'Quality literature presents the reader with a unique perspective on common human experiences.'
To what extent does the central character's unique perspective provide an insight into the thematic concerns of Maestro?It is the extraordinary power of quality literature to transcend contextual boundaries through its uniquely rendered perspectives that attributes to a text's enduring appeal.
Nice introductory sentence! Flow nicely, raises some good ideas and clearly a Module B sentence. Resonating with a nuanced masculine perspective regarding the personal frustration and tribulations that are archetypal to the development of an individual’s maturity, Peter Goldsworthy’s ‘Maestro’ examines the complexities associated with the central character’s experiences at the precipice of an Australian childhood and adulthood during the late 1960s.
Make sure you aren't being OVERLY verbose - Picking the long and big words isn't always as effective as stating something more simply. Critiquing the artistic temperament in relation to the pressures of materialism and technical perfection as an inconsequential source of growth, this bildungsroman promulgates introspection as the most valuable form of education through extolling its ability to enhance an individual’s morality. Influenced by a repressed sense of anxiety and distrust that characterised the post-World War II period, Goldsworthy presents the corrosive impact of trauma as a paradigm yet to be understood by contemporary society, presaging a deeper understanding within responders of the acute disillusionment and escapism that ensues in the wake of life’s adversities. Through ideological disparities, this lack of mutual understanding is illuminated within the dysfunctionality of relationships, in which Goldsworthy utilises as a medium to explore the dichotomies inherent in not only artistry, but reality. By offering unorthodox insights into quintessential experiences of the human condition, Goldsworthy’s exploration of such thematic concerns invites responders to grow with the central character, allowing it to retain its enduring value.
Overall an extremely effective introduction, if not a tad too long (if you can handle it in the room, great!) Also be sure that you are really clearly and obviously answering the question - For you I think this will come from simplifying things a little and just trying to make your point in a way that is ever so slightly more simple. Even just including the phrase - Common human experiences doesn't appear anywhere in the response, which is weird because it is the question 
Goldsworthy’s ‘Maestro’ examines the complexities associated with the corrosive impact of trauma through emphasis on the disparities between its perception and reality, challenging responders with a confronting but authentic portrayal of this internal conflict.
Good introduction! Again though, I'd like you to include the key phrase of "common human experience" or something similar to it, to make it clear to the marker that you are responding to it. After Keller’s misplaced faith in the Nazi regime ultimately resulted in the annihilation of his family, Paul’s complex and merciless relationship with Keller elevates the irrevocable damage that manifests in not only his physicality, but also his cynicism in humanity. Initially, Paul quickly condemns Keller with crude dismissals in the metaphorical reference "boozer with cheap ruined leather", failing to interpret his physicality in a mature and compassionate way – rather adopting a condescending tone in expressing concern for only himself.
Be careful - Although you are using quotes and techniques you aren't really analysing conceptually, you are exploring what we learn about the characters. This doesn't quite explore how the ideas you discussed earlier are communicate to the audience. Though vicarious perceptions are not tantamount to first hand experiences of trauma, the diction of "tortured" in Paul’s later description of Keller as a "tortured, booze ruined face", suggests Paul's newfound understanding and respect for him after becoming cognisant of the gravity of his experiences, finally conceding that Keller possesses some aspect of humanity, as opposed to being just “cheap”.
The thing that makes it clear you are text focused is that you are suggesting "Paul's" newfound understanding, you are basing everything around the characters and events. You need to abstract from that and just say, "Hey, this is what the composer wants to do and this is how we do it. This incongruity between Keller’s forged and authentic identity highlights the ease of trauma to be concealed with a mere façade, in spite of its internal severity on the individual.
This is better, you are taking a character and using them to drive a broader idea. Furthermore, the satirical metaphor in Paul’s impression of the photographs garnered in Keller’s “textbooks” as a “bleak human landscape located somewhere between Tragedy and Dumb Stupidity” elucidates Keller’s perception of such frivolities as an extrapolation of all human society, illuminating that his acute displacement of preconceived notions is in fact a manifestation of trauma.
Try not to attribute perspectives to characters - When you are discussing perspectives and the techniques that shake them, it NEEDS to be the composer. Your composer should be mentioned far more than any character. It is not until Keller approaches his death that ensues Paul’s introspective realisations of his appreciation for Keller’s detriments and presence in their entirety.
Retell, this is just telling me something about the story. This is pertinent in the asyndeton and cumulation in detail as Paul describes his physical deterioration, "the incandescent redness had gone, the broken vessels seemed bleached, all colour had drained" in which he emphasises the profound loss he is about to endure, illuminating the extent to which he valued Keller's insight and experiences, albeit traumatic. In provoking introspective discoveries and crucial growth, it is through Paul's sentiments in relation to the corrosive impact of Keller’s trauma that allows responders to seek an authentic understanding of its perception and reality.
A really interesting concept, but I think it needs to be linked to the question a bit more, and your analysis is slightly too text focused!Goldsworthy’s depiction of relational dissonance is testament to the reverberation of the internal conflict that is prominent throughout an individual’s life in the wake of trauma.
