At the heart of a multiplicity of situations and the actions of individuals is an ulterior motive, whether this is concealed or bared in the open. Oftentimes hidden behind the guise of political agendas and a clever series of manipulations, personal gain frequently proves to be the ultimate goal of individuals from all walks of life.
Fantastic conceptual introduction here, I really like how it is presented. Excellent. Regardless of apparent political motivations, be they a desire for the maintenance of government or the preservation of political relations, it is invariably this pursuit of personal advantage that drives the thoughts and actions of a persona. This in turn affects and distorts the way in which an individual seeks to represent themselves, as well as the approach an author takes in characterisation and representation of events. These concepts are repeatedly revealed in William Shakespeare’s King Henry IV Part 1 and Victoria Aveyard’s The Red Queen.
I love how conceptual you've gone with this Thesis, but (and I almost never say this), it's a tad too much! Try to spend no more than two/three sentences setting up your concept, then introduce your text, and then from there focus on the module aims: How techniques are used to represent a perspective! The concepts are amazing though, just need to reign them in a tad.Authors create contrast between a character’s political motivations and their personal agenda in representing the varying perceptions of circumstance and character. This is evident in Shakespeare’s representation Worcester, a rebel fighting in Hotspur’s ranks.
Slight expression issue there (representation OF Worcester, and I'd say "the character of Worcester too," but fantastic conceptual start to the paragraph. Initially portrayed as a careful politician, Worcester’s interests appear firmly bound to the success of the rebels. Shakespeare leads the audience to form this view via a juxtaposition of Worcester and Hotspur, highlighting a clash in personality through dialogue.
Slightly retell here, do you have an example of this juxtaposition? Quotes/filmic techniques which achieve it? This contrast allows Worcester to appear reasonable, with clear and honourable political motivations. Worcester patiently draws Hotspur's attention to the need to "stop all sight-holes, every loop from whence the eye of reason may pry in upon us."
Technique? Worcester’s calmly presented and persuasive argument for caution against any opportunity for advantage for the opposition is met by quick, heated rejection by Hotspur, whose lack of care appears to be leading to his demise.
Retell. Hotspur throws caution to the wind, proclaiming: "Let them (the enemy) come!...Come, let me taste my horse."
Retell, and be sure to keep your expression in the academic style, try not to use idiomatic phrasing (caution to the wind)! As the plot progresses, however, Worcester’s true priorities are revealed via dramatic irony through his failure to deliver a message of peace from the king. Once again, Worcester’s genius of persuasion is revealed, ironically in this case, as he conspires to conceal this information from Hotspur in order to preserve his own interests.
Retell. This reversal exposes Worcester as a clever manipulator, entertaining a greater loyalty to himself than to the rebel cause. Shakespeare thus demonstrates the reality of division between those who present themselves as followers of the same cause, a truth made more poignant by the contrast in the use to which Worcester placed his oratory talents; providing a clear warning for those of his day who entertained thoughts of rebellion against the current order.
Some great ideas and textual knowledge here, but this paragraph is a little too text focused. Elements of retell strewn throughout, it's a very "This happened in the text which shows this about the characters" style of analysis. I'm looking instead for how the composer has used techniques to represent something TO THE AUDIENCE. This usually doesn't require description of character emotions (though that can come in in this Module), and it definitely doesn't require plot details!In correlation to this, Aveyard draws on the tendency of characters to work primarily for the promotion of self-interest under the guise of nobility, duty or political necessity. In so doing, Aveyard takes advantage of the characterisation of Queen Elara. Initially, Queen Elara is portrayed as a woman who, although cold and calculating, is motivated by the maintenance of peaceful government and the protection of her own family.
HOW is this characterisation achieved? Aveyard succeeds in creating this impression on the audience via an unreliable narrator, who is herself deceived by Queen Elara’s efforts to represent herself as a dutiful member of the royal family, her hand forced by her honourable purpose. The audience abruptly comes to realise a new perspective of Elara’s motives through a plot twist which reveals Elara’s manipulation of events and her capitalisation of her position to gain more power for her son, and take revenge on her husband, the king, for his perceived dismissal of her child.
Good, still looking for some quote inclusion though! This is revealed through symbolism and contrast: as the protagonist, Mare, enters the throne room, her eyes fall on the Queen dressed “in nothing but a thin white gown,” the simplicity of her attire and the connotations of the colour white presenting as outwardly pure and forthright.
