Facebook Parenting: For the troubled teen.

[Wazzup]

This video has gone viral on the net
He starts off reasonable enough but ends with all guns blazing (no pun intended).

http://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=player_embedded&v=kl1ujzRidmU

[burbs]

Saw this earlier. In my non-adult non-parent opinion, he didn't handle it that well (Reddit has been claiming its brilliant parenting, same with the youtube comments).

I think the main problem is that he made it in a video and uploaded it. By all means shoot your daughter's laptop (hope there wasn't a battery in it), but putting it on the net seems to cross a line - and is going as low as his daughter did: making it public when it should be private.

He was emotional, which is completely understandable because that's a horrible thing for her to do, but it clouded his judgement a bit. If he wanted to shoot the laptop to teach her a lesson he could have just made her watch it instead of making a video.

Incidentally, anyone else feel that if they did the same thing their parents would have just kicked them straight out instead of revoking laptop priveliges?

[JinXi]

My parent would've shot me instead of the laptop... just sayin' (Not that I would do anything close to this) I do believe that the dad had the right to do what he did, but he shouldn't had posted it on facebook, as it proves that his mentality isn't much better then his daughter.

[paulsterio]

I disagree with what this guy has done, it's not good parenting, it's horrible parenting. He did not sit down with his daughter and talk through the issues which she had. He did exactly the same thing as she did. He had a fit about it, he acted unreasonably and he made it public. He also demonstrates poor anger management and control and in reality, what he's done doesn't solve the issue.

It's not about forcing and threatening kids to do their chores or to take on responsibilities. It's helping them understand why doing so is beneficial to them and allowing them to see and understand for themselves why they should be doing chores/taking on responsibilities.

You can force them to do something by threatening and doing stupid actions like what this guy has done, but that encourages rebellion and bitterness, it does nothing for the relationship and it harbours a sense of opposition. Had he tried to help her understand the benefits, not only is he treating her as a grown up, but he is encouraging her to do the right thing as well and setting a good example of how we should resolve conflicts.

[jane1234]

As if he shot the laptop. I would have just sold it on eBay and made $$$.

They both shouldn't have posted what they did, but somehow I don't think that sitting down and helping her 'understand the benefits' of chores is going to do much to change an ungrateful 15yo brat. I still think some kind of punishment was needed, but it should have been kept private and reasonable.

[paulsterio]

But how do we know that she is a 15 year old brat? I rant and vent about people on my facebook statuses all the time (ok, not an essay - like what she did) but surely, everyone can vent about things to their friends, I still think what he did was unreasonable.

Btw, jane, I understand your point of view, but how does doing what he did change anything, it just encourages her to be more rebellious, it's totally undiplomatic.

I think that before our kids can act like adults, we have to treat them like adults.

[burbs]

I rant and vent about people on my facebook statuses all the time (ok, not an essay - like what she did) but surely, everyone can vent about things to their friends, I still think what he did was unreasonable.

Sidenote: probs don't do that on facebook. If you want to vent and rant, do it to your friends in person.

[jane1234]

I rant and vent about people on my facebook statuses all the time (ok, not an essay - like what she did) but surely, everyone can vent about things to their friends, I still think what he did was unreasonable.

Sidenote: probs don't do that on facebook. If you want to vent and rant, do it to your friends in person.

Yeah exactly. I have gotten angry at people heaps of times before, but I would never post it on facebook where it's public.

And Paul yeah I don't know her, but seriously - "my parents should pay me for chores" - really? Chores are something pretty much everyone has had to do at least at some point in their life, and that girl is going to find out that there will be a lot more chores to do when she moves out. I don't think either handled it very well, but sometimes kids just don't listen to logic & reason so the whole "treat her like an adult" theory doesn't always work.

[Stick]

This punishment definitely outweighs the crime and this girl is going to have some serious mental issues having been humiliated in front of the whole world.

I'm not excusing what she's done - it was totally unacceptable. But her father's role is to guide and help her make the correct decisions in life. All teenagers go through a period of rebellion and he did not handle this well at all. I believe he only thought about himself in this situation and not about her. He basically did the same thing as she did. <_<

An extensive grounded period would have been more suitable in my opinion.

[Mariammm]

"my parents should pay me for chores" - really?

I don't think she realizes that thats her duty not a favor ... Honestly, if parents got paid for everything they did, alot of them would be millionaires by now. We really should have an international 'Parents Appreciation Day' - I guess mother's and father's day serve that purpose

[ShortBlackChick]

This guy must be a curry or an asian in disguise, thats all I can say.

[Hodgeyhodgey]

I think she got what she deserved. If she continues to expect everything to go her way for such little commitment to chores/work/etc, then I can't wait until she sees the real world and has to fend for herself.

[Camo]

His an I.T professional, but I believe his crossed the line. Shooting the laptop and expecting her to pay for it? Seems a bit crazy. There are quite a few things I want to say to this video, cause it kind of makes me a little worried at his exact parenting style. Anyone that needs to resort to using a weapon to get their point across is taking things way to far, and I'm honestly afraid for the safety of this girl even if she is a little smart ass.

However on the other hand he might have taken this the wrong way and lied about what she actually does do? It wouldn't be the first time I've heard of even personally been in a situation that my schooling was prevented, delayed or even disrupted because of parenting.

[paulsterio]

Why is it that people only see it from the father's point of view?
Is it because it's the only point of view that you're hearing?

It's not right to judge someone based on one thing that they've written when they're obviously angry and not feeling up to scratch mentally?!!
I think everyone's just jumped in and had a go at the girl just because no-one's heard her point of view.

If I had a gun, I'd go and shoot up his stuff as punishment for inappropriately humiliating his daughter. We'll see how he feels.

Btw, maybe this is one of the reasons why teenage suicide is too high, bad parenting, not helping their teenage children, but pressuring them further. No wonder they have nowhere to turn

[ShortBlackChick]

ahahaha you let your kids roam free, no rules no discipline you get accused of bad parenting (which it is,) you provide for your kids in the best way possible with education and other 'wants' like a laptop and when you try to discipline them when they step out of line and disrespect you when you are only trying to make them decent humans and learn about hardwork, you get accused of bad parenting.

LOL