new varieties.

The language used in Australia has changed, and continues to change, due to both external factors, such as cultural influences and internal factors, such as changes in society. Indeed, “time changes all things; there is no reason why language should escape this universal law” (Ferdinand de Saussure). Australian English too, like any other language, changes relative to the “context, conventions and circumstances” (Stephen Fry) that govern it, and although the surface details differ from multiculturalism to governmental reform, it is these underlying forces that lead to language change.

[teletubbies_95]

I know there is a million grammatical errors due to my crappy typing skills. SORRY. Criticise freely!

http://www.vcaa.vic.edu.au/Documents/exams/englishlanguage/2005englang.pdf

“Wasted” Analytical Commentary :
This text is an extract from a novel called “Wasted “ in the point of view of protagonist, teenage boy named “Ryan” . The primary function of the text is to express the protagonists feelings about his situation , as well as simultaneously having a phatic function with his mother. The overarching function is to engage the Australian audience through telling them a  story about a teenage boys experience about not being allowed to go meet his friends because of his parents refusal . The register of the text is largely informal and a tense tone is created at many points during the text. Te relationship between the characters of the story can also be seen through the register. Furthermore, the prose is highly planned and conforms to both the written and spoken mode to fulfil the functions of the text.

The lexical and semantic features of the text support the function , audience and register of the text . The author’s use of persona pronoun , such as “I”(1) , “me”(25)  and “my “(49) are employed to signal that the text is in first person , ad the in the point of view of a teenager who is expressing his feelings about not being able to meet his friends because of his mothers’ refusal, thus supporting the expressive function. The Australian audience identity of the speaker is conveyed through lexical features employed. For instance , slang terms such as “ catching up” (26) , “You suck “ (48), “stuff it” (56)  and “I reckon”( 49) , are all typical of the Australian discourse . These lexemes are used to emphasise to the audience about the contextual settings of the text ,as well as to emphasise that the text is aimed at an Australian audience. Present participle verbs , such as “mutter” (48) , “asks”(1) and “trying”(18) are used to create a tense tone in the text , as the reader feels that they are encountering what the protagonist is experiencing at present, further engaging the audience to read the prose. The semantic features of the text assist the author in engaging the reader to read the text and effectively express the protagonists feelings. Figurative language , such as the use of metaphor , “bullterrier “ (14) to describe the author’s mother , as well as noun phrases to extend the metaphor, such as “stands her ground and growls at you “ , with “growl “ being a typical action of dog. This is employed to create imagery , so an image is painted in the readers’ mind about his mother’s strong willed personality. Similarly , figurative language from the semantic field of crime such as “ homicide detective not half as aggressive “ (28) and “She’ll be taking swab tests” (32) are employed to describe the speakers’ feelings about how clever his mother is . Another metaphor “fossils “ (54) is employed by the speaker to show the protagonists negative feelings about “fossils” , which is associated with being “ancient “ , further conveying his troubled relationship with his parents.

The morphological and syntactic features of the text to enable the author to signify many aspects of the text. The author employs contractions , such as “I’ve “ (6) and “I’m “(20) to signal the informal nature of the text , and more importantly the presence of dialogue . This supports the spoken mode of the text and thus the phatic function. Furthermore, the speakers Australian identity , is created with the use of diminutives , such as “oldies “ , in which the typical inflectional morpheme , “-ies” , is employed. This signals the intended audience as being Australian, as it is typically used with Australian –English speaking interlocutors. Declarative sentences are also employed , such as “I can’t wait to get out of this house” (51) predominantly aiding the protagonists expressive function. Compound sentences are predominantly to outline the protagonists feelings , and thus aiding the expressive function. Furthermore, interrogatives are employed by the mother , author character of the text to question her son’s motives , thus aiding the phatic function. Compound sentences are employed to outline the protagonists train of thought , such as “ I’m wearing my jeans and my hooded jacket and you ...” , aiding the expression function. The spontaneity of the text is largely reflected through the use of ellipsis , such as “My mother .” (28) and” Live my only life “(51) . This is because he is expressing his feelings in the present , in his own point of view. Furthermore, through the use of ellipsis , his strained relationship with his mother is reflected. For instance, in line  12 “out” , an answer given by the  protagonist when the mother asks about where he is going. The one word lexeme reply demonstrates that he is not comfortable enough to disclose any information about his motives with his mother. The combination of different syntactic structures helps set the rhythm ,which complements the dialogue and mirrors the narratives emotions , as the author  tells the story.

