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Author Topic: Oral: Cartoon Analysis Feedback  (Read 1516 times)  Share 

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IndefatigableLover

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Oral: Cartoon Analysis Feedback
« on: February 08, 2014, 10:30:26 pm »
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Hey so this was written by me a LONG time ago (> 6 months) and I felt I wanted some fresh feedback on it just to see what I can improve on I guess. And I wasn't too sure if it was necessary to include bits and pieces in the speech (like my intro since it's not a part of the cartoon but from the article it was linked in...)





During late April of 2013, Britain's Chief Medical Officer announced that “antibiotic resistance should be ranked with terrorism as one of the major threats to society.” Sharing this opinion was the World Health Organisation (WHO) where in 2011 they made it their focus to avoid regressing to the pre-antibiotic era by introducing “a six-point policy package to combat the spread of antimicrobial resistance.” However most of the general public have very little idea on what this situation is about and how serious it could get later on in the future.

This cartoon published in the ‘Sydney Morning Herald’ on April 30th 2013 by cartoonist Pat Campbell under the title ‘Silent threat of the superbug’ comments on the looming future of antibiotics due to antibiotic resistance from bacteria. The tone is light-hearted and satirical using the imposing figure of bacteria swamping the diminutive doctor and his patient to convey the sense of urgency in the situation. Campbell’s target audience is predominantly the general public with an emphasis on the working class who are old enough to purchase medicines and antibiotics to cure their diseases and illnesses.

Most notable in this cartoon is the juxtaposition of the two key figures. The ‘shield’ associates itself with defence and protection and here it symbolises the role that antibiotics have which is to safeguard the ‘infected’. However the holes and cracks in the shield deliver the message that the security offered by antibiotics has begun to be breached by the commanding force of bacteria. Shaped and behaving like typical angler fish, the bacteria represent danger or in other words the ‘enemy’ as it overwhelms and surrounds the shield in all directions. On the contrary, bacteria are very miniscule as a whole yet Campbell has drawn them to be nearly of the same size as the shield. The suggestion therefore is that this occurrence is a negative one due to the sheer dominance demonstrated by the bacteria. 

Campbell has chosen to concentrate most of the colour that appears in the cartoon in the shield which guards the doctor and his patient. The intended effect is to gain the audience’s attention due to the colour dominance displayed in that specific region in the cartoon. Looking in detail, the shield is not bright blue but rather there are patches of brown which indicate to the audience that the shield is imperfect due to the holes and discolouring of the shield. Lastly, the shading of the bacteria contrasts with the purple-pink background which adds to the foreboding feel to the cartoon in an upbeat manner.

Complementing the complexion of the cartoon is the exaggerated look on the patient. Campbell is satirising death which the patient exhibits that are characterised by the bulging eyes and the tongue hanging out in a comical manner. Accompanied with an intravenous drip (IV drip), the patient has a sense of vulnerability which is obvious as the doctor stands over his patient. Cowering behind the shield, the doctor is obviously distressed and puzzled by the overpowering force of the bacteria surrounding himself and his patient. Campbell has drawn the doctor as if they have no clue on how to react to the situation suggesting the possibility that doctors also play an important role in this dire situation.

Both individuals are dressed stereotypically where the patient has a blanket draped over them whilst the doctor is a middle-aged man dressed in the usual surgical gown equipped with a stethoscope and a light reflector. In essence, Campbell is initiating what is known as ‘farce’ to the audience due to the portrayal of the patient giving off the exaggerated expression of death and the stereotyping of particular characters in reality.

