How do you overcome the feeling when your old friend passed away?

[Jenny_2108]

I got a message from my old friend's sister today and she said he passed away 4 months ago due to a car accident and she just knows I'm back my home country. Therefore, she asks whether I still keep the pics I took with him 3 years ago when we were close friends and whether I give those pics for her because she wanna maintain everything about her little brother.

But those pics were like a very long time ago. My parents moved house to other place and I wasnt in my country like 2yrs, now I can't find them anymore. I feel so guilty and regretful, I should have kept those pics carefully. I can't believe it was the last time I saw him and now I can't see him forever. I'm so shocked. Since getting her message, I just keep thinking about it and feel so sorrowful. I've never experienced this feeling before and this is the 1st time I lost someone who is my close friend in the past. The thought that I will never see him again in my life just makes me wanna cry. Tomorrow I will go to the church where he was there but its just his picture and I can't see his face anymore. I studied in a different country and didnt get chance to see him, and now when I'm back, he doesn't exist in this world anymore. I really hate myself right now...

Any ways not to think about that? It obsesses my mind all the time and I can't get my head off the image he crashed into the car and died.

[BigAl]

I know how it feels..I feel very sorry for you. I witnessed couple of my friends'  and my teacher's death ( not with naked eyes)...and that feeling is just unbearable because it feels like they are still alive and when you realise they are not, you feel so depressed. This world is mortal and we are all going to face death (even though I'm saying this, it is very hard to convince myself this feeling as an atheist) I hope you are okay because it really hurts you I know. This is all I can say; mortality of this world....I'm so sorry for your loss. Be patient. feel free to pm me.

We say ''Başın sağ olsun'' in my community -Health to your head, my condolences to you.

[alondouek]

I'm sending you both hugs right now.

The most important thing for you to do is to talk openly about how you feel to those closest to you, the people who you love the most; they're the ones who can get you through the way you're feeling now.

Also consider talking to a professional; a psychologist, especially one who works at a school (should you still be at school), is always trained in grief counselling - there's nothing to be lost and only good to be gained by talking to them.

My most profound condolences to you both; I hope you can find some happiness in this dark period.

As we say in my community: יהי זכרם ברוך - May their memories be blessed.

Please PM me if you need to talk

[Jenny_2108]

I know how it feels..I feel very sorry for you. I witnessed couple of my friends'  and my teacher's death ( not with naked eyes)...and that feeling is just unbearable because it feels like they are still alive and when you realise they are not, you feel so depressed. This world is mortal and we are all going to face death (even though I'm saying this, it is very hard to convince myself this feeling as an atheist) I hope you are okay because it really hurts you I know. This is all I can say; mortality of this world....I'm so sorry for your loss. Be patient. feel free to pm me.

We say ''Başın sağ olsun'' in my community -Health to your head, my condolences to you.

 Thank you! Your story is even sadder

 

I'm sending you both hugs right now.

The most important thing for you to do is to talk openly about how you feel to those closest to you, the people who you love the most; they're the ones who can get you through the way you're feeling now.

Also consider talking to a professional; a psychologist, especially one who works at a school (should you still be at school), is always trained in grief counselling - there's nothing to be lost and only good to be gained by talking to them.

My most profound condolences to you both; I hope you can find some happiness in this dark period.

As we say in my community: יהי זכרם ברוך - May their memories be blessed.

Please PM me if you need to talk

I think we just need time to get over it. Its like a sudden shock and I still can't believe it

[alondouek]

I think we just need time to get over it. Its like a sudden shock and I still can't believe it

Time heals all things. Experiencing loss of a friend who must have been so close to you is a pain that must be so devastating I cannot even begin to comprehend how you feel.

But you can rest assured that you're never alone; I am, and I'm sure the rest of the ATARnotes community, is here for you if you ever need an outlet or someone to speak to.

Grief is a part of life that, sadly, we must all face. But it is something we need never face alone.

Be well; I will keep you and your friend in my thoughts.

[Jenny_2108]

^ Thanks so much, alondouek! I feel so much better after reading your post.
Yeah you are right, sadness is a part of our lives and thanks AN such a good community I've ever joined in!