Since the text is an extract of a novel , it conforms to the conventions of the text type. The dialogue is indented , to signal the belonging of the dialogue , and separate  paragraphs are created to demonstrate the ideas expressed by the protagonist . These features further emphasise the planned nature of the text. It is likely that the text was written with an Australian audience in mind. This is shown through the use of inference to create textual coherence ., as well as drawing on shared understandings of aspects of the “Aussie “ identity. For instance , “ mark”(39) , the reader must know that the lexeme refers to a tactic used in Australian Rules Football , as well as in line 37 “ pay out on them, the reader has to know it is a typical saying in Australian horse –racing.

The author has achieved a high level of cohesion to enable logical, yet  engaging story to occur. Front focus used throughout the dialogue , such as “I’ve finished all my homework “ I tell her “( 6) and “ I forgot what the question was “ I say””( 10 ) . This is typical of a dialogue of narratives  , to help highlight the dialogue , by postponing the verb and so avoiding prominence. Anaphoric references is employed , such as personal pronoun “her “  (6) and “she “(5) to refer to his mother lexemes , to create to links between the noun-referent and the personal pronoun , as well as avoiding repetition to enhance the engaging function of the text.

[charmanderp]

How useful has everyone found this thread? Has it been a good way of getting feedback, yourself? Has anyone been able to take the feedback provided to others and then apply that to your their own writing? Have you provided anyone else with feedback? Do you feel you were able to get it across clearly and effectively? Is it confusing/inconvenient at all? Let me know if you have any suggestions as to how we can improve this system! (: I might add a poll later.

[|ll|lll|]

I know there is a million grammatical errors due to my crappy typing skills. SORRY. Criticise freely!

http://www.vcaa.vic.edu.au/Documents/exams/englishlanguage/2005englang.pdf

“Wasted” Analytical Commentary :
This text is an extract from a novel called “Wasted “ in the point of view of protagonist, teenage boy named “Ryan” . The primary function of the text is to express the protagonists feelings about his situation , as well as simultaneously having a phatic function with his mother. The overarching function is to engage the Australian audience through telling them a  story about a teenage boys experience about not being allowed to go meet his friends because of his parents refusal . The register of the text is largely informal and a tense tone is created at many points during the text. Te relationship between the characters of the story can also be seen through the register. Furthermore, the prose is highly planned and conforms to both the written and spoken mode to fulfil the functions of the text.

The lexical and semantic features of the text support the function , audience and register of the text . The author’s use of persona pronoun , such as “I”(1) , “me”(25)  and “my “(49) are employed to signal that the text is in first person , ad the in the point of view of a teenager who is expressing his feelings about not being able to meet his friends because of his mothers’ refusal, thus supporting the expressive function. The Australian audience identity of the speaker is conveyed through lexical features employed. For instance , slang terms such as “ catching up” (26) , “You suck “ (48), “stuff it” (56)  and “I reckon”( 49) , are all typical of the Australian discourse . These lexemes are used to emphasise to the audience about the contextual settings of the text ,as well as to emphasise that the text is aimed at an Australian audience. Present participle verbs , such as “mutter” (48) , “asks”(1) and “trying”(18) are used to create a tense tone in the text , as the reader feels that they are encountering what the protagonist is experiencing at present, further engaging the audience to read the prose. The semantic features of the text assist the author in engaging the reader to read the text and effectively express the protagonists feelings. Figurative language , such as the use of metaphor , “bullterrier “ (14) to describe the author’s mother , as well as noun phrases to extend the metaphor, such as “stands her ground and growls at you “ , with “growl “ being a typical action of dog. This is employed to create imagery , so an image is painted in the readers’ mind about his mother’s strong willed personality. Similarly , figurative language from the semantic field of crime such as “ homicide detective not half as aggressive “ (28) and “She’ll be taking swab tests” (32) are employed to describe the speakers’ feelings about how clever his mother is . Another metaphor “fossils “ (54) is employed by the speaker to show the protagonists negative feelings about “fossils” , which is associated with being “ancient “ , further conveying his troubled relationship with his parents.

