Communal University Journey Journal

[strawberries]

I know people say "join clubs" but I won't know anyone and idk how to be confident enough to participate in events etc??

feels omg haha

Just start talking to people at your lectures, tutes and pracs (if you have them)! That's what I've been doing It can be a bit slow, but once you start talking to people enough, you can make some really good friendships

nobody even seems willing to talk...

[sweetiepi]

feels omg haha
nobody even seems willing to talk...

I'm thinking about how I can be more social at uni since the past year and a half has been a roller coaster in my personal life but I'm ready to make the most of my time here before it's over??

I know people say "join clubs" but I won't know anyone and idk how to be confident enough to participate in events etc??

I find that people are actually really friendly, and are definitely willing to talk, even if you randomly ask someone how they are, when you sit down next to them in a lecture, workshop or tute. I'd also hang around any common rooms at uni, from experience it's well worth the wind-down time

That's what I've done for the past semester, and for my small cohort, it makes it easier for us to work as a group; as a fair portion of my semester is spent stuck in a group project or another.
I can't wait for a few days to rest, it's been hectic af recently, even though I've had a few wind-down breaks this week.

[brenden]

feels omg haha
nobody even seems willing to talk...

My first lecture at uni, I was sitting in a row, all to myself - smack bang in the middle. I had two hoodies on, both with the hoods over my head, earphones in, my arms crossed, my legs outstretched, sunk down in the chair, and with a fair scowl on my face as well.

I was literally trying my best to look like I didn't want to talk, and some fucking guy walks right up to me, stands there until I take my headphones out, sticks out his hand and says "Hi, I'm Nik!"

He turned out to be my best friend for a period of time, and dated my girlfriend's sister for nearly two years (I introduced them). I was willing to talk once he made the effort.

He was literally the only friend I made at uni - all credit goes to him haha.

Just try your best, don't worry if you get rejected.

If they don't talk back to you - they're too dumb to be friends with, so you dodged a bullet. And if they talk back - great. It's a win-win!!

[peterpiper]

nobody even seems willing to talk...

Haha they all secretly want friends. Everyone in uni is lonely af but they're all too proud to admit it Just talk to them anyway. There isn't even a worst scenario because the worst scenario is that they don't respond and tbh that's a reflection on them, and you're just being friendly. So just cruise on and have confidence! 

[strawberries]

Haha they all secretly want friends. Everyone in uni is lonely af but they're all too proud to admit it Just talk to them anyway. There isn't even a worst scenario because the worst scenario is that they don't respond and tbh that's a reflection on them, and you're just being friendly. So just cruise on and have confidence! 

hmm really?
idk, I feel some people are just cliquey and stuff but yeah...

[K888]

nobody even seems willing to talk...

Just start complaining about something. #1 guaranteed way to get someone to talk - people love complaining
(source: I love to complain)

[Joseph41]

I'm thinking about how I can be more social at uni since the past year and a half has been a roller coaster in my personal life but I'm ready to make the most of my time here before it's over??

I know people say "join clubs" but I won't know anyone and idk how to be confident enough to participate in events etc??

Do you know people from uni (even a little bit) at the moment?

[tashhhaaa]

thank you to everyone for your replies I appreciate them, sorry that i'm not directly replying to everyone but I'd be saying the same thing

I'm going to keep trying to interact with people in tutes but in my experience it's been harder in lectures

hmm really?
idk, I feel some people are just cliquey and stuff but yeah...

yes this is true. I've never experienced that so strongly at uni until this semester -- ALL of my tutes have cliques of people that all somehow know each other and I've never seen most of these people in my life lol
so it's a bit hard to infiltrate those kind of groups :/
I'm not looking for a social group because I think that's harder to get than just a few friends but what do you do when everyone is only keen on talking to their friends they already know? Understandable but it's so awkward for people on the outside

Do you know people from uni (even a little bit) at the moment?

not really, I used to because I actually made a few friends last year but those friendships cooled off when the semester ended and it would be extremely weird for me to contact them out of the blue now

