What are your experience with formal, valedictory etc.?

[Joseph41]

I guess some of the "privileges" of rising up the high school ranks is being exposed to stuff like formals, valedictories, graduation and the like. And I'm interested in how this changes from school-to-school, and whether you had any other similar events. For me:

FORMALS:
We had our first one in Year 10. I can't remember where it was, but the venue was pretty small and the dance floor matched it. We had awards for, like, "most likely to get married" and stuff (they've just broken up - doesn't say much for the rest of us). I'm sure I would have left pretty early. Year 11 - similar thing. I think this was actually my favourite formal, though; it was held at San Remo Ballroom and, therefore, just had a lot more space to spread out. Less gross. I don't remember much of our Year 12 formal but I'm pretty sure I had a terrible time for a number of reasons lol.

VALEDICTORY:
Had this before we received our results - not sure if that's the same for other schools? But it made it all a bit weird, because it was also before exams. It was like, "yeee boiii we're done - oh wait, no we're not." Had our teachers and families there. Everybody from our year was called up to receive a certificate. In hindsight, I have no idea what that certificate was - "good job for almost finishing" or similar, I guess.

All in all, I'm glad I went to all of the above, even though when I think back I go, "ehgehheghhhh". I don't have the fondest of memories of any of them, really, but they were experiences.

How about you? 🤔

[Calebark]

Yr 10:
This was my first formal. I can't actually remember where it was held, but it was a pretty spacey venue. I think there were about eight to a table. I knew everybody on the table, so it was an easy-going experience. Everyone on the table was in a couple, from memory. I remember the food being the best part of the night tbh -- the dessert was like a giant Ferrero Rocher ball filled with ice cream. As soon as dessert was served, the music started playing, so the entire table got up to dance except for my date and I because, well, it was a really good dessert. The music was mostly the top 100, which annoyed me a lot back then, but I still spent most the night dancing. We had trivial award things, like 'most likely to win a Nobel prize' (spoiler alert: the winner does not have a Nobel prize yet), which were pretty fun. I had a fun night, but out of all the formal events, it was probably my least favourite because I was a lot more quiet and less outgoing back then, so I felt a bit uncomfortable.

Yr 11/12:
We didn't have formals for these years in my school. Some of my friends did deb, but from memory these were not through the school, so I won't comment. Is it normal to have formals in Yr 11 and 12? I thought it was just a Yr 10 thing.

Valedictory:
My valedictory experience was a bit unique. For starters, I never put in a deposit/form to attend valedictory because I was a) not graduating that year (altho I attended 2016 graduation, not 2017 graduation) and b) homeless, so couldn't spare the money. Right before exams, a coordinator approached me and asked if I was attending val, so I said no and whatnot. They said they could pull some strings and the school would pay for me, so I said yes. I was pretty happy about it. Unfortunately, by the time it rolled around, I just got out of hospital for pneumonia, so I could not attend. I was temporarily living with my best friend's family at this point, so I just spent it with her cats. From what I heard about the night, they handed out awards for highest achievers in a subject. I ended up picking up my Biology award after my Biology exam. I can't really comment much more on the night, obviously. My night's experience ended in being woken up by a bunch of friends barging into the room I was in, forcing me to get dressed, and us all going out to drink to celebrate. Despite not going to the actual val, it ended on a high note, because I celebrated being done with the year, which is essentially what it's all about.

[fantasticbeasts3]

At my school, we had formals in years 10 and 12. No valedictories - idk if that's a term we use in NSW but we just call it graduation... I think? Might vary across schools.

Year 10 formal was organised by two girls and their parents, and the general consensus was that it was an average night - not amazing, but not awful either. I wouldn't know how that night was because I didn't go.

Year 12 formal was organised by my school, and I don't know about others but I had a great night. Our formal was 1.5 weeks after the HSC, so it had been a while since most had seen their friends and in general it was really nice to catch up with everyone! The venue was decent and the only problem with it was they didn't put on music (like dance music) until all the food was served. I think the actual event started at ~6.30, food started being served around 7, and there was no music until almost 9 lol.

