Having a girlfriend/boyfriend in year 12?

[Will Sparks]

Do you guys think it's a good idea?

There's this chick I want to ask out but I'm not sure if it's a good idea because it may have a negative impact on my studies.

We've been pretty interested in each other for a while now and a lot of people know that, but I haven't really thought about it until my mate actually asked me, "When are you gonna ask her out?" so now I'm trying to decide whether I should or shouldn't.
She's also in year 12 by the way.

And by the way, there's nothing else I'm afraid of apart from my studies, so they're the only things I'm considering when I'm deciding whether or not I should do it.

I want to show you guys all the pros and cons that are in my mind right now.


PROS:
- I don't study on Friday and Saturday night, and if I'm not at home wasting my time on YouTube/Facebook/watching TV or something, I'll either be out with mates, at the footy or getting pissed or doing something else that's still pretty wasteful. So if I have a girlfriend, although I still won't be studying, it'll be better spending my night with her doing something 'nice' instead of getting pissed or watching like 5 hours of The Walking Dead on the internet lol.

- Hopefully I can go further than a kiss? Lol I'm sorry if it's a bit 'inappropriate' but it's definitely a pro, and you guys know that.

- Someone to spend meaningful time with and develop an emotional bond with?
Yeah, I've never had a girlfriend and never got to know a girl really well, and I heard that if you have relationships earlier in your life, it'll help down the track with being able to understand girls and other stuff like that lol.


CONS:
- Distraction from schoolwork? i.e. Waste time out with her when I should be studying?

- If we breakup/she dumps me before a SAC or the exams, maybe it'll have a really big impact on my score?



That's about all I can think from the top of my head for now.
Came home after footy training at like 5:30, relaxed til 6 then had dinner, then did 3 hours straight of just chemistry lol (got a SAC on Thursday!!) so I'm pretty tired at the moment.

Anyway, if you guys have anymore pros and cons you can suggest, please post them below and more importantly, tell me if I should ask her out or not and WHY!


Thanks in advance.

[brenden]

Tbh it's a personal decision. I had a girlfriend all throughout Year 12 and it was definitely a +. She helped me keep from bouncing off the walls when I got down etc. However, we started dating in 2011 so any 'honeymoon phase' was dealt with and didn't impact my studies. It's under your control imo. It will only influence your studies if you let it. Even if you breakup before a SAC, you need to maintain a certain level of detachment or acceptance of your emotions before all assessment tasks. Fear, heartbreak, anger, disappointment, you can walk into a SAC with a bunch of different emotions but you just have to put it out of mind. There are no cons if you simply decide NOT to waste time with her if you should be studying.

[chasej]

I see no reason why you shouldn't really. If you are both interested in each other it wouldn't be good to waste the opportunity considering after year 12 you may never see each other again. So why not go for it?

If you find it impacting on studies than you should just try to work out a timetable so you can always fit in study during the day.

[lala1911]

I don't have any experience in this area as I actually haven't had a girlfriend for a few years now lol    .. but here's my thoughts on the issue.

If you feel as if the relationship is going somewhere and it's not distracting you with your studies, you should continue, however if it's becoming one of those ridiculously 'lovey dovey' flick crap relationships where you're obsessed with each other, sitting on each others laps for eight hours and wagging school, then you should definitely cancel it. I can imagine having a girlfriend that takes her studies seriously better, as she would understand the pressures of wanting to score highly.. external pressures to score highly from family.. etc etc..

[monica_]

I just happen to have search a few words including 'vce' one time and came across this link:
http://survivingvce.wordpress.com/2012/01/13/relationships-and-the-vce-could-love-be-any-crazier/

[spectroscopy]

do it dude its a good release from all the stresses of work and stuff and having a girlfriends nice LOL
you wont see each other every day so youl still have plenty of time to do hw, or you could do hw together (LOL LIKE THAT WOULD BE PRODUCTIVE)
personally im for it, im only year 11 but doing a 3/4 at a select entry school and i think that my vce would be more glum without my gf but i dont have much of a social life anyway in terms of parties and going out (HAHA) so take my advice with a grain of salt

[walkec]

My brother did year 12 last year and had a girlfriend all through year 11 and year 12 (both of them are even doing the same course at the same uni-how cute)

I think it was good for him, not only for some downtime from study, but also so he could manage his time more efficiently. He'd spend Saturday afternoons with her, so he'd get up early on Saturday to get work done and work on Saturday nights when he wasn't at parties getting pissed  he and his girlfriend even did most of the same subjects so when they were at my place they'd study together too.

I'm kind of in a sticky situation myself with the whole relationship in VCE thing. My boyfriend doesn't really work all that hard, like he passes but doesn't get great marks. But I'm the complete opposite, I work so hard, I get marks that reflect it. I'm happy at the moment, but I wonder if my relationship will cause me more stress next year when doing year 12 but only time will tell. I think it does make me plan my time more efficiently too 

[NekMennit]

I guess it's okay if she's also in year 12, cause she'll also be focusing on her studies which means you'll have to as well.

[Russ]

I don't think you can deny it takes away time from your studies, but are you really going to use the thinking of "why have a relationship when I can study/work/X" until you're middle aged?

[Special At Specialist]

or you could do hw together (LOL LIKE THAT WOULD BE PRODUCTIVE)

Haha I was going to suggest this. A few times in VCE, me and my friends would visit each others' houses to study, mainly for maths/science subjects, and we were surprisingly pretty productive at it. My parents always used to make comments about how it's inevitable that we will get distracted and not accomplish anything, but most of the time, they were wrong. I think I worked a lot harder there than I would if I was at home, because there was a large table with a lot of space to study, away from distractions, and having other year 12 students around you who also want to do well gives you a boost of motivation.

So it is possible to study with friends productively... I can't really comment on having a girlfriend because I've been single my whole life but it can work with friends, so I'd imagine that it could also work with a girlfriend, especially if she's doing the same subjects as you.

[Hoodfox]

I had a girlfriend in year 12. It was a largely positive experience, because we understood Year 12 came first.

[BigAl]

right hand rule?

[FlorianK]

Don't see bad points in it and a friend of mine and his girlfriend aced VCE together. She got .95 he .65 and they were rank 1 and 2 for UMEP math!

[thushan]

Haha, a girlfriend in Year 12 would be a good idea, so long as she complements your studies rather than detracts from them. If not, you could think of the possible trade-off "is it worth spending this amount of time with gf and losing X hours of study?"

[jeanweasley]

If you can handle it, then it'd be fine. But it's your decision, as long as you know your priorities, you should be alright.
Good luck! I hope she says yes to you.