While this cartoon may be glossed over as a simple depiction of what the future may hold for antibiotics, a deeper meaning can be read when the universality of the figures are accepted. Employing a variety of persuasive and visual techniques, it can be concluded that Campbell may not only be commenting on the nature of how our doctors are going about treating their patients as well as warn the general public that we should not dismiss bacteria as harmless agents but instead recognise it as a troublesome force where in the future it could eventually take control of the ‘universe’ that is the human race and ultimately bring it to a standstill once and for all. 

literally lauren

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Re: Oral: Cartoon Analysis Feedback
« Reply #1 on: February 09, 2014, 08:12:21 pm »
+3

This cartoon published in the ‘Sydney Morning Herald’ on April 30th 2013 by cartoonist Pat Campbell under the title ‘Silent threat of the superbug’ comments on the looming future of antibiotics due to antibiotic resistance from bacteria. The tone is light-hearted and satiricalI would contest this, though there are light-hearted/ quirky cartoonish figures, the colouring of the shield and the palpable danger the patient is in suggests a quite sinister and life-threatening situation. using the imposing figure of bacteria swamping the diminutive doctor and his patient to convey the sense of urgency in the situation. Very good, but how does that make the audience feel? Also would be too specific for an intro, but I'm assuming that's because you cut stuff out. Campbell’s target audience is predominantly the general public with an emphasis on the working class who are old enough to purchase medicines and antibiotics to cure their diseases and illnesses. This seems tacked on at the end here. Try to deal with the target audience when it comes up organically ie. when you discuss the patient, as this who the audience are likely to associate with.

Most notable in this cartoon is the juxtaposition of the two key figures. which figures? are you talking about the doctor/patient or the shield/bacteria? transition is clunky here The ‘shield’ associates itself with defense and protection and here it symbolises the role that antibiotics have which is to safeguard the ‘infected’consider synonyms here: ill, sick, unwell, 'infected' is a little too negative. However the holes and cracks in the shield deliver the message that the security offered by antibiotics has begun to be breached by the commanding force of bacteria. Shaped and behaving like typical angler fish, (?) the bacteria represent danger or in other words the ‘enemy’ as it overwhelms and surrounds the shield in all directions. On the contrary, bacteria are very miniscule as a whole yet Campbell has drawn them to be nearly of the same size as the shield. The suggestion therefore is that this occurrence is a negative try to go for a stronger word here, 'negative' is pretty pedestrian one due to the sheer dominance demonstrated by the bacteria. Therefore... what is the audience forced to conclude about medical science/research?

Campbell has chosen to concentrate most of the colour that appears in the cartoon in the shield which guards the doctor and his patient. The intended effect is to gain the audience’s attention due to the colour dominance displayed in that specific region in the cartoon. Looking in detail, the shield is not bright blue but rather there are patches of brown which indicate to the audience that the shield is imperfect due to the holes and discolouring of the shield.Rephrase this: The tainted colouring of the shield also contributess to the sense of damage and imperfection. Lastly, the shading of the bacteria contrasts with the purple-pink background which adds to the foreboding feel to the cartoon in an upbeat manner.also worth discussing the holes in more detail, eg. the connotations of gaps in protection.

Complementing the complexion of the cartoon is the exaggerated look on the patient. Campbell is satirising is he? death which the patient exhibits that are characterised by the bulging eyes and the tongue hanging out in a comical manner. Accompanied with an intravenous drip (IV drip), the patient has a sense of vulnerability which is obvious as the doctor stands over his patient. Cowering behind the shield, the doctor is obviously distressed and puzzled by the overpowering force of the bacteria surrounding himself and his patient. Campbell has drawn the doctor as if they have no clue on how to react to the situation suggesting the possibility that doctors also play an important role in this dire situation.

Both individuals are dressed stereotypically where the patient has a blanket draped over them whilst the doctor is a middle-aged man dressed in the usual surgical gown equipped with a stethoscope and a light reflector. In essence, Campbell is initiating what is known as ‘farce’ to the audience due to the portrayal of the patient giving off the exaggerated expression of death and the stereotyping of particular characters in reality. Yes, but why?? What does this make the audience think/feel about the issue?