[Aaron]

Didn't have a formal, didn't go to deb, went to valedictory and it was average at best. I remember the crappy food and receiving a subject award, that's about it. Perks of a underfunded public school in a low-mid SES area.

i really need access to more emojis, specifically the hand ones... then this post would be truly complete

[spectroscopy]

year 10 social was fucking lit everyone wore suits and it was just good vibes all around cos no one had really been to anything like that before
year 11 was even MORE lit cos it was half outdoors and a people were a bit more cool and it was way more casual but still crazy
year 12 formal was nice but it was basically just an evening of taking photos with each other
year 12 valedictory was a nice way to finish off school but people mostly sat with their parents at their table

i cant remember any speeches or awards at any of these tbh

[sarangiya]

We had our first formal/social in Year 9. It was the first "night" in which our all-girls school and our partner all-boys school got together. We had to attend practices for four weeks or so after school to learn ballroom dancing lol. It was, as you would imagine, super awkward but quite a fun experience. Much of the same can be said for the actual night.
In Year 10 we had another social which was a little more fun because our two schools had gotten to know each other better. More people were going out with each other, or were friends with each other, so it was much less awkward. No ballroom dancing this time!
Instead of a formal for Year 11, as many of you have mentioned, we had a debutante. As this wasn't organised through the school, it wasn't complusory to attend or participate in. Most did, though, and most partnered with the boys school students, including myself. Similar to year 9, we had weeks of ballroom dancing practice and honestly those were great fun. The night was actually more stressful than anything. The food was average. At the time, it was great. In hindsight, it was a lot of money and there is this unspoken rule: don't do Deb with your boyfriend. If you're reading this and doing your Deb next year or something... the rule is there for a reason.
Year 12 has a couple of events. Our partner school's Year 12 Formal already came and went (I didn't go). Our one is in August. Like spectroscopy said, apparently it is mostly for pictures. It is also a sitting down event, which is a first since the Deb.
As for valedictory-kimd of events, we have Graduation Dinner before exams. This is just for the Year 12s and teachers, and it's quite the formal event. More photos. Unit 4 academic prizes are given out, along with formal awards that recognise community service, leadership, and academic excellence. I believe we also get our rings, that have the school crest on them.
After exams, we have Graduation Mass. The invitation to attend is extended to family and friends and is held at the local cathedral. The students wear uniforms, and accept gifts like flower crowns made by the junior years, candles, etc. and sing hymns etc. This is the official "send-off" but there is little student contribution to the ceremony.
The year after, in Term 1 of the following academic year, there is the academic awards ceremony. This is where the overall subject awards, over 90 ATAR awards and dux are announced. The dux makes a speech which officially ends the Year 12s presence at the school, and welcomes the new academic year in.

[Bri MT]

Year 10 Formal
This happenned but I didn't go to it. Apparently people had fun

Deb
Got cancelled due to insufficient numbers.  People organised private ones and I supported my two best friends by being a guest but didn't do my own.  They seemed really happy and were excited about it for a long time but I don't regret not doing it.  The whole "[name] child of [parent] and [parent] who enjoys [activity] and is hoping to [career]" was overly ritualistic and traditional imo, but it was nice that people were able to only have 1 parent stated if both weren't applicable. 
 
Other school's formal
I attended the year 12 formal of a different school in year 11 as a guest. It was incredibly fancy and since it was near the end of term 3 a decent chunk of it was filled with nostalgia and in jokes. It was awkward for a range of reasons & that probably didn't help the experience. 

Graduation
This was after everyone had finished exams and just before people started going on schoolies. The only award was the VCE certificate,  but we got the yearbook, a graduation photoframe for people to sign, the school leaver's guide, short speeches & a reminder about change of preferences. It was held in the same venue as the private debs and followed a food>official stuff > food > dancing + dessert schedule. It was good to see most people again & to celebrate exams being over

[heids]

I dunno what all these different nights are, but we only had one year 12 formal (sounds like the equivalent of most vals, maybe?)

For me it was really difficult because I had no money full stop.  The school and a friend paid for me to go, and I borrowed a dress/shoes/jewellery from another friend's sister, who also did my hair.  I enjoyed the night because I liked my classmates and it was a new experience, but I felt guilty and ashamed, really.  Everyone else bought a new dress (suit in guys' cases) and got their hair done professionally, while I, as always at the time, was relying on others completely for a sub-standard final result.

If that makes sense lol

[sarangiya]

For me it was really difficult because I had no money full stop.  The school and a friend paid for me to go, and I borrowed a dress/shoes/jewellery from another friend's sister, who also did my hair.  I enjoyed the night because I liked my classmates and it was a new experience, but I felt guilty and ashamed, really.  Everyone else bought a new dress (suit in guys' cases) and got their hair done professionally, while I, as always at the time, was relying on others completely for a sub-standard final result.