The morphological and syntactic features of the text to enable the author to signify many aspects of the text. The author employs contractions , such as “I’ve “ (6) and “I’m “(20) to signal the informal nature of the text , and more importantly the presence of dialogue . This supports the spoken mode of the text and thus the phatic function. Furthermore, the speakers Australian identity , is created with the use of diminutives , such as “oldies “ , in which the typical inflectional morpheme , “-ies” , is employed. This signals the intended audience as being Australian, as it is typically used with Australian –English speaking interlocutors. Declarative sentences are also employed , such as “I can’t wait to get out of this house” (51) predominantly aiding the protagonists expressive function. Compound sentences are predominantly to outline the protagonists feelings , and thus aiding the expressive function. Furthermore, interrogatives are employed by the mother , author character of the text to question her son’s motives , thus aiding the phatic function. Compound sentences are employed to outline the protagonists train of thought , such as “ I’m wearing my jeans and my hooded jacket and you ...” , aiding the expression function. The spontaneity of the text is largely reflected through the use of ellipsis , such as “My mother .” (28) and” Live my only life “(51) . This is because he is expressing his feelings in the present , in his own point of view. Furthermore, through the use of ellipsis , his strained relationship with his mother is reflected. For instance, in line  12 “out” , an answer given by the  protagonist when the mother asks about where he is going. The one word lexeme reply demonstrates that he is not comfortable enough to disclose any information about his motives with his mother. The combination of different syntactic structures helps set the rhythm ,which complements the dialogue and mirrors the narratives emotions , as the author  tells the story.

Since the text is an extract of a novel , it conforms to the conventions of the text type. The dialogue is indented , to signal the belonging of the dialogue , and separate  paragraphs are created to demonstrate the ideas expressed by the protagonist . These features further emphasise the planned nature of the text. It is likely that the text was written with an Australian audience in mind. This is shown through the use of inference to create textual coherence ., as well as drawing on shared understandings of aspects of the “Aussie “ identity. For instance , “ mark”(39) , the reader must know that the lexeme refers to a tactic used in Australian Rules Football , as well as in line 37 “ pay out on them, the reader has to know it is a typical saying in Australian horse –racing.

The author has achieved a high level of cohesion to enable logical, yet  engaging story to occur. Front focus used throughout the dialogue , such as “I’ve finished all my homework “ I tell her “( 6) and “ I forgot what the question was “ I say””( 10 ) . This is typical of a dialogue of narratives  , to help highlight the dialogue , by postponing the verb and so avoiding prominence. Anaphoric references is employed , such as personal pronoun “her “  (6) and “she “(5) to refer to his mother lexemes , to create to links between the noun-referent and the personal pronoun , as well as avoiding repetition to enhance the engaging function of the text.

1. I don't think the text as a phatic function; it is more referential/informative. Note that the audience are readers of the novel, not the mother. It is clear that the author is not trying to socialise with the readers, but convey his perspective of the Australian language and reinforce his Australian identity. Not sure if you had to analyse Deadly Unna during the course of this year -  the concepts regarding audience behind are similar.

2. One feature of the Aus language is swearing - it is very mild here with 'You suck'. You may consider this too.

3. There are good points mentioned, but you should also consider conversational strategies. For example, that sentence constituting only one lexeme is a feature of minimal response. The fact that this is a written dialogue (i.e. spoken mode being transcripted) is also worth commenting and analysing.

