[English] Mark Knight cartoons analysis

[jane1234]

Cartoon One:
   Due to the recent debates regarding the Myki system, Mark Knight has created a cartoon which effectively ridicules the value of it. The focal subject is one of a man bent over, sorting through countless wires in the back of a Myki machine. The tangle of wires demonstrates the unruly nature of the system, and aims to convince viewers that it is unorganised and ineffective. The actual machine states that it is “out of order”, which seeks to persuade viewers that this Myki system is not working for Victoria’s transport industry. The main text states, as the man is fumbling through wires, that Myki is just a costly way to further slow down the transport system as it is “a very expensive boat anchor”. This endeavours to help the viewers realise that the Myki system is just putting a strain on public transport, and costing a lot to do so.

Cartoon Two:
   Mark Knight’s retort to worries over corruption of authority is evident in his cartoon; it points out the irony of ticket inspectors inducing violence, rather than controlling it. The image shows a frail-looking man appearing frightened and vulnerable as he peruses a warning sign. The sign states that “...if you are being bashed by a ticket inspector push button and speak” which mocks the position of power authority figures contain and abuse. This aspires to demonstrate to viewers that inspectors and transport officials have been influenced by corruption. Straight lines of the wall draw the eye to two sinister, dark figures that appear beastly and intimidating. However, the clipboards in their hands explicate that these men are some sort of transport official. This intends to convince viewers that transport authority figures are more likely to do harm than good, and to be wary of them.

Cartoon Three:
   In response to Julia Gillard’s recent proposal of spending $36 billion on a new internet system, Mark Knight uses a cartoon to satirise the extravagant plan. In this image, Julia Gillard is depicted with exaggerated, unflattering features and microphones surrounding her. This downplays her status as Prime Minister and makes her seem foolish and ignorant, which aims to have viewers questioning her skills as a leader. The text states that this internet system will “allow Australians in the future to download nude photos...” which mocks the effectiveness and value of such a system. In particular, the word “Australians” conveys a sense of patriotism in the viewer and helps them realise that the new internet does not benefit the country. This seeks to influence the viewer into thinking that the government shouldn’t be needlessly spending money on something which has no significance to the country.


Any feedback will be helpful

[Water]

Cartoon One:
   Due to the recent debates regarding the Myki system, Mark Knight has created a cartoon which effectively ridicules the value of it Extremely vague statement that borders onto unnecessary. The focal subject is one of a man Nothing about Transport Minister? bent over, sorting through countless wires in the back of a Myki machine. The tangle of wires demonstrates the unruly nature of the system, and aims to convince viewers that it is unorganised and ineffective Good. The actual machine There are two machines??? states that it is “out of order”, which seeks to persuade viewers that this Myki system is not working for Victoria’s transport industry but rather for corporate companies or . The main text Whats the main text?states, as the man is fumbling through wires, that Myki is just a costly way to further slow down awkward the transport system as it is “a very expensive boat anchor”. This endeavours to help the for the viewers to realise the inconceivable truth,that the Myki system is just putting a strain on public transport, and costing a lot to do so last sentence was awkward.

Cartoon Two:
   Mark Knight’s retort to worries over corruption of authority is evident in his cartoon; it points out the irony of ticket inspectors inducing violence, rather than controlling it. The image shows a frail-looking man appearing frightened and vulnerable as he peruses a warning sign. The sign states that “...if you are being bashed by a ticket inspector push button and speak” which mocks the position of power authority figures containr] and abuse Doesn't make sense with contain and abuse. This aspires to demonstrate to viewers that inspectors and transport officials have been influenced by corruption "are under" the influence. Straight lines of the wall draw the eye to two sinister, dark figures that appear beastly Lol, Beastly, abit awkward, and not sure if its in right context and intimidating. You don't need However. Actually, the however made me not understand your next two sentences, as they were relevant to one another.However, the clipboards in their hands explicate that these men are some sort of transport official. This intends to convince viewers that transport authority figures are more likely to do harm than good, and to be wary of them.

Cartoon Three:
   In response to Julia Gillard’s recent proposal of spending $36 billion on a new internet system, Mark Knight uses a cartoon to satirise the extravagant plan. In this image, Julia Gillard is depicted with exaggerated, unflattering features and microphones surrounding her. This downplays her status as Prime Minister and makes her seem foolish and ignorant, which aims to have viewers questioning her skills Abilities as a leader. The text states use suggests, or implies. States is too hard worded, which we are trying to interpret the cartoon that this internet system will “allow Australians in the future to download nude photos...” which mocks the effectiveness and value of such a system. In particular, the word “Australians” conveys a sense of patriotism in the viewer and helps them realise Surely your being lazy here? that the new internet does not benefit the country. This seeks to influence the viewer into thinking that the government shouldn’t be needlessly spending money on something which has no significance to the country.


Any feedback will be helpful








General Comment: Overall, it is a good analysis, probably easier to write as the co ordinator requested the images to be written as separate paragraphs rather than a whole essay. You successfully implemented the structure of TEE in the following cartoons and I was being very nit picky with your wordings and grammar as you can see. I think that, there should be more work on variations in your word choices, like, rather than state, you can use suggest or imply or whatever as I stated above. At times, you did lose a bit of fluency, got bit wordy and had some syntax errors.  Overall though, I think this was a good effort

Score: 6.8- 7.4   <<<<<<<<<<<The mark can be anywhere between a 6.8 and a 7.4, If I was to be more critical, I would prefer you to be more concise in your portrayal of your images. I do feel abit iffy about your second paragraph, where you JUST touch on corruption , however move away from it and talk about their appearance. This I felt, really pained me, as the corruption idea couldve been really developed. In your third paragraph, try to refrain from using "effective or value," it really is just generic and vague in general.  

Further desire would be , when your doing the effects on the reader, don't use "thinking",  "seeks to influence" at moderation. Use words such as provokes, arouse, etc..etc.... Just appears much more sophisticated and somewhat slightly more verbose.





Having said all that, I do believe that many would give this between a solid 7 - 7.3

[leona0123]

I think that your third analysis in particular was really good because you have described the intended effect of some of the cartoon's features, particularly the exaggeration of Gillard's features. It is also good to see that you have stated what Knight wants to viewer to believe in each analysis.
As you can probably tell by this and my three analyses I don't know a lot about analysing cartoons. The only thing I can suggest is for you to work on your vocab, grammar and sentence structure a little bit. It will make your work sound more sophisticated. Try using the thesaurus on Word if you find yourself repeating the same words all the time. It works for me
Hope this helps!