I know what you mean. Just about all of my clothes are from my cousin, including dresses and outfits I wore to the formals (for deb I tried to use my other cousin's, but it was too expensive to alter and we bought a cheap new one). My make-up and hair also set by the same cousin. It must be different because as family those clothes were handed down to me for ownership, and the hair/make-up was a favour. I can understand that a friend's sister might be more difficult emotionally to deal with.
But I just wanted to say, even if you thought you looked (and indeed perhaps, felt) sub-standard, I'm sure that your friend's sister was more than happy to make you look beautiful on a special night. Even though it might feel like you're imposing on someone, for them it might be a great pleasure to help you out. You would gladly do the same thing for someone in your position, right? There's not so much we can do about how you felt in the past, but I hope you can ease your worries now by thinking that her help was probably gladly offered, and your gratitude was worth it all anyway

[K888]

I never did my deb - fake tan and having dancing lessons every Tuesday after school for a term never appealed to me and I thought it was a waste of money haha. My school also had senior formal (years 11-12) and valedictory. I did senior formal in year 12 because I wanted to make sure I experienced as much as possible before finishing high school. It was fun, took plenty of photos with friends, but I got a bit bored towards the end and ended up just texting my dad to come pick me up a bit early haha.

Valedictory was great, we had ours the day after muck up day (so before exams). We'd already had our prize giving assembly for subject awards so it was just a night to celebrate that we'd all successfully got through VCE and all got our graduation certificates. Got a new dress, had hair and makeup done, we got to invite special family members (usually parents), we got to choose which families we wanted to sit with and all that. As we all got called up on stage and got our certificates (our homerooms were just our house groups, so it was done by house) they showed our year 7 photo (or a photo from kinder/junior school if the student came to the school before high school) next to our year 12 photo and we got one last house photo together. Our cohort voted valedictorian gave their speech (this was the highlight of the night for me) and then everyone got onto the dancefloor.

Valedictory was definitely my favourite, probably because it was the last big event I was gonna have with my cohort before we did exams and went our separate ways, so it's a nice memory to have.

[Bri MT]

I wore the exact same dress for every event that required one during high school and didn't get hair or makeup done. I can almost guarantee that - despite how alienating and uncomfortable it can feel to go against any social expectation -  you wouldn't have been the only one (I also doubt that many people would have known).

I'm glad you enjoyed the night despite the complications which impacted your experience

[hums_student]

We just had year 12 formal on Friday lol, so I thought I'd add to this thread...

It was a pretty awesome experience especially since our school cancelled our year 10 formal and year 11 social, so it was a new experience for all of us. Some people thought it was over-hyped but most of us were too excited for it we completely ignored the fact that we had a methods SAC that same day I'm sure this sounds incredibly cliched but I loved the experience. Getting ready for formal didn't take long for me, but it was an absolute nightmare for my sister lmao... God I'm glad I wasn't born a girl Anyway a bunch of friends came to our place and we all went in a limo (also first time in a limo, god the experience was surreal... no one bothered with seatbelts XD)

The actual venue was really fancy, I felt like I was on set of the Great Gatsby. To me the most surprising experience was seeing everyone dressed properly, because I'm so used to seeing all the guys with their shirts untucked and ties half-done up. I also have to make a point about the fact that I couldn't recognise three quarters of the girls there cos of all the makeup

We also had 10 sashes - best dressed (x2), best dancer (x2), cutest couple, teacher's pet, class clown, most talented, always late, and most opinionated. In my humble opinion, I have to say that the highlight of the night was when I won class clown. My sister also won most talented... apparently the school just really wanted to put a pair of twins on the podium hahaha... but the 'cutest couple' was actually hilarious, because the pair aren't actually dating. That didn't stop the DJ from playing 'Right Here Waiting' by Richard Marx when they came up on stage.

Also after viewing this post in preview mode I realised that I've overused the emoji way too many times.

ADD - Our school also has val on the 22nd of November, the day after VCE exams finish. Not sure if I'll even go though, since my last exam is on the 19th and I'm more than ready to leave the country as soon as it's over and not come back till I have to attend another institution known as university.

[Joseph41]

^How were the sashed decided? Like, did you vote?

[hums_student]

^How were the sashed decided? Like, did you vote?

Yep, we had a voting booth on the night and every student had a vote for each category, school captains had two votes each (talk about a democracy lol). The only sash the students didn't vote on was teacher's pet - which was decided by the teachers.

[Joseph41]

Bump! Class of 2019, how are you finding it all?