4. In terms of contextual factors (one of the criteria in the SD) and social relationship, you should elaborate the use of interrogative and declarative statements used by the mother. She does this because Ryan has provoked her and she's exercising her power over him etc.

5. You wouldn't have to know this but I think Tiffany Dellarossi is an Australian icon.

[Professor_Oak]

Could somebody please give me feedback on this essay? Be as harsh as you like, as long as you have constructive criticism and it isn't just berating me on my writing.

Australian English defines who we are as a nation and a culture. Discuss.

Spoiler

Australian English is possibly one of the most, if not the most distinctive variations of English. However we are a young nation and it is not simply whether Australian English is distinctive, but whether the vernacular reflects our culture as a whole. Through use of slang we express our cultural identity and values, while the rather homogenous nature of Australian English signifies that we are as Bruce Woodley so elegantly put it, ‘one and many’. Nonetheless what that ‘one’ group identity is differs depending on ethnic background, and a very different cultural identity can be shown through the language of those in separate ethnic communities.

The prevalence of slang in Australian English allows us to easily convey cultural attitudes and values in our daily language. Although slang is an integral part of any language, Australian slang can be used regardless of both social distance and status. Where other varieties of English leave slang for only the most informal of registers, Australian slang is even usable in politics. Take for instance John Howard’s use of ‘Howard’s battlers’ as a complimentary term for supporters of his 1996 campaign who were of the working class. From the term ‘battler’ we can see the classically Australian admiration of hard workers, especially those in adverse situations. Conversely through the idiom ‘cutting down tall poppies’, which means essentially putting down those who excel past their peers, it can be said that our language expresses strongly egalitarian ideals. In contrast with this we have developed a plethora of phrases pertaining to relaxation including ‘the land of the long weekend’, ‘don’t bust a gut’ and ‘she’ll be right’. Complaints are also generally frowned upon and thus the derogatory term ‘Whinger’ was created. Furthermore this term had another use in the amalgamation of ‘whingeing pom’ which firmly encapsulates the attitudes towards the British in the modern day. Moreover our cultural obsession with alcohol is demonstrated vividly by our use of colloquial terms including ‘shout’ ‘grog’ and ‘stubbie’. The slang explored here can be likened to a single raindrop in an ocean of terms, nevertheless it can be seen quite clearly how slang defines our cultural values.

As a nation our language is almost uniform signifying how a majority of the population shares a similar, but not necessarily the same, national identity. When juxtaposed with our colonial counterparts in America, we have very little variation in how we speak. If we look the phonetics of our speech it can be seen that there are common nation-wide trends, namely the shift of the /æ/ phoneme in ‘make’ to the /aɪ/ phoneme in ‘Mike’. There are however some considerable lexical differences, take for instance the expression ‘Toorak tractor’ which refers mockingly to a four-wheel drive vehicle which is driven around the city by the rich. ‘Toorak’ in this expression is replaced by other wealthy suburbs such as ‘Mosman’ in Sydney and ‘Dalkeith’ in Perth in order to keep it relevant. Some terms are not as transferrable as this as demonstrated by the Sydney derogatory term ‘westie’ for those who live in the western suburbs. While in Sydney the people in the western suburbs are typically of a lower socio-economic background, this may not apply to somewhere such as Perth and thus it is restricted to its place of origin. Similarly compounds pertaining to ‘stingers’ such as ‘stinger enclosure’ and ‘stinger suit’ are of no interest to say, a Melbournian as they only relate to the precautions those from tropical Queensland must take. It is evident here that although there are modifications due to the circumstances surrounding different areas, people from all ends of Australia tend to share some aspects of national identity through language.