Good techniques and analysis, but still too plot driven! See below for an example. Juxtaposed with her words to Mare: “Anyone can betray anyone,” this demonstrates a new dimension to Elara’s character. This new perspective causes Elara’s character and actions to be viewed in an entirely different light by the audience due to the author’s changed representation of her political role, and highlights once more a truth that transcends genre: regardless of the persona’s political motives, personal gain remains at the forefront of their actions.
Good, this paragraph is better, but still slightly text driven!Shakespeare’s work is noted for his ability to create a cross-section of society and represent the political agendas within the class system.
I'd like a slightly more conceptual introduction here like you gave me earlier, however I do love the link to Shakespeare's work as a whole, that is a nice tough. By creating a stark disparity between the parties present in the King’s court and those who frequent the tavern, Shakespeare actually succeeds in highlighting one distinct similarity: despite the dissimilar political incentives held by nobles and the commoners, a common drive is their striving for self-preservation, and if possible, personal gain.
Cool idea, an ever so slightly less text focused approach would benefit you (just say what Shakespeare is saying with the text, you don't need that level of plot detail). Frequent change of setting from an opulent throne room to a threadbare tavern creates a visual representation of this divide, brought into focus in the relationship between Prince Hal and Falstaff.
Good. Through soliloquy, Hal reveals that his true motives lie in attaining more power, and without effort, by building a rapport with the people before ascending the throne. Hal uses extended metaphor in his explanation: “herein I will imitate the Sun, who doth permit the …clouds smother up his beauty from the world, that…he may be more wondered at by breaking through the …mists”.
Try to get the quote and technique into the same sentences as it is introduced: The sentence on the soliloquy doesn't offer much! By comparing himself to the celestial sun, Hal emphasises the magnitude of the consequences of his actions, impressing the scale of his self-misrepresentation on his audience.
Technique? Falstaff, although represented as a character in entirely different circumstances to Hal and with no obvious political motivation or ambition at all, epitomised by his derision of ‘honour…a mere scutcheon”, makes an opportunistic appeal for honour and a higher station.
Technique? This plot twist which appears uncharacteristic of seemingly unambitious Falstaff brings to audience’s attention the reality that personal gain is never far from the mind of even the least ambitious. Shakespeare thus makes a subtle commentary on this aspect of human nature and its common thread through those of any class.
Same comments as above, your ideas are fantastic, just need to step away from the text a little bit!Aveyard too creates a deep divide between classes in order to demonstrate the omnipresence of the innate tendency which moves people to pursue personal agendas regardless of the political climate in which they reside.
Cool. The visual symbolism of red blooded and silver blooded citizens becomes a pointed, simplified representation of the nature of these two societies: seemingly polar opposites.
Fantastic. The ‘red’ society is presented as a manifestation of all that is repressed and downtrodden. The description: “security officers are everywhere, their…silver uniforms standing out in the crowds,” gives the impression that silver security forces, the means of oppression has become such a part of the political atmosphere and way of life that they ‘stand out’ more than the red citizens themselves.
Retell, and there are better techniques in that example than just description (imagery,, symbolism, etc). It is in this very setting, however, that “a gang of kids, little thieves in training, flutters through with searching, sticky fingers.”
Retell. Although the politics of the regime these children have been raised in would surely dictate compliance to forces which would not hesitate to punish them, they push aside actions which would serve as a safeguard in favour of stealing for their own gain, the use of the verb ‘flutters’ indicating a sense of disregard for consequences. This thus demonstrates the human traits that shine through in a society where free will is limited converge with the mentality of those who live in relative freedom, and that despite a political climate which would motivate citizens to compliance, personal gain is always at the forefront, even to the point of rebellion.
Your concepts are really sophisticated, extremely clever, it is just your analysis style that needs a tune 
As evidence from the above texts suggests, the pursuit of personal advantage in spite of political provocations is a distinct trait which transcends class, personality, political climate and even the range of motivations themselves. This ulterior motive, whether it is despite the political situation or capitalises on it as a guise, repeatedly affects the way in which a persona represents themselves to other, and frequently distorts the approach taken by an author in representing situations and people.
Your conclusion needs a little more meat than this, try expanding on some of the points made in that last sentence! The "approach taken by an author in representing situations and people" is the focus of the Module, give it a little more importance 
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Topic: English Advanced Essay Marking (Modules Only) (Read 732393 times)