Another well stated concept. Utilising Paul as a lens, responders can sense that Keller’s inability to exhibit any semblance of functional love clearly emanates from the horrors engulfing his past, as portrayed in his dwelling on, “better a small hurt now then a wasted life” – the juxtaposition between the miniscule “hurt” and the grandiose nature of a “wasted life” emphasising the significant extent of his belief in this concept.
Getting on the longer end of sentences here - Watch length. Short and punchy can be really effective. Keller’s perpetuation of this idea towards Paul largely attributes to the dysfunctionality of their relationship, which Paul epitomises in his metaphorical reference to Keller “revealing perfections to me, but at the same time snatching it away.”
Retell, you are telling me about the characters and popping a technique at the end but not really telling me what is being communicated by the composer? This positions the responder with the vision that though Paul clearly will never develop the level of mastery necessary to succeed internationally as a pianist, Keller’s fatalistic attitude only exacerbates this inadequate potential, contradicting the conventional model of relationships.
Try not to focus so much on the characters - Relying less on the characters will let you streamline your arguments to a simpler combo of "Technique, explain what it does, audience impact," and therefore get more done. The character experiences are irrelevant! This is further reflected in Paul’s dissatisfaction with Keller’s admonitions, described in the way in which he “crumpled the letter into a tight ball and tossed it into the bin”, highlighting Paul’s immature frustration about Keller’s unequivocally cynical stances on his musical abilities.
Retell - You are picking apart the characters! However, the following morning, Paul’s introspective perusals are illustrated in the self-contemplative language as he “unpeeled the ball of paper carefully, like a mandarin, then read through to the end”, facilitating his bitter recognition of the fact that Keller’s comments were indeed correct.
Retell, you are listing the events of the story in order with some additional details. This isn't going to get you marks! The diction of “carefully” and simile of “mandarin” symbolises their relationship to responders as one characterised by tough love, requiring circumspection and patience to achieve relational effectiveness in its entirety.
What does this show the responders? What do we learn? Evidently, with Paul’s increasing erosion of complacency comes the feeling that he is “finally beginning to gain some sort of understanding of the man”, suggesting that his gradual identification of his moral shortcomings is parallel to the progression of their unconventional relationship.
Ensure all techniques have quotes! It is Paul’s unique experience with Keller that allows the responder to develop a complex understanding of the capacity of relationship dissonance to exert moral growth and maturity.
Try to make concluding sentences conceptually broad and non text specific, that way the idea can exist beyond the text itself, which is a better style to adopt!By reaffirming conventional morality through providing a guilt-ridden transgression of it, Keller’s prevalent resort to alcoholism examines the necessity for escapism when individuals are confronted by extreme circumstances opposing the ideals of the human condition. Adopting an escapist mentality, Keller’s behaviour seen through Paul’s shifting perspective compel responders to perceive him through the entanglements of trauma rather than the simplicities of basic human response.
What does this show us about human experience more generally. Try and make those broader links regularly. During Paul's migration to Darwin, he becomes overwhelmed by the deficiency of order within the Swan Hotel; it clearly juxtaposes that of Adelaide, hence the implication of physical excessiveness in the diction of "overgrown", "crumbling" and "spilling".
Retell. This implication elicits a sense of claustrophobia, emphasising Paul's seclusion and unfamiliarity within such an environment – the negative connotation suggesting his contempt for its corruption. While the dominance of unrestrained alcoholism is a depiction of Darwin's socially unhealthy culture, the chaos inherent in the metaphorical reference of "noise spilling out of the front bar onto the garden" portrays the city as the epitome of youth and recklessness to responders.
Good, this is a better bit of analysis because it is focusing more on what the audience learns about themselves and something they relate to, not necessarily to a fictional character. Thus, the fact that Keller–an elite symbol of musical excellence and wisdom–resides in such an oppressive environment emphasises the extremities he has extended himself to in order to maintain his sanity, illuminating to responders the way in which he utilises alcoholism as a means of escape.
What does this show about overcoming adversity more broadly? When the cyclone hits Darwin, the symbolic imagery evoked through the use of anaphora and polysyndeton in his description of Keller’s survival “by sheltering beneath the supine, beneath his grand piano, his beloved Bosendorfer, wet and shivering and lacerated” represents the extent to which he relies on the piano as a source of sanctity to escape the reality of his emotions. Where once Keller was betrayed by his music-driven lifestyle, it also provides a means that, figuratively and literally, saved his life. Evidently, Paul’s unique observations of Keller’s predominant reliance on these entities as a means to diminish his guilt-driven conscience allows responders to consider the extent of the psychological ramifications that trauma imposes on individuals.
The conclusion featuring the characters but not the composer is the big piece of evidence that we are too text focused.While Paul equivocates between introspection and egotistical disregard, his vicarious exposure to unorthodox experiences of the human condition–the corrosive impacts of trauma, its ability to erode the functionality of relationships and the need for escapism–progressively become definitive parallels to his development into maturity. This uniquely rendered perspective compels responders to not only engage in this process of maturation, but also allows them to understand the underlying sense of distrust and anxieties that characterised the post-World War II period, thus rendering ‘Maestro’ as a text of enduring significance.
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Topic: English Advanced Essay Marking (Modules Only) (Read 611591 times)