As with any rule there are exceptions, and although mainstream Australians stick by the linguistic trends mentioned earlier, many ethnic groups have created their own vibrant ethnolects. In the 20th century immigrants from Southern Europe and Lebanon were met with rampant xenophobia on their arrival shown by the lexemes ‘wog’ and ‘lebo’. The retaliation for these terms was the establishment of ‘skip’, a derogatory term for Anglo-Celtic Australians. In the modern day however, young people of Southern European descent have used the label ‘wog’ affectionately for themselves, appropriating the stereotypes and connotations surrounding the lexeme. Although these youths come from a variety of backgrounds, they have a sense of group identity through their bi-cultural identity and thus speak in a very similar fashion. For example the /ð/ sound of the lexeme ‘them’ is frequently elided by ‘wogs’, whereas the final sound in the lexeme ‘pleasure is pronounced with an /ah/ phoneme. The inflectional suffix ‘-s’ is typically multiplied in informal conversation, for example ‘hey youse goings to Westfields?’ Furthermore the use of double comparatives is routine among ‘wogs’ with phrases such as ‘more better’ and ‘less stronger’ These distinguishing features have allowed young ‘wogs’ to create their own identity separate to both Anglo-Celtic Australians and their parents whom had experienced cultural cringe due to the initial xenophobia.

Identity is shown through language in countless different ways. It would be a terrible falsehood to say everybody in this country shares the same identity. Though there is a general national identity that may apply to the majority of the country through slang, differences in language both regional and ethnic tell us that this generalisation only goes so far. Ultimately a single Australian English cannot define the culture, nor the national identity, of a multicultural Australia.

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Australian English defines who we are as a nation and a culture. Discuss.
Australian English is possibly one of the most, if not the most distinctive variations of English. However we are a young nation and it is not simply whether Australian English is distinctive, but whether the vernacular reflects our culture as a whole. Through use of slang we express our cultural identity and values, while the rather homogenous nature of Australian English signifies that we are as Bruce Woodley so elegantly put it, ‘one and many’. Nonetheless what that ‘one’ group identity is differs depending on ethnic background, and a very different cultural identity can be shown through the language of those in separate ethnic communities.Add a final sentence. It seems as if you are listing paragraphs. Ie. A general sentence.

The prevalence of slang in Australian English allows us to easily convey cultural attitudes and values in our daily language.  Slang is an integral part of any language. Particularly in  Australia, slang can be used extensively in various contexts to enhance social distance and status. Where other varieties of English leave slang for only the most informal of registers, Australian slang is even usable in formal contexts , such as politics. Take For instance , John Howard’s use of ‘Howard’s battlers’ as a complimentary term for supporters of his 1996 campaign who were of the working class. I think you should use for contemporary examples. And also you should elaborate on how this “conveys cultural attitudes and values”. From the term ‘battler’ we can see the classically Australian admiration of hard workers, especially those in adverse situations. Conversely through the idiom ‘cutting down tall poppies’, which means essentially putting down those who excel past their peers, it can be said that our language expresses strongly egalitarian ideals. In contrast with this we have developed a plethora of phrases pertaining to relaxation including ‘the land of the long weekend’, ‘don’t bust a gut’ and ‘she’ll be right’. Maybe you could find an example in the media with popular Australian’s using it. Complaints are also generally frowned upon and thus the derogatory term ‘Whinger’ was created. Furthermore this term had another use in the amalgamation of ‘whingeing pom’ which firmly encapsulates the attitudes towards the British in the modern day. Moreover our cultural obsession with alcohol is demonstrated vividly by our use of colloquial terms including ‘shout’ ‘grog’ and ‘stubbie’. The slang explored here can be likened to a single raindrop in an ocean of terms, nevertheless it can be seen quite clearly how slang defines our cultural values. Even though it was a bit long, I really liked that final sentence ☺