Saying that though I did run into a friend from first semester of first year last semester and through her I got into contact with our mutual friend & they wanted to hang out etc but I had a lot of shit going on at the time and I couldn't so I probably looked like a snob BUT no that wasn't it, I suppose they'll never know that (we weren't close enough for me to explain)

I texted one of them (but it was like 6 weeks later oops) and I added her on snapchat when I saw her in my contacts but then as soon as she accepted me she posted on her story that she doesn't want to be friends with people who don't allocate her time or something? I know that could have been about anyone but since she didn't reply to my other message and she posted that I took it as being about me so I deleted her
and that was that

also ran into a friend from last year in a tute I wasn't meant to be in and we talked a bit but I got the vibe from her that she didn't want to hang out but it's ok I wasn't upset, I don't want to hang with me either TBH

I think it must have been easier to make friends in first year and I should have taken advantage of that because I didn't even make one friend last semester LOL

so tl;dr don't know anyone at the moment but I have one of my closest high school friends in one of my subjects (but not the same prac) so grateful for that, at least I see her in lectures

[K888]

> Don't feel bad for skipping uni when I can't be bothered going

> Feel bad for skipping uni when I'm sick and actually have a legitimate reason for not going

Logic

[heids]

we talked a bit but I got the vibe from her that she didn't want to hang out but it's ok I wasn't upset, I don't want to hang with me either TBH

Just a reminder that you not wanting to hang with you (I completely understand that) doesn't mean others don't want to.  At risk of sounding like a CBT-wielding shrink, "getting a vibe" doesn't mean it's true - it's just a thought or feeling.  And feeling unworthy doesn't make you unworthy. <3

[Shadowxo]

Good thing about uni - there are plenty of people to choose from! Just keep saying hi to people, especially those that are alone or in small groups. Say hi, introduce yourself, ask what subjects they're doing how they're finding it etc. feel free to complain a bit about how much work X subject gives, people love complaining.
Try introducing yourself in smaller classes as they're more likely to share big classes with you. If they only give one word answers etc then try someone else next time, if they seem friendly / they don't mind the chat then see if you can find them next time.
It's especially good to talk to people you're in a group with for pracs assignments etc
With regards to clubs, try to join a smaller one as it'll be easier to find people especially people who also don't know anyone. Just show up to events and say hi. This works well with either very few people (one is best) or a big group as you can just fit in
Good luck
Ps I'm nowhere near a socialite but I have gotten to know people by just being brave and saying hi

[K888]

Just read through this thread and realised I hadn't posted in here as much as I thought I had

End of week 2, and I've essentially achieved nothing this week due to being sick Hoping this virus disappears over the weekend so I can finally get some energy back and get on top of things.
Time to start the semester's major assignment this weekend, and catch up on my notes for all the lectures I either didn't go to or didn't pay attention to. In terms of non-uni stuff, I'm hoping I'll get close to finishing the puzzle I've been doing for a month and am currently stuck on haha.

Next week we start studying the shoulder, which is super exciting.
Covering the spine in the last two weeks has been interesting, but it just doesn't particularly tickle my fancy. I'm looking forward to covering the upper limb over the rest of the semester.

[Coffee]

4th August, 2017:

- Completed 50% of AT1 Draft #2 for Philosophy
- Researching for an upcoming Literature assignment. I'm feeling pretty excited about this one and I found some interesting secondary sources. Planning to head to the library at Monash on Monday and check out some things.
- Read some sources for upcoming History assignment.
- Read some more Literature readings.
- Crying because I have 5 assignments due this month.

[strawberries]

4th August 2017: I have Fridays off, but I still didn't get much done today

- did one of my readings for IR
- I did start my politics paper, but just some basic research...I still need to catch up on how I write this
- I also made some flashcards

[K888]

Was planning on doing so much this weekend. Have achieved absolutely nothing.
Really need to start finding a balance of when to study vs when to rest - the result of being at uni 5 days a week means I'm so exhausted by the time the weekend comes, I spend both days doing nothing uni related and just trying to psych myself up for the coming week.
Saturday is meant to be my rest day, but I work most Saturdays, so I kinda feel ripped off, and want to do nothing on Sundays too haha.

Hard to find a balance.