Jill Meagher's Disappearance Poses Some Interesting Questions to Discuss

[thushan]

I believe his name is Thomas the Tank Engine.

[Russ]

Generalizing it as a "lesson to all men" is just depicting every man as a potential rapist, which is a) bad and b) somewhat offensive

[brenden]

I believe his name is Thomas the Tank Engine.

My apologies 'dilmah'

Generalizing it as a "lesson to all men" is just depicting every man as a potential rapist, which is a) bad and b) somewhat offensive

Oh yeah, fair call.

[enwiabe]

http://static.happyplace.com/assets/images/2011/10/4e9dc53133cf4.jpg

[Special At Specialist]

http://static.happyplace.com/assets/images/2011/10/4e9dc53133cf4.jpg

A very blunt approach, but I like it

Generalizing it as a "lesson to all men" is just depicting every man as a potential rapist, which is a) bad and b) somewhat offensive

Maybe the wording "lesson to all men" is a bit exaggerated. If they changed it to "a lesson to all rapists" then that would be less sexist and less offensive.

[paulsterio]

EDIT: Told my mum. Her response was along the lines of "i blame her, its her fault. she knows its dangerous, yet she still did it. what he did was very wrong, but she shouldn't have put herself in the situation in the first place." She had also earlier said "what is this woman doing at a bar at 1 am in the morning? womans (sic) should be home by 9 pm. she was probably a drunk." I couldn't believe my ears.

I think your mother raises a good point Thushan, of course, I'm sure we all agree that what the man did was very wrong - there's no doubt about that, but of course, the woman in this situation has some responsibility as well. When I go outside, safety is obviously something that I keep in mind, I stick to areas that are safe, I avoid areas where I feel uncomfortable and I try to keep myself out of situations where I may possibly be open to danger. If bad comes to bad, I get a friend/family to accompany me.

Whilst it may be harsh to blame Jill herself, she did put herself in a position of vulnerability. Let's just say there was a probability of 1/10,000 that she would be attacked, if she puts herself in that position, then there is a chance that she will be attacked. I think what this does is serve as a reminder for all of us to stay safe and remember to keep our own safety in check. Obviously we can't live our lives without taking risks, but like with everything, we need to think about our actions and think about the consequences which can come of it.

For example, if I didn't have my car on me, I could easily catch public transport at night or I could pay more, catch a cab and foot the bill. I have a clear choice and I'll take on the one that is safer, because that safety is worth more to me than a small amount of money. In Jill's situation, she could have easily caught a cab, got someone else to walk home with her, gotten a family member to pick her up...etc. there were just so many things which she could have done in order to avoid the dangerous situation.

The truth is, I honestly think your mum has a very good point and the lesson of this story is that we should all look out for our own safety, not putting ourselves in situations of high risk and always keeping safety on the top of our minds.

[JellyDonut]

Hindsight and stuff.

It's completely understandable why she made those decisions i.e., not get walked home, catch a cab or have her husband pick her up, when she lived 5 minutes away from the bar.

[paulsterio]

It's completely understandable why she made those decisions i.e., not get walked home, catch a cab or have her husband pick her up, when she lived 5 minutes away from the bar.

Of course it is, but I'm just pointing out that Thushan's mum's view of the situation isn't as bad as many would think.

[thushan]

My problemwas mainly with the assumption that the woman was probably a drunkard and wild because she was not at home after 9 pm

[brenden]

Paul how on Earth was Jill in any way, shape or form responsible for her own death?

[paulsterio]

Paul how on Earth was Jill in any way, shape or form responsible for her own death?

How, in any way, shape or form did I say that she was responsible?

I said that we are all responsible for our own safety and that we should always remember to protect ourselves, which I still stand with, i.e. stay safe

[Water]

Paul how on Earth was Jill in any way, shape or form responsible for her own death?

How, in any way, shape or form did I say that she was responsible?

EDIT: Told my mum. Her response was along the lines of "i blame her, its her fault. she knows its dangerous, yet she still did it. what he did was very wrong, but she shouldn't have put herself in the situation in the first place." She had also earlier said "what is this woman doing at a bar at 1 am in the morning? womans (sic) should be home by 9 pm. she was probably a drunk." I couldn't believe my ears.

Answer

Whilst it may be harsh to blame Jill herself, she did put herself in a position of vulnerability.

 

[paulsterio]

She was responsible for putting herself in danger yes, but not for being attacked.

If I take risks on the road, I'm responsible for putting myself in danger but if some idiot rear-ends me by his own fault, he's still responsible for that. There is a difference.

I don't like people bending my words to suit their argument

[thushan]

I'm with Paul on this one. Putting yourself in a position of vulnerability by being out at night alone is your responsibility, being attacked, raped and killed is absolutely NOT your responsibility at all. They're two separate things that shouldn't be confused.

[brenden]

Then my apologies Paul. It wasn't my intention to twist your words but

I think your mother raises a good point Thushan, of course, I'm sure we all agree that what the man did was very wrong - there's no doubt about that, but of course, the woman in this situation has some responsibility as well.

my interpretation stemmed from that, and the quote that Water used as well. And in saying Thushan's Mum raised a good point I though you were agreeing with her statement "I blame her. It's her fault."