While this cartoon may be glossed over as a simple depiction of what the future may hold for antibiotics, a deeper meaning can be read when the universality of the figures are accepted. Employing a variety of persuasive and visual techniques, it can be concluded that Campbell may not only be commenting on the nature of how our doctors are going about treating their patients as well as but also warn the general public that we should not dismiss bacteria as harmless agents but instead recognise it as a troublesome more than 'troublesome.' Try 'malevolent' 'sinister' 'threatening' force where in the future it could eventually take control of the ‘universe’ that is the human race and ultimately bring it to a standstill once and for all. very long for a concluding sentence, the last bit isn't entirely relevant or substantiated.

Pretty good overall, I'm attributing the iffy cohesion to the "bits and pieces you've removed." It's good to practice your visual analytical skills, but you'll never be asked to analyse an image on its own, so try to find one embedded in an article so that you can work on comparing/contrasting multiple contentions.
There are some syntax issues, and you could work on improving your vocab to maximise your mark, but the major issue is that you focus too much on what the author is doing, and this can at times lapse into summary. You need to tie it back to the audience, especially at the end of your paragraphs. You deal with the techniques but then leave it hanging; try to spend more time on how this persuades the audience.
Other than that, your ability to wring meaning out of a relatively tricky image is very impressive.
Hope that helps :)

IndefatigableLover

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Re: Oral: Cartoon Analysis Feedback
« Reply #2 on: February 09, 2014, 08:52:44 pm »
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Pretty good overall, I'm attributing the iffy cohesion to the "bits and pieces you've removed." It's good to practice your visual analytical skills, but you'll never be asked to analyse an image on its own, so try to find one embedded in an article so that you can work on comparing/contrasting multiple contentions.
There are some syntax issues, and you could work on improving your vocab to maximise your mark, but the major issue is that you focus too much on what the author is doing, and this can at times lapse into summary. You need to tie it back to the audience, especially at the end of your paragraphs. You deal with the techniques but then leave it hanging; try to spend more time on how this persuades the audience.
Other than that, your ability to wring meaning out of a relatively tricky image is very impressive.
Hope that helps :)
Ooh I can definitely see what I can improve here and yes my vocabulary is really limited (which is a pain but I hope to improve it asap [especially with the documents you've uploaded LOL]) but thank you very much for critiquing my work lauren9460! :DD

vox nihili

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Re: Oral: Cartoon Analysis Feedback
« Reply #3 on: February 09, 2014, 08:57:48 pm »
+1
There's been a hell of a lot about this on the ABC and other Australian media lately, so given that you did this 6 months ago, I suggest you have a squiz at them.

It'd definitely be better for you to come up with Australian examples rather than the British chief medical officer (if you can of course—and you can) :)
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IndefatigableLover

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Re: Oral: Cartoon Analysis Feedback
« Reply #4 on: February 09, 2014, 09:19:01 pm »
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There's been a hell of a lot about this on the ABC and other Australian media lately, so given that you did this 6 months ago, I suggest you have a squiz at them.

It'd definitely be better for you to come up with Australian examples rather than the British chief medical officer (if you can of course—and you can) :)
Haha the actual picture came from this article back in April last year LOL (well we were only given the image in hardcopy but I did a Google Image search to find this article and referred to it a bit at the start) but I definitely see where you're coming from Mr. T-Rav! The article does mention a few Australian examples in there s it's my bad on my behalf T_T

vox nihili

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Re: Oral: Cartoon Analysis Feedback
« Reply #5 on: February 09, 2014, 09:35:21 pm »
+1
Haha the actual picture came from this article back in April last year LOL (well we were only given the image in hardcopy but I did a Google Image search to find this article and referred to it a bit at the start) but I definitely see where you're coming from Mr. T-Rav! The article does mention a few Australian examples in there s it's my bad on my behalf T_T

Absolutely it does! I just noticed that you said you'd written it six months ago, but there have actually been some really good things pop up in the last six months about this topic as ID experts start to get more concerned about it. So you may even have some more examples from Aus to talk about :)

Definitely keep WHO though.
2013-15: BBiomed (Biochemistry and Molecular Biology), UniMelb
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