As a nation our language is almost uniform signifying how a majority of the population shares a similar, but not necessarily the same, national identity. When juxtaposed with our colonial counterparts in America(there is a no need to use this, you never refer back to it in your essay) , we have very little variation in how we speak. If we look the phonetics of our speech it can be seen that there are common nation-wide trends, namely the shift of the /æ/ phoneme in ‘make’ to the /aɪ/ phoneme in ‘Mike’. I would avoid the use of “we” , it is informal.  There are however some considerable lexical differences, take for instance the expression ‘Toorak tractor’ which refers mockingly to a four-wheel drive vehicle which is driven around the city by the rich. ‘Toorak’ in this expression is replaced by other wealthy suburbs such as ‘Mosman’ in Sydney and ‘Dalkeith’ in Perth in order to keep it relevant. Some terms are not as transferrable as this as demonstrated by the Sydney derogatory term ‘westie’ for those who live in the western suburbs. While in Sydney the people in the western suburbs are typically of a lower socio-economic background, this may not apply to somewhere such as Perth and thus it is restricted to its place of origin. Similarly compounds pertaining to ‘stingers’ such as ‘stinger enclosure’ and ‘stinger suit’ are of no interest to say, a Melbournian as they only relate to the precautions those from tropical Queensland must take. It is evident here that although there are modifications due to the circumstances surrounding different areas, people from all ends of Australia tend to share some aspects of national identity through language.

As with any rule there are exceptions, and although mainstream Australians stick by the linguistic trends mentioned earlier, many ethnic groups have created their own vibrant ethnolects. (There is no link to the topic here. Each topic sentence should address the topic) .In the 20th century, immigrants from Southern Europe and Lebanon were met with rampant xenophobia on their arrival shown by the lexemes ‘wog’ and ‘lebo’.Examiners find these sort of examples quite overused , so you shouldn’t use them.  The retaliation for these terms was the establishment of ‘skip’, a derogatory term for Anglo-Celtic Australians. In the modern day however, young people of Southern European descent have used the label ‘wog’ affectionately for themselves, appropriating the stereotypes and connotations surrounding the lexeme. Although these youths come from a variety of backgrounds, they have a sense of group identity through their bi-cultural identity and thus speak in a very similar fashion manner. For example the /ð/ sound of the lexeme ‘them’ is frequently elided by ‘wogs’(bit too informal, use Lebanese Australian speakers) , whereas the final sound in the lexeme ‘pleasure is pronounced with an /ah/ phoneme.It is great that you are using IPA, it shows your deep knowledge and extensive research. Well done ! ☺ The inflectional suffix ‘-s’ is typically multiplied in informal conversation, for example ‘hey youse goings to Westfields?’ Furthermore the use of double comparatives is routine among ‘wogs’ (again informal) with phrases such as ‘more better’ and ‘less stronger’ . These distinguishing features have allowed young ‘wogs’ to create their own identity separate to both Anglo-Celtic Australians and their parents whom had experienced cultural cringe due to the initial xenophobia. (Final sentence is a bit too long, should cut it down a bit and relate to topic sentence)

Identity is shown through language in countless different ways. It would be a terrible falsehood to say everybody in this country shares the same identity. Though there is a general national identity that may apply to the majority of the country through slang, differences in language both regional and ethnic tell us that this generalisation only goes so far. Ultimately a single Australian English cannot define the culture, nor the national identity, of a multicultural Australia.

Just had a quick look 
Some improvements that can be made:
- USE CONTEMPORARY EXAMPLES !
- I would be wary of using “Lebspeak” as a primary example of an ethnolect. In the exam(2013) , I used Chinese, Sri Lankan and Indian English ethnolect varieties, as firstly they were a variety and they reflected the “Asian Age” that we are having in contemporary Australian society.
- Maybe you could have made the paragraph order with “slang” and “ethnolects “, and then “national identity” .
-I think your second argument was a bit weird. It provided a counter argument , but I was confused. It didn’t really address the topic clearly enough. I think you could have discussed colloquial Australian English( ie. Diminutives, swearing,etc)
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I didn't really go over grammatical/spelling mistakes, so bear with me! Hope this helps a bit !